Stephen James
@cuthbertscoast.bsky.social
My door handle is next to the hinge
December 16, 2025 at 11:50 PM
My door handle is next to the hinge
"I want the app, not the podcast"
December 16, 2025 at 3:30 PM
"I want the app, not the podcast"
Moi aussi. I enjoy wagging finger videos that show you how to do something absurdly easy by some obscure method. This clip was from instructions for filling an ice cube tray without splashing water. If only that were a problem.
December 8, 2025 at 8:07 AM
Moi aussi. I enjoy wagging finger videos that show you how to do something absurdly easy by some obscure method. This clip was from instructions for filling an ice cube tray without splashing water. If only that were a problem.
8 year old god-daughter: You're not married, are you?
Me: No, I'm not married.
G-d: And Mary, my god-mother. She's not married.
Me: No, Mary's not married.
G-d:
Me:
(Grown ups just can't take a hint, apparently)
Me: No, I'm not married.
G-d: And Mary, my god-mother. She's not married.
Me: No, Mary's not married.
G-d:
Me:
(Grown ups just can't take a hint, apparently)
November 29, 2025 at 6:24 PM
8 year old god-daughter: You're not married, are you?
Me: No, I'm not married.
G-d: And Mary, my god-mother. She's not married.
Me: No, Mary's not married.
G-d:
Me:
(Grown ups just can't take a hint, apparently)
Me: No, I'm not married.
G-d: And Mary, my god-mother. She's not married.
Me: No, Mary's not married.
G-d:
Me:
(Grown ups just can't take a hint, apparently)
A friend's favourite saying about his birthplace, Doncaster:
It was bleak, you could see three slag heaps through my bedroom window. And that was from outside looking in.
It was bleak, you could see three slag heaps through my bedroom window. And that was from outside looking in.
November 23, 2025 at 11:03 AM
A friend's favourite saying about his birthplace, Doncaster:
It was bleak, you could see three slag heaps through my bedroom window. And that was from outside looking in.
It was bleak, you could see three slag heaps through my bedroom window. And that was from outside looking in.
Impressive. I failed an audition for Get Carter and I also do not appear in a crowd watching a jazz band in Scotswood in a film promoting communism
November 23, 2025 at 12:37 AM
Impressive. I failed an audition for Get Carter and I also do not appear in a crowd watching a jazz band in Scotswood in a film promoting communism
I have the conch. You must listen to me.
November 20, 2025 at 10:01 AM
I have the conch. You must listen to me.
Jeremy Bentham?
November 15, 2025 at 6:08 PM
Jeremy Bentham?
gogo - who said "Gogo light—bough not break—Gogo dead. Didi heavy—bough break—Didi alone."
November 15, 2025 at 9:07 AM
gogo - who said "Gogo light—bough not break—Gogo dead. Didi heavy—bough break—Didi alone."
“No. Even now I can't altogether believe that any of this really happened...”
November 10, 2025 at 11:27 AM
“No. Even now I can't altogether believe that any of this really happened...”
Tough. Needing to do admirable things in order to earn indifference is usually the lot of elected politicians
November 10, 2025 at 9:23 AM
Tough. Needing to do admirable things in order to earn indifference is usually the lot of elected politicians
Fishie or no fishie I have not seen owt of your bonnie lad and I don't care
November 9, 2025 at 9:30 PM
Fishie or no fishie I have not seen owt of your bonnie lad and I don't care
You can mark your territory this way, but best advice is to wait until you have been reincarnated as a dog or a bear before trying
November 9, 2025 at 9:09 PM
You can mark your territory this way, but best advice is to wait until you have been reincarnated as a dog or a bear before trying
Today: curiosity made me do more than just observe. Chinese family of three picking Nashi apples from a street tree in Ealing using long poles to knock them into a bag. I had never heard of this variety: they are large apples that taste like pears. They gave me one from their harvest.
November 9, 2025 at 9:06 PM
Today: curiosity made me do more than just observe. Chinese family of three picking Nashi apples from a street tree in Ealing using long poles to knock them into a bag. I had never heard of this variety: they are large apples that taste like pears. They gave me one from their harvest.
Good for you. And to them I say Faugh!
November 7, 2025 at 12:04 AM
Good for you. And to them I say Faugh!
Sorry. I expect you understand now that's how a boy tells a girl he likes her
November 6, 2025 at 4:05 PM
Sorry. I expect you understand now that's how a boy tells a girl he likes her
two hour power cut every clear night so we can see the Milky Way
November 6, 2025 at 8:32 AM
two hour power cut every clear night so we can see the Milky Way
You had your chance. Now you'll just have to put up with not having a thing you don't want.
November 5, 2025 at 5:07 PM
You had your chance. Now you'll just have to put up with not having a thing you don't want.
sorry, I'm busy influencing another election today
November 5, 2025 at 2:16 AM
sorry, I'm busy influencing another election today
Oh, Sam, you shouldn't believe everything you read in "What Cheer?" and "Gladly" magazines
November 4, 2025 at 7:39 AM
Oh, Sam, you shouldn't believe everything you read in "What Cheer?" and "Gladly" magazines
I think what used to be awesome became sick and is currently clutch
November 2, 2025 at 10:16 AM
I think what used to be awesome became sick and is currently clutch
I wondered when that Germanic 1980s electronic pop duo look would come back
October 30, 2025 at 5:39 PM
I wondered when that Germanic 1980s electronic pop duo look would come back