Also, Stanley's son, Rayner, wrote to say there was too much 'hobbit talk' in the drafts of the opening chapters of the sequel Tolkien was writing. Although Tolkien never said so, this smug little know-it-all git was probably the real reason he would later shop the book around to other publishers.

But the people of #MiddleEarth didn't celebrate #Easter anyway because Lich King Jesus didn't come until much later. When he did, he arrived in the far East. That probably pissed off the Make Arnor Great Again folks.

But since the Bagginses were clearly not sharing their time-travel tech with anyone else, sod them. As Mr Spock said, the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few. And Boromir+dad = 2. And most maths heads agree 2 > 1. Also Mr Spock has done a music video in the shire. Time travel confirmed.

As we've learned previously, the mantle clock and locomotive prove Middle-earth time travel. If Boromir had only used Bilbo's time machine he could have swapped his brother in with the Uruks while he himself dealt with Frodo. Then everyone might've ended up happy including Denethor. Except Frodo.

That explains a night out in Bradford my mate Paul had.

Don't be thick. Everyone knows we're in the 6th or 7th age.

My mate Paul eats most of that most weeks and he once lived in a flat with no windows. But his flat was the only one in the building that never required pest fumigation.