CrapPortraits
@crapportraits.bsky.social
Commissions considered, as presents for people you hate.
@Crap_portraits on twitter
www.hisdancingleg.com
@Crap_portraits on twitter
www.hisdancingleg.com
I can’t begin to believe how excited you are to see a Friday portrait. It’s hardly a weekend without one.
youll no doubt be relieved and astounded in equal measure to hear that no AI was used in its production.
truly crap, but you wouldn’t have it by other way.
youll no doubt be relieved and astounded in equal measure to hear that no AI was used in its production.
truly crap, but you wouldn’t have it by other way.
November 21, 2025 at 6:55 PM
I can’t begin to believe how excited you are to see a Friday portrait. It’s hardly a weekend without one.
youll no doubt be relieved and astounded in equal measure to hear that no AI was used in its production.
truly crap, but you wouldn’t have it by other way.
youll no doubt be relieved and astounded in equal measure to hear that no AI was used in its production.
truly crap, but you wouldn’t have it by other way.
I haven’t done a brilliant portrait in a long time. No change there then.
August 15, 2025 at 8:55 PM
I haven’t done a brilliant portrait in a long time. No change there then.
Who doesn't love a bargain?
August 14, 2025 at 8:05 PM
Who doesn't love a bargain?
Just out getting a bit of shopping... spotted this
July 22, 2025 at 5:42 PM
Just out getting a bit of shopping... spotted this
Here’s a portrait I did six years ago. I don’t really like most of my portraits but I like a few, this is one, even though it’s crap (obvs).
July 18, 2025 at 8:38 PM
Here’s a portrait I did six years ago. I don’t really like most of my portraits but I like a few, this is one, even though it’s crap (obvs).
OK, Ive had a short break from portraits and this week I have returned to charcoal.
You'll be relieved to know that no fragment of skill has accidentally be lodged in this weeks portrait. Normal service has been resumed.
You'll be relieved to know that no fragment of skill has accidentally be lodged in this weeks portrait. Normal service has been resumed.
June 27, 2025 at 6:01 PM
OK, Ive had a short break from portraits and this week I have returned to charcoal.
You'll be relieved to know that no fragment of skill has accidentally be lodged in this weeks portrait. Normal service has been resumed.
You'll be relieved to know that no fragment of skill has accidentally be lodged in this weeks portrait. Normal service has been resumed.
Easily the worst park I've seen in a decade. There was no one in the car, this is a "park".
June 25, 2025 at 9:58 PM
Easily the worst park I've seen in a decade. There was no one in the car, this is a "park".
Sunday dose of tranquillity
June 1, 2025 at 7:09 PM
Sunday dose of tranquillity
#1776 this is actor Laurence Fishburne
May 31, 2025 at 5:33 PM
#1776 this is actor Laurence Fishburne
#1775 this is actor Ciaran Hinds
May 31, 2025 at 5:28 PM
#1775 this is actor Ciaran Hinds
Friday night, must be time for a portrait. I have a feeling you’ll not guess this one.
May 23, 2025 at 6:01 PM
Friday night, must be time for a portrait. I have a feeling you’ll not guess this one.
It’s Friday portrait time, for those of you that can be bothered. I really must get back to paper one of these days.
Not this week though.
Not this week though.
May 9, 2025 at 6:01 PM
It’s Friday portrait time, for those of you that can be bothered. I really must get back to paper one of these days.
Not this week though.
Not this week though.
Friday goslings in the sunshine.
May 9, 2025 at 1:50 PM
Friday goslings in the sunshine.
Here’s a portrait I drew in April 2017.
April 19, 2025 at 1:29 PM
Here’s a portrait I drew in April 2017.
It’s Friday, it’s portrait time,so you get this. I suppose you should be grateful. It could be worse. Probably.
April 4, 2025 at 6:00 PM
It’s Friday, it’s portrait time,so you get this. I suppose you should be grateful. It could be worse. Probably.
It’s Friday so time for another dose of crap to be released down the sluice.
March 28, 2025 at 7:00 PM
It’s Friday so time for another dose of crap to be released down the sluice.
Friday portrait time. You’re overdue a very difficult guess. But I had to give you this dead easy one, it’s as easy as baking bread.
March 21, 2025 at 7:00 PM
Friday portrait time. You’re overdue a very difficult guess. But I had to give you this dead easy one, it’s as easy as baking bread.
So Trumps “revenge” for Canada making things dearer for Americans is to … checks notes … make things dearer for Americans.
March 11, 2025 at 6:24 PM
So Trumps “revenge” for Canada making things dearer for Americans is to … checks notes … make things dearer for Americans.
What a massive mistake.
March 7, 2025 at 7:56 PM
What a massive mistake.
Can anyone parse this headline from Belfast Telegraph? My brain hurts trying to work out what words should have been there. Baffling.
@belfasttelegraph.co.uk
@belfasttelegraph.co.uk
March 5, 2025 at 11:22 PM
Can anyone parse this headline from Belfast Telegraph? My brain hurts trying to work out what words should have been there. Baffling.
@belfasttelegraph.co.uk
@belfasttelegraph.co.uk
I used to get this all the time, not any more though, now that it's....
March 3, 2025 at 3:33 PM
I used to get this all the time, not any more though, now that it's....
Reminds me of one of one my favourite tree photos taken about 20 years ago, before it became famous from the game of thrones hisdancingleg.com/gallery/Land...
March 2, 2025 at 12:42 PM
Reminds me of one of one my favourite tree photos taken about 20 years ago, before it became famous from the game of thrones hisdancingleg.com/gallery/Land...
Nearly didn’t get round to a portrait this week. But I just managed to squeeze this in within the last hour. I’m sure you’ll appreciate it.
March 1, 2025 at 6:56 PM
Nearly didn’t get round to a portrait this week. But I just managed to squeeze this in within the last hour. I’m sure you’ll appreciate it.
Nearly didn’t get round to a portrait this week. But I just managed to squeeze this in within the last hour. I’m sure you’ll appreciate it.
February 28, 2025 at 7:00 PM
Nearly didn’t get round to a portrait this week. But I just managed to squeeze this in within the last hour. I’m sure you’ll appreciate it.
I’m just exhausted listening to the news this week, it’s relentless gobshittery all round.
So here’s a portrait of a non gobshite to cleanse your palette.
So here’s a portrait of a non gobshite to cleanse your palette.
February 21, 2025 at 7:01 PM
I’m just exhausted listening to the news this week, it’s relentless gobshittery all round.
So here’s a portrait of a non gobshite to cleanse your palette.
So here’s a portrait of a non gobshite to cleanse your palette.