Cool Hand Luka
@coolhandluka.bsky.social
Someone is gonna have to hold my hand through this shit
finally, a place to buy shoes like the ones they have on Broadway, a street most famous for its shoe shopping
November 22, 2025 at 5:16 PM
finally, a place to buy shoes like the ones they have on Broadway, a street most famous for its shoe shopping
shoutout to the couple enjoying dinner in a Costco aisle (?) while sitting in the display office chairs (??) and putting their hot dogs directly atop the products on the shelf (???)
November 5, 2025 at 12:22 AM
shoutout to the couple enjoying dinner in a Costco aisle (?) while sitting in the display office chairs (??) and putting their hot dogs directly atop the products on the shelf (???)
carving jack-o-lanterns with two kids who are *very* particular about their designs while I have a sinus infection, what could possibly go wrong
October 29, 2025 at 12:43 AM
carving jack-o-lanterns with two kids who are *very* particular about their designs while I have a sinus infection, what could possibly go wrong
go Mariners, if you ask me
October 17, 2025 at 9:48 PM
go Mariners, if you ask me
we’re scrimmaging, bitches
October 3, 2025 at 12:07 AM
we’re scrimmaging, bitches
I’m not saying Jane Goodall fucked the chimps, but I *do* assume she could objectively recognize which ones were the sexy ones
October 1, 2025 at 9:46 PM
I’m not saying Jane Goodall fucked the chimps, but I *do* assume she could objectively recognize which ones were the sexy ones
meet me at the Costco corporate offices if you want an ass kicking
September 30, 2025 at 5:58 PM
meet me at the Costco corporate offices if you want an ass kicking
my son held up this tortilla and said “wow, this looks just like Dad’s back!” and it’s unquestionably the hardest I’ve ever been owned
July 24, 2025 at 1:41 AM
my son held up this tortilla and said “wow, this looks just like Dad’s back!” and it’s unquestionably the hardest I’ve ever been owned
I helped my kids clean their rooms the other day while we listened to some rock playlist.
I left the room for a couple minutes while the playlist was going and uh long story short my kids are diehard System of a Down fans now
I left the room for a couple minutes while the playlist was going and uh long story short my kids are diehard System of a Down fans now
July 17, 2025 at 2:36 AM
I helped my kids clean their rooms the other day while we listened to some rock playlist.
I left the room for a couple minutes while the playlist was going and uh long story short my kids are diehard System of a Down fans now
I left the room for a couple minutes while the playlist was going and uh long story short my kids are diehard System of a Down fans now
Come to the Redmond Derby Days bike parade if you want to get your ass kicked in front of a thousand horrified children
July 12, 2025 at 5:32 PM
Come to the Redmond Derby Days bike parade if you want to get your ass kicked in front of a thousand horrified children
been in Kansas for less than an hour and my brother is already peeing off the highway in a field of tall grass, talk about tapping into your roots
July 3, 2025 at 9:44 PM
been in Kansas for less than an hour and my brother is already peeing off the highway in a field of tall grass, talk about tapping into your roots
shoutout to the, uh, “forward-thinking” strip club employee who gave my kindergartner a baseball outside the Mariners game
July 3, 2025 at 1:34 AM
shoutout to the, uh, “forward-thinking” strip club employee who gave my kindergartner a baseball outside the Mariners game
Once again, I foolishly believed my kids when they told me they were starving.
Lmk if anyone wants half of a fish sandwich or most of a hot dog
Lmk if anyone wants half of a fish sandwich or most of a hot dog
June 28, 2025 at 9:12 PM
Once again, I foolishly believed my kids when they told me they were starving.
Lmk if anyone wants half of a fish sandwich or most of a hot dog
Lmk if anyone wants half of a fish sandwich or most of a hot dog
Killer road trip to @taylorshellfish.bsky.social with my dad and son today. 90° and nary a cloud in the sky.
Kid ate 9 oysters, 3 geoducks, and a comical amount of ice cream. Poor bastard is gonna have the gnarliest shits tonight.
Kid ate 9 oysters, 3 geoducks, and a comical amount of ice cream. Poor bastard is gonna have the gnarliest shits tonight.
June 9, 2025 at 1:50 AM
Killer road trip to @taylorshellfish.bsky.social with my dad and son today. 90° and nary a cloud in the sky.
Kid ate 9 oysters, 3 geoducks, and a comical amount of ice cream. Poor bastard is gonna have the gnarliest shits tonight.
Kid ate 9 oysters, 3 geoducks, and a comical amount of ice cream. Poor bastard is gonna have the gnarliest shits tonight.
Either Spitz just introduced jumbo size bags of dill pickle seeds, or the jumbo size bags of dill pickle seeds finally made their way to Seattle.
In either case, my spirits are soaring as high as my sodium levels.
In either case, my spirits are soaring as high as my sodium levels.
June 6, 2025 at 11:47 PM
Either Spitz just introduced jumbo size bags of dill pickle seeds, or the jumbo size bags of dill pickle seeds finally made their way to Seattle.
In either case, my spirits are soaring as high as my sodium levels.
In either case, my spirits are soaring as high as my sodium levels.
Elon’s ketamine guy is about to become the second-richest person in the world
June 5, 2025 at 8:31 PM
Elon’s ketamine guy is about to become the second-richest person in the world
[Dos Equis guy voice] I don’t always cook dinner, but when I do, it takes way longer than it should
June 2, 2025 at 1:09 AM
[Dos Equis guy voice] I don’t always cook dinner, but when I do, it takes way longer than it should
helluva day for strawberry picking
June 1, 2025 at 6:37 PM
helluva day for strawberry picking
going to the tide pools today and I’m fully expecting to get so swept up in the excitement that I’ll neglect my children at some point
May 26, 2025 at 4:35 PM
going to the tide pools today and I’m fully expecting to get so swept up in the excitement that I’ll neglect my children at some point
My son’s preschool class brought home butterfly kits with two caterpillars in each kit. Pretty much every kid’s caterpillars liquified within days, so all the parents got to have fun conversations about death.
May 26, 2025 at 1:37 AM
My son’s preschool class brought home butterfly kits with two caterpillars in each kit. Pretty much every kid’s caterpillars liquified within days, so all the parents got to have fun conversations about death.
sir are you implying you fucked my dog?
May 24, 2025 at 10:50 PM
sir are you implying you fucked my dog?
In addition to being a fantastic actor, I think Jim Beaver deserves a ton of credit for looking like his last name
May 16, 2025 at 11:55 PM
In addition to being a fantastic actor, I think Jim Beaver deserves a ton of credit for looking like his last name
all three are higher in antioxidants and dietary fiber than you might think!
May 16, 2025 at 7:41 PM
all three are higher in antioxidants and dietary fiber than you might think!
there’s being online-pilled, and then there’s announcing to all your facebook friends that your grandpa was killed by his rotting dick
May 16, 2025 at 4:17 PM
there’s being online-pilled, and then there’s announcing to all your facebook friends that your grandpa was killed by his rotting dick
at a timeshare presentation, how many should I buy?
May 8, 2025 at 1:27 AM
at a timeshare presentation, how many should I buy?