𝖌𝖗𝖊𝖌𝖌 𝖒𝖊𝖓 𝖙𝖊𝖑𝖑 𝖓𝖔 𝖙𝖆𝖑𝖊𝖘
@clinteldorado.bsky.social
the pope of hudson county.
the future belongs to the physical media loyalists. fuck streaming.
one, two, one two fuck you.
the future belongs to the physical media loyalists. fuck streaming.
one, two, one two fuck you.
Nineteen. 25 minutes again.
That was fucking difficult, that. Think I took too long a break (the weather’s been shite).
That was fucking difficult, that. Think I took too long a break (the weather’s been shite).
December 8, 2025 at 2:47 PM
Nineteen. 25 minutes again.
That was fucking difficult, that. Think I took too long a break (the weather’s been shite).
That was fucking difficult, that. Think I took too long a break (the weather’s been shite).
I attribute reviews like that to record company payola. knew something was fishy with that when a) I heard the album myself and b) this appeared in the mag the very next week.
Ray Zell obviously didn’t get a cut of the cheque.
Ray Zell obviously didn’t get a cut of the cheque.
December 8, 2025 at 2:10 PM
I attribute reviews like that to record company payola. knew something was fishy with that when a) I heard the album myself and b) this appeared in the mag the very next week.
Ray Zell obviously didn’t get a cut of the cheque.
Ray Zell obviously didn’t get a cut of the cheque.
BONUS: On the same page Kyuss’ flawed-but-pretty-good Wretch is mauled by Dave Reynolds. Once again they give the LP to a guy guaranteed to despise it: what could a man who loves Kiss and Skid Row possibly see in Kyuss?
Predictably, by Blues for the Red Sun the mag was licking the band’s arseholes.
Predictably, by Blues for the Red Sun the mag was licking the band’s arseholes.
December 8, 2025 at 12:43 PM
BONUS: On the same page Kyuss’ flawed-but-pretty-good Wretch is mauled by Dave Reynolds. Once again they give the LP to a guy guaranteed to despise it: what could a man who loves Kiss and Skid Row possibly see in Kyuss?
Predictably, by Blues for the Red Sun the mag was licking the band’s arseholes.
Predictably, by Blues for the Red Sun the mag was licking the band’s arseholes.
Last bit of alt text:
December 8, 2025 at 12:37 PM
Last bit of alt text:
Today’s instalment of Shit Kerrang! Got Wrong: Jesus Christ Poseurs
Soundgarden’s bullet-proof 1991 breakthrough album Badmotorfinger is shat on by a woefully out-of-touch Chris Watts. He compares the band unfavourably to Leatherface, Soul Asylum, and Love/Hate. The times they were a-changin’.
Soundgarden’s bullet-proof 1991 breakthrough album Badmotorfinger is shat on by a woefully out-of-touch Chris Watts. He compares the band unfavourably to Leatherface, Soul Asylum, and Love/Hate. The times they were a-changin’.
December 8, 2025 at 12:37 PM
Today’s instalment of Shit Kerrang! Got Wrong: Jesus Christ Poseurs
Soundgarden’s bullet-proof 1991 breakthrough album Badmotorfinger is shat on by a woefully out-of-touch Chris Watts. He compares the band unfavourably to Leatherface, Soul Asylum, and Love/Hate. The times they were a-changin’.
Soundgarden’s bullet-proof 1991 breakthrough album Badmotorfinger is shat on by a woefully out-of-touch Chris Watts. He compares the band unfavourably to Leatherface, Soul Asylum, and Love/Hate. The times they were a-changin’.
Last week’s sounds.
December 8, 2025 at 12:25 PM
Last week’s sounds.
Years ago I got temp banned from Twitter for posting the lyrics of the fifth song on this album – and that was BEFORE the Nazi Boer took over.
December 8, 2025 at 12:51 AM
Years ago I got temp banned from Twitter for posting the lyrics of the fifth song on this album – and that was BEFORE the Nazi Boer took over.
Cleansing myself of that shit Machine Head album – and of the shit Type O Negative album from earlier in the week – with something that’s been a favourite for nearly 25 years.
God, I love this album. Only up to the second chorus of “Christian Woman” and I’ve already got goosebumps.
God, I love this album. Only up to the second chorus of “Christian Woman” and I’ve already got goosebumps.
December 8, 2025 at 12:32 AM
Cleansing myself of that shit Machine Head album – and of the shit Type O Negative album from earlier in the week – with something that’s been a favourite for nearly 25 years.
God, I love this album. Only up to the second chorus of “Christian Woman” and I’ve already got goosebumps.
God, I love this album. Only up to the second chorus of “Christian Woman” and I’ve already got goosebumps.
Film you’ve seen more than six times. Hard mode: no Stars (neither Wars nor Trek), Lord of the Rings or Marvel.
December 8, 2025 at 12:00 AM
Film you’ve seen more than six times. Hard mode: no Stars (neither Wars nor Trek), Lord of the Rings or Marvel.
And they’ve done it again with the reissue of Thirst!
Wankers.
Wankers.
December 7, 2025 at 2:31 PM
And they’ve done it again with the reissue of Thirst!
Wankers.
Wankers.
Tankard become the latest metal band to give themselves over to AI slop, with this disgraceful new cover “art” for their remaster of The Beauty and the Beer. Pathetic.
December 7, 2025 at 2:28 PM
Tankard become the latest metal band to give themselves over to AI slop, with this disgraceful new cover “art” for their remaster of The Beauty and the Beer. Pathetic.
Today’s instalment of Shit Kerrang! Got Wrong: Altars of Badness
Morbid Angel’s 1993 classic Covenant gets a 1/5 burial from Neil Perry. One can only assume Dig from Earache stole his dinner money or something.
Neil also manages to mix up death metal and black metal at the end. Way to go, dude.
Morbid Angel’s 1993 classic Covenant gets a 1/5 burial from Neil Perry. One can only assume Dig from Earache stole his dinner money or something.
Neil also manages to mix up death metal and black metal at the end. Way to go, dude.
December 7, 2025 at 2:12 AM
Today’s instalment of Shit Kerrang! Got Wrong: Altars of Badness
Morbid Angel’s 1993 classic Covenant gets a 1/5 burial from Neil Perry. One can only assume Dig from Earache stole his dinner money or something.
Neil also manages to mix up death metal and black metal at the end. Way to go, dude.
Morbid Angel’s 1993 classic Covenant gets a 1/5 burial from Neil Perry. One can only assume Dig from Earache stole his dinner money or something.
Neil also manages to mix up death metal and black metal at the end. Way to go, dude.
So it wasn’t just the racism and sexism that made the 4chan crowd rally behind him.
December 6, 2025 at 4:02 AM
So it wasn’t just the racism and sexism that made the 4chan crowd rally behind him.
If you see this, quote with your model of positive masculinity:
December 5, 2025 at 8:40 PM
If you see this, quote with your model of positive masculinity:
If album covers told the truth: Iron Maiden edition
December 3, 2025 at 11:47 AM
If album covers told the truth: Iron Maiden edition
Eighteen. 25 minutes nonstop.
Felt good about that. Energy and motivation no doubt boosted by the blood pressure revelation today.
Felt good about that. Energy and motivation no doubt boosted by the blood pressure revelation today.
December 2, 2025 at 11:11 PM
Eighteen. 25 minutes nonstop.
Felt good about that. Energy and motivation no doubt boosted by the blood pressure revelation today.
Felt good about that. Energy and motivation no doubt boosted by the blood pressure revelation today.
Jesus Christ!
December 2, 2025 at 9:27 PM
Jesus Christ!
This – and if you listen to it you’ll think it’s the best album of 2025 too (because it is)
December 1, 2025 at 11:35 PM
This – and if you listen to it you’ll think it’s the best album of 2025 too (because it is)
The last of the Panzerfaust posts.
![gregg men tell no tales @clinteldorado... • 3mo
Fenriz was wrong: my heart certainly doesn't call for *this* Canadian metal.
gregg men tell no tales @clinteldorado... • 3mo
Onto the third album.
Wonderful news: it opens with a ten-minute song.
[image of Alan Davies off QI with his hand covering his eyes]
Oh, for God's sake...
gregg men tell no tales @clinteldorado... • 3mо
At least I'm officially over halfway through this bullshit assignment.
gregg men tell no tales @clinteldorado... • 3mо
You know how "Kathaarian Life Code" is ten minutes long but it's so good it flies by like a three-minute pop song? This is not that.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:pnggjx72d7m4xrdd3dcye3sq/bafkreib67lppnwe7re3knoxlmxry4j55ydcgqdn7hajekqe4tq7fedaxaa@jpeg)
![gregg men tell no tales @clinteldorado... • 3mо
CHRIST, there's still two more tracks to go?
Hurry it along, you pricks!
Oh, for crying out loud.
[an image of the track’s runtime: 10:11]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:pnggjx72d7m4xrdd3dcye3sq/bafkreih4s5vqnkb44ajweq2aqu642txjazlpnihhamkyet46xe7rgkhmkq@jpeg)
December 1, 2025 at 10:28 PM
The last of the Panzerfaust posts.
What follows are my posts about said records. Deadguy first.
The Panzerfaust posts are especially scathing because I’d just come off a fortnight of listening to nothing but Black Sabbath and Ozzy Osbourne, so I was in no mood for substandard metal.
The Panzerfaust posts are especially scathing because I’d just come off a fortnight of listening to nothing but Black Sabbath and Ozzy Osbourne, so I was in no mood for substandard metal.
![gregg men tell no tales @clinteldorado... • 3mо
I've had a mate on at me for a while to listen to Panzerfaust's four Suns of Perdition albums. I'm onto the first track of the second one now. Are they always this boring? This is doing absolutely nothing for me.
gregg men tell no tales @clinteldorado... • 3mо
Oh wow, 45 minutes into this four-album cycle I finally find an interesting riff. Maybe by the time I get to the end of the fourth album they'll have enough for an entire song.
gregg men tell no tales @clinteldorado... • 3mo
Maybe this is what happens when you go from spending two weeks listening to nothing but one of the most important artists in the history of metal, to listening to a set of dickheads pulling silly faces while covered in shite.
[image of Panzerfaust: a set of dickheads pulling silly faces while covered in shite]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:pnggjx72d7m4xrdd3dcye3sq/bafkreiehkbb4lenfi74bw3ribhdntatifcqtfa32muxedvse6f5lovekby@jpeg)
![gregg men tell no tales @clinteldorado... • 3mо
Another half-decent riff. Only half, mind you.
[picture of Professor Frink and his team working on Mr. Burns’ seventeen stab wounds in the back]
WELL, WE'RE UP TO TWO!
(ALL CHEERING)
gregg men tell no tales @clinteldorado... • 3mо
Worst thing is, these knobs are playing Damnation in November. Hopefully there's someone decent on another stage at the time, otherwise it looks like I'll be spending 45 minutes stood in the merch tent.
gregg men tell no tales @clinteldorado... • 3mо
Oh boy, unintelligible samples of somebody speaking, because you didn't completely overuse that shite on the last album.
I apologise if I'm coming off as overly negative.
I've been ill and in a lousy mood all day and this pretentious rubbish isn't helping.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:pnggjx72d7m4xrdd3dcye3sq/bafkreibbvg2kvu4ykcr364yg3o47eah22uvvrpcrvjtugyecermy2gilue@jpeg)
December 1, 2025 at 10:28 PM
What follows are my posts about said records. Deadguy first.
The Panzerfaust posts are especially scathing because I’d just come off a fortnight of listening to nothing but Black Sabbath and Ozzy Osbourne, so I was in no mood for substandard metal.
The Panzerfaust posts are especially scathing because I’d just come off a fortnight of listening to nothing but Black Sabbath and Ozzy Osbourne, so I was in no mood for substandard metal.
The Funko people are trying to pass this off as Kirk Hammett when it’s clearly Alex Skolnick out of Testament.
December 1, 2025 at 10:35 AM
The Funko people are trying to pass this off as Kirk Hammett when it’s clearly Alex Skolnick out of Testament.
Last week’s sounds.
December 1, 2025 at 9:06 AM
Last week’s sounds.
Today’s second instalment of Shit Kerrang! Got Wrong: King Diamond reissues
With Kerrang! always more concerned with what was cool than what was good, this is no surprise: 1997 remasters of the King’s very best material get absolutely slaughtered by Dave Everley. “Pansticked pillock”? Cheeky cunt.
With Kerrang! always more concerned with what was cool than what was good, this is no surprise: 1997 remasters of the King’s very best material get absolutely slaughtered by Dave Everley. “Pansticked pillock”? Cheeky cunt.
November 29, 2025 at 9:19 PM
Today’s second instalment of Shit Kerrang! Got Wrong: King Diamond reissues
With Kerrang! always more concerned with what was cool than what was good, this is no surprise: 1997 remasters of the King’s very best material get absolutely slaughtered by Dave Everley. “Pansticked pillock”? Cheeky cunt.
With Kerrang! always more concerned with what was cool than what was good, this is no surprise: 1997 remasters of the King’s very best material get absolutely slaughtered by Dave Everley. “Pansticked pillock”? Cheeky cunt.
BONUS: an advert promoting the next Type O album October Rust, with the band’s trademark self-deprecating humour on display.
November 29, 2025 at 2:23 PM
BONUS: an advert promoting the next Type O album October Rust, with the band’s trademark self-deprecating humour on display.
Today’s instalment of Shit Kerrang! Got Wrong: Type O Average
One of Peter Steele’s two undisputed masterpieces gets a mere 3/5 review from future K! editor Jason Arnopp, who describes the album as “long… and hardly enthralling”.
I imagine the band themselves, at least, would call that generous.
One of Peter Steele’s two undisputed masterpieces gets a mere 3/5 review from future K! editor Jason Arnopp, who describes the album as “long… and hardly enthralling”.
I imagine the band themselves, at least, would call that generous.
November 29, 2025 at 2:19 PM
Today’s instalment of Shit Kerrang! Got Wrong: Type O Average
One of Peter Steele’s two undisputed masterpieces gets a mere 3/5 review from future K! editor Jason Arnopp, who describes the album as “long… and hardly enthralling”.
I imagine the band themselves, at least, would call that generous.
One of Peter Steele’s two undisputed masterpieces gets a mere 3/5 review from future K! editor Jason Arnopp, who describes the album as “long… and hardly enthralling”.
I imagine the band themselves, at least, would call that generous.