Claire 🐦🔥
@clairejphoenix.bsky.social
I really should be getting paid six figures to be this beautiful and funny and talented and esoteric and artistic and smart and witty and hot
February 8, 2025 at 8:10 AM
I really should be getting paid six figures to be this beautiful and funny and talented and esoteric and artistic and smart and witty and hot
Weighed myself before and after taking a shit and it was literally a ten pound difference 😭
February 8, 2025 at 7:26 AM
Weighed myself before and after taking a shit and it was literally a ten pound difference 😭
Never once have I ever heard the “not all men” crowd defend male ducks for being the reason that female ducks have corkscrew-shaped cloaca’s. Just a thought.
February 7, 2025 at 3:54 AM
Never once have I ever heard the “not all men” crowd defend male ducks for being the reason that female ducks have corkscrew-shaped cloaca’s. Just a thought.
I let the intrusive thoughts win today (ate a whole jar of pickled ghost peppers)
February 5, 2025 at 8:36 PM
I let the intrusive thoughts win today (ate a whole jar of pickled ghost peppers)
Tip for Americans: get your ass on Duolingo and start learning Chinese or Spanish ASAP.
February 5, 2025 at 6:25 PM
Tip for Americans: get your ass on Duolingo and start learning Chinese or Spanish ASAP.
Reposted by Claire 🐦🔥
people, the new administration is a) completely unconcerned with the actual law and b) very online
please stop posting about the crimes you want to commit, especially in my replies
your opsec is not as good as you think it is if they decide to go after you for whatever reason
please stop posting about the crimes you want to commit, especially in my replies
your opsec is not as good as you think it is if they decide to go after you for whatever reason
February 4, 2025 at 5:07 PM
people, the new administration is a) completely unconcerned with the actual law and b) very online
please stop posting about the crimes you want to commit, especially in my replies
your opsec is not as good as you think it is if they decide to go after you for whatever reason
please stop posting about the crimes you want to commit, especially in my replies
your opsec is not as good as you think it is if they decide to go after you for whatever reason
If Taylor Lorenz has zero fans, I am dead
February 4, 2025 at 5:45 PM
If Taylor Lorenz has zero fans, I am dead
America is a scary place right now, but what’s even scarier is losing yourself. Nothing you can take from me was ever worth keeping!!!!
February 4, 2025 at 5:43 PM
America is a scary place right now, but what’s even scarier is losing yourself. Nothing you can take from me was ever worth keeping!!!!
Reposted by Claire 🐦🔥
Reposted by Claire 🐦🔥
Crockett: “I’m tired of the white tears. If you’re competent you’re not concerned. When you compare me to Greene/Boebert there’s no comparison… The only ppl crying are mediocre white boys beaten out by people that had to work much harder.”
Full: www.instagram.com/reel/DFp8K0M...
Full: www.instagram.com/reel/DFp8K0M...
February 4, 2025 at 3:08 PM
Crockett: “I’m tired of the white tears. If you’re competent you’re not concerned. When you compare me to Greene/Boebert there’s no comparison… The only ppl crying are mediocre white boys beaten out by people that had to work much harder.”
Full: www.instagram.com/reel/DFp8K0M...
Full: www.instagram.com/reel/DFp8K0M...
WHY IS THERE A 69 EMOJI???? ♋️ LIKE BE SO FR
February 4, 2025 at 5:37 PM
WHY IS THERE A 69 EMOJI???? ♋️ LIKE BE SO FR
Reposted by Claire 🐦🔥
NEW - Nashville Predators fans booed the Canadian national anthem tonight. And then got crushed by the Ottawa Senators on the ice. Go Sens Go.
February 4, 2025 at 3:35 AM
NEW - Nashville Predators fans booed the Canadian national anthem tonight. And then got crushed by the Ottawa Senators on the ice. Go Sens Go.
Alright yall say it with me: There’s not a single person who dislikes me who I would trade places with
February 3, 2025 at 5:13 AM
Alright yall say it with me: There’s not a single person who dislikes me who I would trade places with
Reposted by Claire 🐦🔥
February 1, 2025 at 9:25 PM
Reposted by Claire 🐦🔥
A little good news. Three weeks later.
The Los Angeles Wildfires Are Fully Contained www.nytimes.com/2025/02/01/u...
The Los Angeles Wildfires Are Fully Contained www.nytimes.com/2025/02/01/u...
Palisades and Eaton Fires Are Fully Contained
The Palisades and Eaton fires, two of the deadliest and most destructive wildfires in California history, reached 100 percent containment more than three weeks after they began.
www.nytimes.com
February 1, 2025 at 12:01 PM
A little good news. Three weeks later.
The Los Angeles Wildfires Are Fully Contained www.nytimes.com/2025/02/01/u...
The Los Angeles Wildfires Are Fully Contained www.nytimes.com/2025/02/01/u...
Reposted by Claire 🐦🔥
our nation has a Kennedy missing his brain and now a white man from Dallas is about to help LBJ win. welcome back, 1963
February 2, 2025 at 5:48 AM
our nation has a Kennedy missing his brain and now a white man from Dallas is about to help LBJ win. welcome back, 1963
I hope the Not See’s realize their economy is on the precipice of cataclysmic collapse
February 2, 2025 at 12:00 PM
I hope the Not See’s realize their economy is on the precipice of cataclysmic collapse
I always accept cookies when I use websites because… mmmmm cookies :3
February 2, 2025 at 11:57 AM
I always accept cookies when I use websites because… mmmmm cookies :3
Chiefs vs. the Eagles is the perfect Super Bowl right now. Incredible reflection of the state of America
February 2, 2025 at 4:49 AM
Chiefs vs. the Eagles is the perfect Super Bowl right now. Incredible reflection of the state of America
War is incredibly gay if you think about it. A whole bunch of muscly guys standing around in a field together, sweaty and full of passion is so zesty
February 2, 2025 at 4:46 AM
War is incredibly gay if you think about it. A whole bunch of muscly guys standing around in a field together, sweaty and full of passion is so zesty
Reposted by Claire 🐦🔥
Saw this on Reddit the other day and i keep looking at it for some reason
January 30, 2025 at 3:43 PM
Saw this on Reddit the other day and i keep looking at it for some reason
A tarot card deck but it’s football themed and the Devil card is the KC Chiefs and The Fool is Jerry Jones
January 31, 2025 at 9:05 AM
A tarot card deck but it’s football themed and the Devil card is the KC Chiefs and The Fool is Jerry Jones
Completely random things that are red flags to me 🧵
January 26, 2025 at 12:31 PM
Completely random things that are red flags to me 🧵