Maya
@cincodemaya.bsky.social
Unhappily procrastinating. Graceful as a penguin out of water.
So the moral of the story is don’t (do) send the 7.5 month pregnant person into the bakery if you don’t (do) want to be drowning in pastries.
October 16, 2025 at 9:12 PM
So the moral of the story is don’t (do) send the 7.5 month pregnant person into the bakery if you don’t (do) want to be drowning in pastries.
Rosie want boop.
Give Rosie boop.
Give Rosie boop.
October 14, 2025 at 3:56 PM
Rosie want boop.
Give Rosie boop.
Give Rosie boop.
Every Swiftie is having the exact same conversation right now.
August 26, 2025 at 5:35 PM
Every Swiftie is having the exact same conversation right now.
<has been experiencing distressing round ligament pain for three weeks now>
OH REALLY PREGNANCY APP?? IS THAT AN INTERESTING FACT?! WOW ITS SO INTERESTING THAT I MIGHT FEEL MORE TENSION THERE! THANKS 🥲🥲🥲
OH REALLY PREGNANCY APP?? IS THAT AN INTERESTING FACT?! WOW ITS SO INTERESTING THAT I MIGHT FEEL MORE TENSION THERE! THANKS 🥲🥲🥲
August 20, 2025 at 8:56 PM
<has been experiencing distressing round ligament pain for three weeks now>
OH REALLY PREGNANCY APP?? IS THAT AN INTERESTING FACT?! WOW ITS SO INTERESTING THAT I MIGHT FEEL MORE TENSION THERE! THANKS 🥲🥲🥲
OH REALLY PREGNANCY APP?? IS THAT AN INTERESTING FACT?! WOW ITS SO INTERESTING THAT I MIGHT FEEL MORE TENSION THERE! THANKS 🥲🥲🥲
Very important news: This goat is wearing a hat.
August 20, 2025 at 7:26 PM
Very important news: This goat is wearing a hat.
I give it ten days before they pull an HBO max/go/now/plus and revert.
August 18, 2025 at 3:08 PM
I give it ten days before they pull an HBO max/go/now/plus and revert.
Beach dog is on shark lookout
August 16, 2025 at 7:11 PM
Beach dog is on shark lookout
My mother knows me so well
August 13, 2025 at 12:37 AM
My mother knows me so well
19 hours
2 trains
2 planes
1 automobile later
We are home
And my plants aren’t dead!
2 trains
2 planes
1 automobile later
We are home
And my plants aren’t dead!
August 10, 2025 at 10:41 PM
19 hours
2 trains
2 planes
1 automobile later
We are home
And my plants aren’t dead!
2 trains
2 planes
1 automobile later
We are home
And my plants aren’t dead!
This vending machine is dropping the sickest beats of 2025
August 10, 2025 at 9:17 AM
This vending machine is dropping the sickest beats of 2025
Why yes, Fenway park in the middle of a Sox game is the perfect time and place to finish Sunrise on the Reaping.
July 13, 2025 at 5:48 PM
Why yes, Fenway park in the middle of a Sox game is the perfect time and place to finish Sunrise on the Reaping.
Boo spelling bee. Boo I say!
July 12, 2025 at 5:04 PM
Boo spelling bee. Boo I say!
Bitches be like “nah this is the room w the AC we’re not moving”
July 7, 2025 at 1:42 PM
Bitches be like “nah this is the room w the AC we’re not moving”
What’s worse: peeling a croissant or scooping a bagel
June 25, 2025 at 6:55 PM
What’s worse: peeling a croissant or scooping a bagel
Vote for Rosie to be the next pope.
April 21, 2025 at 2:56 PM
Vote for Rosie to be the next pope.
The face of someone who has no idea what a tariff or 401k is
April 4, 2025 at 4:41 PM
The face of someone who has no idea what a tariff or 401k is
The joys of living in Boston.
Listen someone’s gotta show the cars they’re not on the top of the food chain.
Listen someone’s gotta show the cars they’re not on the top of the food chain.
March 26, 2025 at 9:07 PM
The joys of living in Boston.
Listen someone’s gotta show the cars they’re not on the top of the food chain.
Listen someone’s gotta show the cars they’re not on the top of the food chain.
It’s a good day when there’s office tiramisù
March 6, 2025 at 7:15 PM
It’s a good day when there’s office tiramisù
Honestly proud of myself for getting it this low.
February 23, 2025 at 2:53 PM
Honestly proud of myself for getting it this low.
Sometimes I look at my snuggly teddy bear of a Golden Retriever and think “you used to be a wolf.”
February 6, 2025 at 3:20 PM
Sometimes I look at my snuggly teddy bear of a Golden Retriever and think “you used to be a wolf.”
More like booooooopa amirite
February 4, 2025 at 2:55 PM
More like booooooopa amirite
The yearning and tension between these two books is palpable.
February 2, 2025 at 9:02 PM
The yearning and tension between these two books is palpable.
Now that the Superb Owl is set I can share a sample of the slides I put together for my dad so that he'll shut the fuck up and let people watch the halftime show.
#superbowl #superbowlLIX #superbowl2025 #halftimeshow #superbowlhalftimeshow
#superbowl #superbowlLIX #superbowl2025 #halftimeshow #superbowlhalftimeshow
January 27, 2025 at 2:51 AM
Now that the Superb Owl is set I can share a sample of the slides I put together for my dad so that he'll shut the fuck up and let people watch the halftime show.
#superbowl #superbowlLIX #superbowl2025 #halftimeshow #superbowlhalftimeshow
#superbowl #superbowlLIX #superbowl2025 #halftimeshow #superbowlhalftimeshow