Rob H.
@captainrandom10.bsky.social
Travels a lot and writes books. Two dark comedies in the 'Assassins' Social Club' series and three hilarious 'Six Idiots' novels out now on Amazon https://sixidiots.wixsite.com/books Also... #lufc
Pinned
Rob H.
@captainrandom10.bsky.social
· Nov 17
Today is my birthday.🎊 I'm celebrating it in Berlin. 🇩🇪If you buy my books as a birthday gift to yourselves, they will make you laugh out loud and that will make me smile. 😊
Which would be the best birthday present ever. (Well, aside from a Ferrari, a yacht and a supermodel).
Which would be the best birthday present ever. (Well, aside from a Ferrari, a yacht and a supermodel).
July 22, 2025 at 9:19 PM
Today is my birthday.🎊 I'm celebrating it in Berlin. 🇩🇪If you buy my books as a birthday gift to yourselves, they will make you laugh out loud and that will make me smile. 😊
Which would be the best birthday present ever. (Well, aside from a Ferrari, a yacht and a supermodel).
Which would be the best birthday present ever. (Well, aside from a Ferrari, a yacht and a supermodel).
The paperback is now out in the wild 📔
Murder! Mystery! Intrigue! Friendship! Incompetence! Homicidal monkeys! 😂
www.amazon.co.uk/Assassins-So...
Murder! Mystery! Intrigue! Friendship! Incompetence! Homicidal monkeys! 😂
www.amazon.co.uk/Assassins-So...
July 7, 2025 at 3:18 PM
The paperback is now out in the wild 📔
Murder! Mystery! Intrigue! Friendship! Incompetence! Homicidal monkeys! 😂
www.amazon.co.uk/Assassins-So...
Murder! Mystery! Intrigue! Friendship! Incompetence! Homicidal monkeys! 😂
www.amazon.co.uk/Assassins-So...
Dear "book marketing experts" 🙄
Did you know....?
When you go into somebody's DMs and start a conversation that leads to, 'I can help you market your book if you pay me'.....from the other person's perspective you're just a stranger on the internet asking for money.
Did you know....?
When you go into somebody's DMs and start a conversation that leads to, 'I can help you market your book if you pay me'.....from the other person's perspective you're just a stranger on the internet asking for money.
July 7, 2025 at 1:57 PM
Dear "book marketing experts" 🙄
Did you know....?
When you go into somebody's DMs and start a conversation that leads to, 'I can help you market your book if you pay me'.....from the other person's perspective you're just a stranger on the internet asking for money.
Did you know....?
When you go into somebody's DMs and start a conversation that leads to, 'I can help you market your book if you pay me'.....from the other person's perspective you're just a stranger on the internet asking for money.
Does anyone else wish they could get in a time machine and go back to the 1980s to run a multi level marketing scheme and make lots of money off of unsuspecting fools?
Nobody?
Awesome...no competition😁
In unrelated news, has anybody got a time machine they can lend me? 😁
Nobody?
Awesome...no competition😁
In unrelated news, has anybody got a time machine they can lend me? 😁
July 7, 2025 at 12:46 PM
Does anyone else wish they could get in a time machine and go back to the 1980s to run a multi level marketing scheme and make lots of money off of unsuspecting fools?
Nobody?
Awesome...no competition😁
In unrelated news, has anybody got a time machine they can lend me? 😁
Nobody?
Awesome...no competition😁
In unrelated news, has anybody got a time machine they can lend me? 😁
You can tell how useful you are at work when you ask for time off - if the manager cries then you're indispensable.
I just booked a week off and they held a party. 😳😁
I just booked a week off and they held a party. 😳😁
July 7, 2025 at 12:44 PM
You can tell how useful you are at work when you ask for time off - if the manager cries then you're indispensable.
I just booked a week off and they held a party. 😳😁
I just booked a week off and they held a party. 😳😁
On today's 'In what world do you think your answer actually helps?'...
🤦♂️😂
🤦♂️😂
July 6, 2025 at 9:58 AM
On today's 'In what world do you think your answer actually helps?'...
🤦♂️😂
🤦♂️😂
There skeletons wearing hats in a bath on wheels...I see some strange things when I go for a walk 😁
July 6, 2025 at 9:32 AM
There skeletons wearing hats in a bath on wheels...I see some strange things when I go for a walk 😁
I have never been part of a starter pack on here 😨
Also, I've never gone around to anyone's house and rammed a copy of my new book up their arse because they haven't bought it yet 😁
I wonder which will happen first?
😂
Also, I've never gone around to anyone's house and rammed a copy of my new book up their arse because they haven't bought it yet 😁
I wonder which will happen first?
😂
July 6, 2025 at 8:51 AM
I have never been part of a starter pack on here 😨
Also, I've never gone around to anyone's house and rammed a copy of my new book up their arse because they haven't bought it yet 😁
I wonder which will happen first?
😂
Also, I've never gone around to anyone's house and rammed a copy of my new book up their arse because they haven't bought it yet 😁
I wonder which will happen first?
😂
Don't forget...as an adult you can buy yourself a large chocolate cake, take it home and eat it all by yourself in your PJs. No-one checks. 😊
July 4, 2025 at 11:04 PM
Don't forget...as an adult you can buy yourself a large chocolate cake, take it home and eat it all by yourself in your PJs. No-one checks. 😊
New job and I have no clue what I'm doing and lied on my CV...'fake it until you make it' they said, so let's give this a go 😁
"Flight AB125, you are cleared for take off. Or landing. Or you can just fly where you want. Over."
😳😂
"Flight AB125, you are cleared for take off. Or landing. Or you can just fly where you want. Over."
😳😂
July 4, 2025 at 9:50 AM
New job and I have no clue what I'm doing and lied on my CV...'fake it until you make it' they said, so let's give this a go 😁
"Flight AB125, you are cleared for take off. Or landing. Or you can just fly where you want. Over."
😳😂
"Flight AB125, you are cleared for take off. Or landing. Or you can just fly where you want. Over."
😳😂
I never thought I'd see the day when fish fingers were nearly £9 😳
July 3, 2025 at 3:03 PM
I never thought I'd see the day when fish fingers were nearly £9 😳
Dear Americans,
As you get ready to celebrate (?) 4th July tomorrow, it's not too late to come back to us. 😊
Our leaders might be incompetent, but at least they're not mean.
As you get ready to celebrate (?) 4th July tomorrow, it's not too late to come back to us. 😊
Our leaders might be incompetent, but at least they're not mean.
a man with a crown on his head and a cane
ALT: a man with a crown on his head and a cane
media.tenor.com
July 3, 2025 at 12:56 PM
Dear Americans,
As you get ready to celebrate (?) 4th July tomorrow, it's not too late to come back to us. 😊
Our leaders might be incompetent, but at least they're not mean.
As you get ready to celebrate (?) 4th July tomorrow, it's not too late to come back to us. 😊
Our leaders might be incompetent, but at least they're not mean.
The first review of my new book, 'The Assassins' Social Club 2'
"I loved reading it. Made me laugh out loud. Thank you, Rob. Very entertaining. I'm looking forward to The Assassins' Social Club #3, #4, and #5!"
If you want to laugh out loud...maybe you should buy it too?! 😊
"I loved reading it. Made me laugh out loud. Thank you, Rob. Very entertaining. I'm looking forward to The Assassins' Social Club #3, #4, and #5!"
If you want to laugh out loud...maybe you should buy it too?! 😊
July 2, 2025 at 2:21 PM
The first review of my new book, 'The Assassins' Social Club 2'
"I loved reading it. Made me laugh out loud. Thank you, Rob. Very entertaining. I'm looking forward to The Assassins' Social Club #3, #4, and #5!"
If you want to laugh out loud...maybe you should buy it too?! 😊
"I loved reading it. Made me laugh out loud. Thank you, Rob. Very entertaining. I'm looking forward to The Assassins' Social Club #3, #4, and #5!"
If you want to laugh out loud...maybe you should buy it too?! 😊
My new book is out today in paperback as well as Kindle.
Only buy it if you like escapism, laughter, warm characters, an interesting story...and homicidal monkeys.
😁
#booksky
Only buy it if you like escapism, laughter, warm characters, an interesting story...and homicidal monkeys.
😁
#booksky
June 30, 2025 at 3:03 PM
My new book is out today in paperback as well as Kindle.
Only buy it if you like escapism, laughter, warm characters, an interesting story...and homicidal monkeys.
😁
#booksky
Only buy it if you like escapism, laughter, warm characters, an interesting story...and homicidal monkeys.
😁
#booksky
A Trump supporter DM'd me on Twitter saying she got one of my books but didn't understand the humour 🤦♂️
Proof that my books are only for intelligent people
- Six Idiots Witness a Murder
- The Assassins Social Club
Laugh until your sides split (unless you're a Trumper) 😂
#booksky
#writingcommunity
Proof that my books are only for intelligent people
- Six Idiots Witness a Murder
- The Assassins Social Club
Laugh until your sides split (unless you're a Trumper) 😂
#booksky
#writingcommunity
June 30, 2025 at 10:47 AM
A Trump supporter DM'd me on Twitter saying she got one of my books but didn't understand the humour 🤦♂️
Proof that my books are only for intelligent people
- Six Idiots Witness a Murder
- The Assassins Social Club
Laugh until your sides split (unless you're a Trumper) 😂
#booksky
#writingcommunity
Proof that my books are only for intelligent people
- Six Idiots Witness a Murder
- The Assassins Social Club
Laugh until your sides split (unless you're a Trumper) 😂
#booksky
#writingcommunity
I don't like plants. There's something suspicious about them.
They can live and thrive forever when they're in the wild but as soon as you put them in your garden they're all like, 'water me!, give me expensive plant food!, keep me out of the sun!, now move me into the sun!'
Dodgy.
They can live and thrive forever when they're in the wild but as soon as you put them in your garden they're all like, 'water me!, give me expensive plant food!, keep me out of the sun!, now move me into the sun!'
Dodgy.
a pond with a few plants in it
ALT: a pond with a few plants in it
media.tenor.com
June 28, 2025 at 6:00 PM
I don't like plants. There's something suspicious about them.
They can live and thrive forever when they're in the wild but as soon as you put them in your garden they're all like, 'water me!, give me expensive plant food!, keep me out of the sun!, now move me into the sun!'
Dodgy.
They can live and thrive forever when they're in the wild but as soon as you put them in your garden they're all like, 'water me!, give me expensive plant food!, keep me out of the sun!, now move me into the sun!'
Dodgy.
I have just ended an email with the word "Regards" (without the 'kind' in front of it) to show the recipient how furious I am about their email.
😁
😁
June 25, 2025 at 2:19 PM
I have just ended an email with the word "Regards" (without the 'kind' in front of it) to show the recipient how furious I am about their email.
😁
😁
I'm beginning to think Bluesky has become Linkedin's slightly more serious cousin.
June 24, 2025 at 1:09 PM
I'm beginning to think Bluesky has become Linkedin's slightly more serious cousin.
Reposted by Rob H.
This came up in my reels a few days ago & I haven't been able to stop thinking about it
June 22, 2025 at 3:09 AM
This came up in my reels a few days ago & I haven't been able to stop thinking about it
I really want to be a billionaire, just like my dad.
He wants to be a billionaire too.
😁
He wants to be a billionaire too.
😁
June 23, 2025 at 1:26 PM
I really want to be a billionaire, just like my dad.
He wants to be a billionaire too.
😁
He wants to be a billionaire too.
😁
It's said that if you gave an infinite number of monkeys an infinite amount time they would eventually come up with the complete works of Shakespeare.
Why do monkeys hate us so much?! 😳🙈
Why do monkeys hate us so much?! 😳🙈
June 22, 2025 at 10:43 PM
It's said that if you gave an infinite number of monkeys an infinite amount time they would eventually come up with the complete works of Shakespeare.
Why do monkeys hate us so much?! 😳🙈
Why do monkeys hate us so much?! 😳🙈
Just remember to do your best every day 😊
We all know it's not good enough but at least you tried 😁
We all know it's not good enough but at least you tried 😁
June 22, 2025 at 10:42 PM
Just remember to do your best every day 😊
We all know it's not good enough but at least you tried 😁
We all know it's not good enough but at least you tried 😁
Here is your to-do list for today:
Make sure you have enough coffee
Get your shit together
Face the day with a weary smile
Slap the living crap out of anyone who gets in your way
😁
Make sure you have enough coffee
Get your shit together
Face the day with a weary smile
Slap the living crap out of anyone who gets in your way
😁
June 22, 2025 at 10:42 PM
Here is your to-do list for today:
Make sure you have enough coffee
Get your shit together
Face the day with a weary smile
Slap the living crap out of anyone who gets in your way
😁
Make sure you have enough coffee
Get your shit together
Face the day with a weary smile
Slap the living crap out of anyone who gets in your way
😁
Many French guillotine victims had their heads
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[Removed]
June 22, 2025 at 10:41 PM
Many French guillotine victims had their heads
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