Brandonomicon (Brandon Seifert)
@brandonseifert.info
Writer/storyteller in Portland, Oregon. In a past life I wrote "Witch Doctor" (Image), Hellraiser, Doctor Who, Godzilla, other comics. Spent the night in the Birdman's cell at Alcatraz.
https://brandonseifert.info | https://thewriterbrandonseifert.itch.io
https://brandonseifert.info | https://thewriterbrandonseifert.itch.io
This is who runs this account.
(No cats were harmed, etc. They were really chill about the whole thing!)
(No cats were harmed, etc. They were really chill about the whole thing!)
February 3, 2026 at 2:31 AM
This is who runs this account.
(No cats were harmed, etc. They were really chill about the whole thing!)
(No cats were harmed, etc. They were really chill about the whole thing!)
Seifert's Law: Any sufficiently-advanced creativity is indistinguishable from OMG THEY MUST BE ON DRUGS LOL to non-creatives.
February 2, 2026 at 10:26 AM
Seifert's Law: Any sufficiently-advanced creativity is indistinguishable from OMG THEY MUST BE ON DRUGS LOL to non-creatives.
Hey babe, what's your sign
January 27, 2026 at 8:30 PM
Hey babe, what's your sign
I want to see Zoë Steiner play Rick and Evelyn's daughter in the new Mummy sequel.
January 26, 2026 at 11:41 PM
I want to see Zoë Steiner play Rick and Evelyn's daughter in the new Mummy sequel.
My timeline right now:
January 26, 2026 at 10:35 PM
My timeline right now:
Of the results, Brandon Teaches Typing was the hysterical one. Check this shit out: brandonhare.itch.io/typing I scored 0.05 WMP!
January 26, 2026 at 10:00 AM
Of the results, Brandon Teaches Typing was the hysterical one. Check this shit out: brandonhare.itch.io/typing I scored 0.05 WMP!
Have you ever searched your name on itch.io? Well, *someone* searched "Brandon Seifert" on itch in the last 30 days, and it shows up in my referrals.
I followed in their footsteps, tonight. And the results for the name "Brandon" were ominous, and also hysterical!
I followed in their footsteps, tonight. And the results for the name "Brandon" were ominous, and also hysterical!
January 26, 2026 at 10:00 AM
Have you ever searched your name on itch.io? Well, *someone* searched "Brandon Seifert" on itch in the last 30 days, and it shows up in my referrals.
I followed in their footsteps, tonight. And the results for the name "Brandon" were ominous, and also hysterical!
I followed in their footsteps, tonight. And the results for the name "Brandon" were ominous, and also hysterical!
I listened to The Murderbot Diaries a lot last year. Per usual. @marthawells.com
January 25, 2026 at 11:12 AM
I listened to The Murderbot Diaries a lot last year. Per usual. @marthawells.com
@darylwriterguy.bsky.social I found it. The secret bridge between your books.
January 20, 2026 at 8:11 AM
@darylwriterguy.bsky.social I found it. The secret bridge between your books.
This is officially my new ring/alarmtone. Took me a while.
January 16, 2026 at 8:10 AM
This is officially my new ring/alarmtone. Took me a while.
@support.bsky.team I live in Oregon, and I am currently present there. Why am I getting age verification screens when I try to log into Chat? There are no age verification requirement laws in Oregon (or Washington, for that matter).
Please fix this.
Please fix this.
January 15, 2026 at 5:23 AM
@support.bsky.team I live in Oregon, and I am currently present there. Why am I getting age verification screens when I try to log into Chat? There are no age verification requirement laws in Oregon (or Washington, for that matter).
Please fix this.
Please fix this.
The parking lot across the street was on point this morning.
January 4, 2026 at 5:14 AM
The parking lot across the street was on point this morning.
This is Steven Miller's wife promising, uh, regime change? in Greenland.
As a reminder, there are an estimated 56,800 people in all of Greenland. If Greenland's population was a city in Washington State, it'd be the 23rd largest city there. They want the location and the resources.
As a reminder, there are an estimated 56,800 people in all of Greenland. If Greenland's population was a city in Washington State, it'd be the 23rd largest city there. They want the location and the resources.
January 4, 2026 at 12:17 AM
This is Steven Miller's wife promising, uh, regime change? in Greenland.
As a reminder, there are an estimated 56,800 people in all of Greenland. If Greenland's population was a city in Washington State, it'd be the 23rd largest city there. They want the location and the resources.
As a reminder, there are an estimated 56,800 people in all of Greenland. If Greenland's population was a city in Washington State, it'd be the 23rd largest city there. They want the location and the resources.
Get Your War On: 2026 Edition
January 3, 2026 at 11:51 PM
Get Your War On: 2026 Edition
Unrelated:
January 3, 2026 at 9:49 AM
Unrelated:
I periodically rediscover candymarkupartist/Joyce Spakman, and every time, I somehow forget to bookmark her amazing work. candymakeupartist.com
January 3, 2026 at 7:10 AM
I periodically rediscover candymarkupartist/Joyce Spakman, and every time, I somehow forget to bookmark her amazing work. candymakeupartist.com
Portland! Are you free at 6 PM? Come scream good riddance to 2025!
(The screaming will occur at "the Eastbank Esplanade between the North OMSI lot and the Hawthorne Bridge (at Clay)").
(The screaming will occur at "the Eastbank Esplanade between the North OMSI lot and the Hawthorne Bridge (at Clay)").
December 31, 2025 at 11:22 PM
Portland! Are you free at 6 PM? Come scream good riddance to 2025!
(The screaming will occur at "the Eastbank Esplanade between the North OMSI lot and the Hawthorne Bridge (at Clay)").
(The screaming will occur at "the Eastbank Esplanade between the North OMSI lot and the Hawthorne Bridge (at Clay)").
"But I don't want to cure cancer. I want to build a military-grade home security system for tech elites."
December 29, 2025 at 3:24 AM
"But I don't want to cure cancer. I want to build a military-grade home security system for tech elites."