Braddleton B. Bracenson
@bradbrace.bsky.social
My mother's maiden name is Danger.
Pinned
2025 is the year I start my onlyfans: halfhearted JOI from a guy eating Takis out of a large Ziploc bag into which I previously emptied like four bags of Takis.
See, as a Mexican I have no issue with Trump renaming the Gulf of Mexico after himself. El Golfo de America will be a very fitting way to honor him.
January 24, 2025 at 12:09 AM
See, as a Mexican I have no issue with Trump renaming the Gulf of Mexico after himself. El Golfo de America will be a very fitting way to honor him.
For 200 dollars I show up to your funeral. I'm head shaven and wearing a stylish suit. As they lower your casket into the ground I pull out a flip phone. Into it I say: "Proceed. Nobody can stop us now". I walk away breaking the flip phone in half.
January 23, 2025 at 9:15 PM
For 200 dollars I show up to your funeral. I'm head shaven and wearing a stylish suit. As they lower your casket into the ground I pull out a flip phone. Into it I say: "Proceed. Nobody can stop us now". I walk away breaking the flip phone in half.
Shame is a powerful tool of modern fascism. Not the shame of doing something wrong, instead it's the shame of not getting it, of not being in on the joke, of being lame. They don't forbid you noticing what happens before your eyes, they shame you into ignoring it.
January 21, 2025 at 3:18 AM
Shame is a powerful tool of modern fascism. Not the shame of doing something wrong, instead it's the shame of not getting it, of not being in on the joke, of being lame. They don't forbid you noticing what happens before your eyes, they shame you into ignoring it.
A thing people need to understand going forward. They will tell you they're joking while they arrest the undesirables. They will say they're just trolling as they put you up against the wall. They'll laugh and tell you to lighten up as they take aim. Musk was sending a signal with that salute.
January 21, 2025 at 1:40 AM
A thing people need to understand going forward. They will tell you they're joking while they arrest the undesirables. They will say they're just trolling as they put you up against the wall. They'll laugh and tell you to lighten up as they take aim. Musk was sending a signal with that salute.
I'm so, so very tired of being on alert all day, every day, no rest, no relief. Any moment my mom can go psychotic because of the dementia, and I have to be on the look out for that. Can't let it get too bad, can't really calm her down. Day after day of this, I can't do anything else.
January 18, 2025 at 9:49 PM
I'm so, so very tired of being on alert all day, every day, no rest, no relief. Any moment my mom can go psychotic because of the dementia, and I have to be on the look out for that. Can't let it get too bad, can't really calm her down. Day after day of this, I can't do anything else.
It's Jurassic Park, but in Jurassic times. Dinosaur scientists play God by creating a time portal through wich they capture humans for their park. They assumed humans would be too complacent to rebel, they were right. It's a boring movie, nothing goes wrong.
January 10, 2025 at 1:22 AM
It's Jurassic Park, but in Jurassic times. Dinosaur scientists play God by creating a time portal through wich they capture humans for their park. They assumed humans would be too complacent to rebel, they were right. It's a boring movie, nothing goes wrong.
Fuck I love cashews so much. I buy a bunch each time and then I overdo it, finish them in three days and my tummy ends up really unhappy about it. But they're so good. I could live on cashews alone. Now, cashews mixed with tamarind candies, now that's heave.
January 9, 2025 at 9:41 PM
Fuck I love cashews so much. I buy a bunch each time and then I overdo it, finish them in three days and my tummy ends up really unhappy about it. But they're so good. I could live on cashews alone. Now, cashews mixed with tamarind candies, now that's heave.
It sucks when you take a green candy, and it turns out to be that unholy green apple abomination.
January 9, 2025 at 12:41 AM
It sucks when you take a green candy, and it turns out to be that unholy green apple abomination.
And the first video game I ever played, was a clone of Pac-Man, where Pac-Man was a dog head and the ghosts where cat heads. It was an arcade cabinet at a corner shop. I used to make my grandma take me there. There was an old lady at the store who would chastise me for making my grandma wait.
January 7, 2025 at 7:53 AM
And the first video game I ever played, was a clone of Pac-Man, where Pac-Man was a dog head and the ghosts where cat heads. It was an arcade cabinet at a corner shop. I used to make my grandma take me there. There was an old lady at the store who would chastise me for making my grandma wait.
When I was a kid I had this "racing video game". It was a wind-up toy with a little plastic window. Behind the window a rolling strip of paper depicted little cars and little explosions and the road. A tiny wheel allowed you to control a little car painted on a little plastic tab.
January 7, 2025 at 7:50 AM
When I was a kid I had this "racing video game". It was a wind-up toy with a little plastic window. Behind the window a rolling strip of paper depicted little cars and little explosions and the road. A tiny wheel allowed you to control a little car painted on a little plastic tab.
Why did Blockbusters always smelled like socks? That's probably the one thing I remember most vividly about them. And the fact that they killed the much better local video rental chain.
January 5, 2025 at 12:36 AM
Why did Blockbusters always smelled like socks? That's probably the one thing I remember most vividly about them. And the fact that they killed the much better local video rental chain.
2025 is the year I start my onlyfans: halfhearted JOI from a guy eating Takis out of a large Ziploc bag into which I previously emptied like four bags of Takis.
January 1, 2025 at 9:22 AM
2025 is the year I start my onlyfans: halfhearted JOI from a guy eating Takis out of a large Ziploc bag into which I previously emptied like four bags of Takis.
According to the Oracle of Java, in 2025 uppon the localStorage it shall be that removeItem
January 1, 2025 at 9:12 AM
According to the Oracle of Java, in 2025 uppon the localStorage it shall be that removeItem
The I Ching says nothing about 2025. In fact the I Ching vanishes from the world during 2025 and won't reappear until 2026.
January 1, 2025 at 9:06 AM
The I Ching says nothing about 2025. In fact the I Ching vanishes from the world during 2025 and won't reappear until 2026.
According to Nostradamus, 2025 is the year we make contact with alien life forms, but in a chill way, like no big deal, like it's all good, welcome or whatever, you know?
January 1, 2025 at 9:04 AM
According to Nostradamus, 2025 is the year we make contact with alien life forms, but in a chill way, like no big deal, like it's all good, welcome or whatever, you know?
In Tarot, 2025 is the year of the backwards facing two headed cat. The hanged man but in a context of autoerotic asphyxiation. And the overwhelming throne.
January 1, 2025 at 9:02 AM
In Tarot, 2025 is the year of the backwards facing two headed cat. The hanged man but in a context of autoerotic asphyxiation. And the overwhelming throne.
According to the kabbalah, 2025 belongs to Zonama Sekot.
January 1, 2025 at 8:59 AM
According to the kabbalah, 2025 belongs to Zonama Sekot.
Numerologically, 2025 is the year of tripping over your own crocs. Small cups. Waking up fully alert half an hour before the alarm, going back for a little more sleep, then waking up with the alarm and feeling like absolute shit.
January 1, 2025 at 8:57 AM
Numerologically, 2025 is the year of tripping over your own crocs. Small cups. Waking up fully alert half an hour before the alarm, going back for a little more sleep, then waking up with the alarm and feeling like absolute shit.
2025 is also a leap year. No more walking, running or cartwheeling. Some flying is allowed.
January 1, 2025 at 8:53 AM
2025 is also a leap year. No more walking, running or cartwheeling. Some flying is allowed.
Did you know that 2025 is a prime number? Because if you did, you've been bamboozled.
January 1, 2025 at 8:52 AM
Did you know that 2025 is a prime number? Because if you did, you've been bamboozled.
This 2025 my main resolution is a state of absolute dissolution. Total moral discompensation. Debauchery, unbauchery, behaving as if bauchery never even existed. No bauches given or taken.
January 1, 2025 at 8:49 AM
This 2025 my main resolution is a state of absolute dissolution. Total moral discompensation. Debauchery, unbauchery, behaving as if bauchery never even existed. No bauches given or taken.
Watching a show where the guy mentions ancient Rome's graffiti, particularly the predominance of phalluses, and describes it as "erotic imagery". And it just made me realize that I would've never called drawings of phalluses "erotic". But I guess technically that's what they are?
December 30, 2024 at 9:18 PM
Watching a show where the guy mentions ancient Rome's graffiti, particularly the predominance of phalluses, and describes it as "erotic imagery". And it just made me realize that I would've never called drawings of phalluses "erotic". But I guess technically that's what they are?
So according to ChatGPT, Thomas Becket was killed while he was going cowboy on some soldier guy. I mean, at least he died doing what he loved?
December 29, 2024 at 6:50 PM
So according to ChatGPT, Thomas Becket was killed while he was going cowboy on some soldier guy. I mean, at least he died doing what he loved?
And then one day the sexual fantasy about summoning a sexy succubus girl, starts including a part where she uses her supernatural powers to heal your ailments before the sexy times can start.
"Yes, yes you can feast on my soul, first we're gonna have to do something about this sciatica though".
"Yes, yes you can feast on my soul, first we're gonna have to do something about this sciatica though".
December 28, 2024 at 7:44 PM
And then one day the sexual fantasy about summoning a sexy succubus girl, starts including a part where she uses her supernatural powers to heal your ailments before the sexy times can start.
"Yes, yes you can feast on my soul, first we're gonna have to do something about this sciatica though".
"Yes, yes you can feast on my soul, first we're gonna have to do something about this sciatica though".
Joy to the World. Joy Perry is an astronaut, the very last, sent on a mission to contact the strange object orbiting the Moon. Perhaps there humanity can find an answer to the mystery of the one year time loop which has been repeating for fifteen iterations.
December 27, 2024 at 9:23 AM
Joy to the World. Joy Perry is an astronaut, the very last, sent on a mission to contact the strange object orbiting the Moon. Perhaps there humanity can find an answer to the mystery of the one year time loop which has been repeating for fifteen iterations.