As I fold laundry, I’ve come to realize that 80% of my wardrobe is made up of pajamas or items that are pajama adjacent. I really need to get out more and stop buying pj pants.

I just want to go to the beach and pretend that i live there like a fancy crab.

Happy Thanksgiving from my drunk bird and i.

Getting old has some “benefits” after all!!

Thanksgiving at my house will be epic.

NO TURKEY FOR FACISTS.

It hurts that so many people can sell their soul (and our kids futures) for the promise of cheaper eggs and vindication.

Oh, but I will…..

Your morning reminder:

Im a really shitty housewife. This is why im not trying to live some conservative Christian wet dream. I want to shave my head, pierce something and go back to work at a weed dispensary as soon as my kids aren’t helpless.