Blythe Chadim
@blythewrites.bsky.social
Geriatric millennial and permanently tired toddler mom, trying to find the humor in life’s craziness—and write about it.
Give your office copy machine a little diddle. It needs it. And check out my latest piece @pointsincase.com
#comedy #funny #office #work
www.pointsincase.com/articles/a-p...
#comedy #funny #office #work
www.pointsincase.com/articles/a-p...
A Plea for Intimacy from the Forgotten Office Copy Machine
Just because you don't need me to print those big Excel spreadsheets anymore doesn’t mean I don’t want my buttons fingered regularly.
www.pointsincase.com
October 9, 2025 at 12:39 PM
Give your office copy machine a little diddle. It needs it. And check out my latest piece @pointsincase.com
#comedy #funny #office #work
www.pointsincase.com/articles/a-p...
#comedy #funny #office #work
www.pointsincase.com/articles/a-p...
Reposted by Blythe Chadim
Does your toddler like dates? How about a playdate next Tuesday?
By @blythewrites.bsky.social
medium.com/frazzled/is-...
By @blythewrites.bsky.social
medium.com/frazzled/is-...
“Is That a Monster Truck in Your Pocket?” and Other Pickup Lines I’m Using to Make Mom Friends
Does your toddler like dates? How about a playdate next Tuesday?
medium.com
September 12, 2025 at 2:35 PM
Does your toddler like dates? How about a playdate next Tuesday?
By @blythewrites.bsky.social
medium.com/frazzled/is-...
By @blythewrites.bsky.social
medium.com/frazzled/is-...
Reposted by Blythe Chadim
“Aside from the 10 Commandments in Hand-Chiseled Tablet Form.” By @blythewrites.bsky.social
Full piece: thebelladonnacomedy.com/items-requir...
Full piece: thebelladonnacomedy.com/items-requir...
August 20, 2025 at 3:00 PM
“Aside from the 10 Commandments in Hand-Chiseled Tablet Form.” By @blythewrites.bsky.social
Full piece: thebelladonnacomedy.com/items-requir...
Full piece: thebelladonnacomedy.com/items-requir...
Happy first full week of school to all who celebrate!
Check out my latest piece in the @belladonnacomedy.bsky.social!
#school #texaspolitics #satire #humor
thebelladonnacomedy.com/items-requir...
Check out my latest piece in the @belladonnacomedy.bsky.social!
#school #texaspolitics #satire #humor
thebelladonnacomedy.com/items-requir...
Items Required to Be Displayed in All Texas Classrooms This Fall
Aside from the 10 Commandments in Hand-Chiseled Tablet Form
thebelladonnacomedy.com
August 20, 2025 at 12:39 PM
Happy first full week of school to all who celebrate!
Check out my latest piece in the @belladonnacomedy.bsky.social!
#school #texaspolitics #satire #humor
thebelladonnacomedy.com/items-requir...
Check out my latest piece in the @belladonnacomedy.bsky.social!
#school #texaspolitics #satire #humor
thebelladonnacomedy.com/items-requir...
Love this new piece by Luís Leal Miranda in @pointsincase.com. I have also encountered plenty of three dimensional beings who lack depth. Maybe this will help with those awkward conversations.
www.pointsincase.com/articles/how...
www.pointsincase.com/articles/how...
How to Explain a Hole to a Two-Dimensional Being
A clumsy answer could lead to confusion. Too much detail, and you risk sending your flat friend into an existential spiral.
www.pointsincase.com
July 30, 2025 at 2:33 PM
Love this new piece by Luís Leal Miranda in @pointsincase.com. I have also encountered plenty of three dimensional beings who lack depth. Maybe this will help with those awkward conversations.
www.pointsincase.com/articles/how...
www.pointsincase.com/articles/how...
Thanks @robotbutt.bsky.social for publishing this piece. #canada #apologies #satire
www.robotbutt.com/2025/06/26/o...
www.robotbutt.com/2025/06/26/o...
O Canada, Please Accept These Apologies so We Can Be Besties Again | Robot Butt
Canada, we would like to formally apologize.
www.robotbutt.com
June 27, 2025 at 12:37 AM
Thanks @robotbutt.bsky.social for publishing this piece. #canada #apologies #satire
www.robotbutt.com/2025/06/26/o...
www.robotbutt.com/2025/06/26/o...
I don't know about anyone else, but I've always wondered what my life would be like in a car commercial.
Love this @rj-x.bsky.social.
#satire #comedy
Love this @rj-x.bsky.social.
#satire #comedy
This muddy car plus your wolf family will make for a pretty incredible #weekend-pics Slack post come Monday.
Five Places You Will Definitely Drive This SUV, According to the Commercials
This muddy car plus your wolf family will make for a pretty incredible #weekend-pics Slack post come Monday.
www.pointsincase.com
May 29, 2025 at 12:21 PM
I don't know about anyone else, but I've always wondered what my life would be like in a car commercial.
Love this @rj-x.bsky.social.
#satire #comedy
Love this @rj-x.bsky.social.
#satire #comedy
Check out my latest satire in @belladonnacomedy.bsky.social. Friend link below.
#satire #comedy #humor
thebelladonnacomedy.com/hey-america-...
#satire #comedy #humor
thebelladonnacomedy.com/hey-america-...
Hey America, It’s Your Boy, Satan.
Seriously, though, none of this is on me.
thebelladonnacomedy.com
May 28, 2025 at 12:16 PM
Check out my latest satire in @belladonnacomedy.bsky.social. Friend link below.
#satire #comedy #humor
thebelladonnacomedy.com/hey-america-...
#satire #comedy #humor
thebelladonnacomedy.com/hey-america-...
Check out my new satire featured on @belladonnacomedy.bsky.social.
“Seriously, though, none of this is on me.” By @blythewrites.bsky.social
Full piece: thebelladonnacomedy.com/hey-america-...
Full piece: thebelladonnacomedy.com/hey-america-...
May 26, 2025 at 3:30 PM
Check out my new satire featured on @belladonnacomedy.bsky.social.
Reposted by Blythe Chadim
"Since 1988, we’ve been waiting for the future to arrive at Little League concession stands and any place that smells like popcorn and feet. But now that the future is here, we regret to announce that we are extremely disappointed."
This Isn’t the Future We at Dippin’ Dots Envisioned
Since 1988, we at Dippin’ Dots have proudly sold the official ice cream of the future. And ever since, we’ve been waiting for the future to arrive ...
buff.ly
May 22, 2025 at 3:25 PM
"Since 1988, we’ve been waiting for the future to arrive at Little League concession stands and any place that smells like popcorn and feet. But now that the future is here, we regret to announce that we are extremely disappointed."
My latest humor piece. Thank you @frazzledhumor.bsky.social!
#satire #parenting #humor
medium.com/frazzled/7-w...
#satire #parenting #humor
medium.com/frazzled/7-w...
7 Ways to Reanimate Your Life After Motherhood Hijacked Your Body and Mind Like That Fungus From…
You’re still you; it just doesn’t always feel like it
medium.com
April 30, 2025 at 1:27 PM
My latest humor piece. Thank you @frazzledhumor.bsky.social!
#satire #parenting #humor
medium.com/frazzled/7-w...
#satire #parenting #humor
medium.com/frazzled/7-w...
Just about every situation can be managed in Samuel L. Jackson movie quotes, including conversations with your stockbroker.
#satire #comedy #writing #moviequotes
medium.com/the-haven/sa...
#satire #comedy #writing #moviequotes
medium.com/the-haven/sa...
Samuel L. Jackson Movie Quotes or Conversations With My Stockbroker?
Who can tell anymore?
medium.com
April 22, 2025 at 4:19 PM
Just about every situation can be managed in Samuel L. Jackson movie quotes, including conversations with your stockbroker.
#satire #comedy #writing #moviequotes
medium.com/the-haven/sa...
#satire #comedy #writing #moviequotes
medium.com/the-haven/sa...
What Your Pole Decor Says About You This Flag-Waving Season
Traditional American Flag:
medium.com
April 18, 2025 at 4:37 PM
So excited for my Second City classmate Elaine. I love this piece! thebelladonnacomedy.com/my-to-do-lis...
My To Do List After Watching “With Love, Meghan”
Get a bee guy.
thebelladonnacomedy.com
April 18, 2025 at 3:11 PM
So excited for my Second City classmate Elaine. I love this piece! thebelladonnacomedy.com/my-to-do-lis...
Reposted by Blythe Chadim
"Yes, there’s danger in opening our gates to this statue. But there’s also danger in keeping it out… the danger of eroding the sanctity of the gift-giving process."
Senator Schumer Votes to Let the Big Wooden Horse into Troy
“In the wake of votes by a handful of key Democrats, led by Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer, to pass a GOP-led continuing resolution funding f...
www.mcsweeneys.net
March 22, 2025 at 12:30 PM
"Yes, there’s danger in opening our gates to this statue. But there’s also danger in keeping it out… the danger of eroding the sanctity of the gift-giving process."
Reposted by Blythe Chadim
"We're doing just whatever we feel like with no foresight, illustrating one of the Willy-Nilly System’s central tenets: There are no wrong answers because we should not assess any of our decisions before implementing them."
Introducing the Willy-Nilly System of Governance
The Willy-Nilly System of Governance is a hybrid model that brings together both definitions of the term willy-nilly: “in a careless way without pl...
www.mcsweeneys.net
March 12, 2025 at 1:20 AM
"We're doing just whatever we feel like with no foresight, illustrating one of the Willy-Nilly System’s central tenets: There are no wrong answers because we should not assess any of our decisions before implementing them."
My latest humor piece. Thank you @frazzledhumor.bsky.social for publishing! And shout out to my beautiful children for inspiring my writing 😜
6:41 AM: Threenager must get dressed immediately. The meltdown brewing threatens to ignite a blaze of Quarth-summoning fury if you can’t figure out how to travel back in time and dress Threenager before this exact moment.
By @blythewrites.bsky.social
medium.com/frazzled/a-d...
By @blythewrites.bsky.social
medium.com/frazzled/a-d...
A Day in the Life of Quarth, Bringer of Tantrums (AKA: Your Threenager)
It’s a good thing they’re cute
medium.com
March 7, 2025 at 1:15 PM
My latest humor piece. Thank you @frazzledhumor.bsky.social for publishing! And shout out to my beautiful children for inspiring my writing 😜
Reposted by Blythe Chadim
Who’s playing along with Pete tonight?!
March 5, 2025 at 12:30 AM
Who’s playing along with Pete tonight?!
Reposted by Blythe Chadim
"What kind of mother would I be if, after everything I’ve learned from the message board 'VAXXING IS LYING,' I decided to trust Dr. Wong over Steve, a blogger with more than 3,000 followers?"
I’m Vaccinating My Child the Natural Way—With Measles
Look, I’ve had it up to here with fear-mongering pediatricians pushing unnecessary vaccines in the name of something called “herd immunity.” When i...
buff.ly
March 1, 2025 at 2:01 PM
"What kind of mother would I be if, after everything I’ve learned from the message board 'VAXXING IS LYING,' I decided to trust Dr. Wong over Steve, a blogger with more than 3,000 followers?"
Congrats to team #Canada on their win over team USA. Canada is an amazing country full of passionate, caring people. There are a lot of us who would like to "join you" as you celebrate this victory. *Wink if you understand. (Please help.)
February 21, 2025 at 1:03 PM
Congrats to team #Canada on their win over team USA. Canada is an amazing country full of passionate, caring people. There are a lot of us who would like to "join you" as you celebrate this victory. *Wink if you understand. (Please help.)
Reposted by Blythe Chadim
"Today, our team agreed that [REDACTED], which led to our decision to end Medicare and Medicaid. Makes perfect sense now, right?"
We’re Being Maximally Transparent. For Instance, We [REDACTED]
“…all of our actions are maximally transparent. I don’t know of a case where an organization has been more transparent than the Doge organization.”...
buff.ly
February 12, 2025 at 7:30 PM
"Today, our team agreed that [REDACTED], which led to our decision to end Medicare and Medicaid. Makes perfect sense now, right?"
Sharing my latest humor piece, a (very) personal essay published by Age of Empathy. Thanks for reading 💛 #humor #essays
medium.com/age-of-empat...
medium.com/age-of-empat...
I Nearly Died (From Embarrassment) on My Honeymoon
But now, I’m laughing humiliation in the face, and I invite you to laugh with me.
medium.com
February 12, 2025 at 3:03 PM
Sharing my latest humor piece, a (very) personal essay published by Age of Empathy. Thanks for reading 💛 #humor #essays
medium.com/age-of-empat...
medium.com/age-of-empat...
Reposted by Blythe Chadim
“You’re singing along when the woman beside you asks you to stop because she’s live on SOCIAL MEDIA PLATFORM YOU’VE NEVER HEARD OF and you’re scaring her followers.”
Stop spying on me, McSweeney’s!
Stop spying on me, McSweeney’s!
"Your partner bought two tickets to see [BAND YOU ONLY HEAR NOW AT THE DMV & CVS]. "What do I wear?” you wonder. Certainly, your [CLOTHING ITEM YOU ROUTINELY SLEEP IN] should be fine."
Middle-Aged Concertgoer Mad Libs
Your partner bought two tickets to see BAND YOU ONLY HEAR NOW AT THE DMV & CVS. “What do I wear?” you wonder. Certainly, your CLOTHING ITEM YOU...
buff.ly
February 8, 2025 at 2:22 AM
“You’re singing along when the woman beside you asks you to stop because she’s live on SOCIAL MEDIA PLATFORM YOU’VE NEVER HEARD OF and you’re scaring her followers.”
Stop spying on me, McSweeney’s!
Stop spying on me, McSweeney’s!