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“The idea that one must be alive to serve as labor secretary is outdated and rooted in reverse racism. I mean, what does the Secretary of Labor even do?" Karoline Leavitt asked a reporter.

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July 25, 2025 at 4:01 PM
Hulk Hogan To Remain As Secretary Of Labor Following His Death:
Hulk Hogan To Remain As Secretary Of Labor Following His Death
The famed former wrestling star and current Secretary of Labor, Hulk Hogan, has passed away at the age of 71.
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July 25, 2025 at 3:59 PM
“We’re currently looking at a tiered model. You could have things like no engine fires in the top tier; A tier below that could be up to one engine fire, maybe some explosions; And then a tier below that will be our original ‘Anything Goes’ policy.”

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July 21, 2025 at 3:55 PM
Delta Airlines Begins Charging Additional Fee For Non-Flaming Flights:

www.bluffpost.com/p/delta-to-b...
Delta To Begin Charging Additional Fee For Non-Flaming Flights
Delta Airlines has announced its plans to enact a bold new earnings strategy.
www.bluffpost.com
July 21, 2025 at 3:55 PM
The officer expressed the toll that the job has taken on his mental health:

“I’ve got a family at home, and now I have to break the news to them that we need to find a new Mexican take-out spot. I’ll have to live with that for the rest of my life.”

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July 20, 2025 at 7:50 PM
ICE Officer Politely Waits For Food Truck To Finish His Order Before Deporting Cook:

www.bluffpost.com/p/ice-office...
ICE Officer Politely Waits For Food Truck To Finish His Order Before Deporting Cook
“It’s definitely going to be hard to find a new favorite lunch spot,” stated John Donahue, an ICE officer in Los Angeles, CA.
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July 20, 2025 at 7:48 PM
Trump, desperate to evade the spotlight of the recent backlash, is trying anything and everything to distract the media. Just today, he displayed his newly acquired nose and belly button piercings in public and shouted the n-word at a blade of grass.

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July 17, 2025 at 8:31 PM
“There is no Epstein list, and even if there was, there’s probably a lot of phony stuff in there. And who’s to say what’s true? It’s all she said, I said.” Trump told a group of reporters in the Oval Office on Wednesday.

www.bluffpost.com/p/trump-seri...
Trump Seriously Beginning To Regret Molesting All Those Children
“If I’d known you guys were gonna make such a big deal out of this, I’d have hardly even molested those kids,” stated President Donald Trump, responding to supporter backlash over the administration’s...
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July 17, 2025 at 8:30 PM
BREAKING NEWS: Former Vice President Dick Cheney Tragically Found Alive At Age 84

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Former Vice President Dick Cheney Tragically Found Alive At Age 84
Dick Cheney, 46th Vice President of the United States, was tragically found alive and well at his home in Wilson, Wyoming.
www.bluffpost.com
July 15, 2025 at 4:48 PM
No one was more shocked to hear the news than Cheney himself:

“I thought I’d died and reached hell ever since we had that black president. You mean to tell me that was real?”

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July 15, 2025 at 4:47 PM
“My only fear is that the ‘boys’ are too stupid to partake in self-reflection of any form. I’d be surprised if they ever felt guilt, remorse, contrition, or really anything beyond being drunk,” stated former President Barack Obama.

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July 11, 2025 at 7:32 PM
“Please lower your water consumption, your electricity usage, your breathing. We must redirect these resources to AI in order to save the human race.”

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July 9, 2025 at 6:22 PM
"In order to get to that point, however, OpenAI estimates it will need $180 billion from investors and the construction of 15 more AI super data centers, which are estimated to increase AI water consumption by 70,000%."

www.bluffpost.com/p/sam-altman...
Sam Altman: 'AI Less Than 10 Years From Solving AI Driven Water Shortage'
Sam Altman, CEO of OpenAI, the company behind ChatGPT, believes artificial intelligence is only “a few thousand days” away from solving a pertinent crisis for humanity.
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July 9, 2025 at 6:21 PM
DOJ Finds No Evidence That Jeffrey Epstein Wasn't Actually A Chill Guy Once You Got To Know Him
DOJ Finds Jeffrey Epstein Was Actually A Chill Guy Once You Got To Know Him
A review overseen by Attorney General Pam Bondi has concluded that the deceased financier Jeffrey Epstein was “actually a chill guy once you got to know him.”
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July 8, 2025 at 4:08 PM
"The department has released hours of declassified footage as part of its review. In the footage, Epstein can be seen reclining in a lounge chair, sipping on what appears to be a strawberry daiquiri."

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July 8, 2025 at 4:07 PM
“If Trump put this Matthew Tillerman guy in charge of FEMA, then I’m sure he’s more than capable! I trust him!” shouted an unnamed drowning civilian as he floated by.

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July 6, 2025 at 10:28 PM
Trump responds to questions about FEMA cuts :

www.bluffpost.com/p/fema-now-j...
July 6, 2025 at 10:27 PM
"With the death count rising, Texas’s hopes now lie in the capable hands of Matthew Tillerman and his rope and life jacket."

www.bluffpost.com/p/fema-now-j...
FEMA Now Just One Guy With Life Jacket, Rope
“We’re as committed as ever to helping people before, during, and after disasters," said Matthew Tillerman, the last employee of the Federal Emergency Management Agency.
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July 6, 2025 at 10:25 PM
“Sometimes you have to settle for a bill that’s not perfect, but has some of what you’re looking for. You can’t keep holding out for the perfect bill to come along and swoop you off your feet. Stuff like that only happens in fairytales,” said Senator John Thune.

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July 3, 2025 at 9:23 PM
As Trump Prepares To Sign The 'Big, Beautiful Bill,' Reports Say He's Keeping His Options Open:

www.bluffpost.com/p/trump-alre...
Trump Already Eyeing Up 'Younger, More Attractive' Bill
This Thursday, Congress has passed President Donald Trump’s “big, beautiful’ bill.
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July 3, 2025 at 9:22 PM
“He could’ve jumped in front of the plane or called up his Muslim friends and told them they’re flying too low. But, no. He didn’t even run into the burning buildings to save anyone. Those people, their blood is on his hands.”

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June 30, 2025 at 8:18 PM
Eye Witness: 'Mamdani Did Nothing, Just Watched As The Towers Fell'
Eye Witness: 'Mamdani Did Nothing, Just Watched As The Towers Fell'
Scathing revelations cast aspersions on the newly elected Democratic nominee for the New York mayoral race.
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June 30, 2025 at 8:17 PM