Grandfather said the same thing. Then he beat me with a switch. Big switches, tiny switches. Bricks. All of the above. I feel bad this was robbed from the zoomies. Good ol switch licks. Classic lickening

last cross section i went too was pretty crazy. way too bloody for me but to each his own. i time traveled by the way. that’s how i was there. i do that a lot with astral projecting. i was really there though

~me smashing a fascist~
sorry this doesn’t normally happen - gimme a second… can you push them together

actually that monster is in a lot of pain. as a professional monster keeper this monster is quite uncomfortable

“cum” “ass” lords work

saw this episode when it came out. it was okay for the most part but when elon went full whine-cel on lisa i had a shit ton of anxiety and had to go to my panic room (toilet, just had to shit but felt really bad)

how do you feel about shallot cakes

i came to this 3 times non consecutively. came for the pyromania, stayed cumming for the burnt hair smell

excellent argument sir. the jury of your peers has arrested their case

she diet on my coca until i cola

talk to dr doucher who refused to photocopy the x-ray of my colon i needed for my small claims lawsuit concerning the fracas

an asset protection officer stationed at a wal-mart⭐️ in lexington KY bruised my penile frenulum after tackling me to the ground. i wasn’t stealing anything but i was bare assed in the toy aisle trying to see if GI joe would fit up my hole

hate this genre of post. my Pa was a coal miner in the 30’s, he died of emphysema from eating so much ass down there. just shoveling ass. this was pre-dump truck but he had dump trucks of dumb fucks ready to get soul sucked down in the dark belly of some hick town. don’t disrespect his sacrifice

hey billy boy. last time i “played with my pud” in front of Capra hircus (her-crust if you know what i mean) it was a brisk october morning circa 2002 in the appalachias. succumbed to lust, dropped trow, blew a fatty into the dirt

what does it mean? (i know it what it means) or do i (i do)

seeing some shit advice here. first things first, mega fuck safety glasses. i’ve grinded every day of my miserable life. i do wear a monacle because it’s monacool. it was also $245 which was a rather large investment, can’t turn back now. goes good with my newsman’s cap. newsdude cap if you would

i inherited a LOAD of money in ‘93 when my great nana died. she wasn’t great but she was my great nana. anyway got like $3k bought a couple cartons of Kool menthol cigarettes (that’s kewl for all you youngsters (thanks Biden)) and let the rest rip investing in silver. turns out it was fool’s silver

tell me about it. all of my gooning buddies have switched to threads. not that gooning though. not the one you’re thinking of. the other gooning. invented in 1985 by one S. Spielberg. not the one where you jerk it.

just googled a pic of tommy pickles and i am fucking disgusted. sick to my stomach. outraged. i just shit myself. i just fucking shit my britches