not a real duck
@bjkwhite.bsky.social
Disabled autistic Aotearoan Pākehā, physically and mentally weak. Writes a bit. Enjoys things sometimes. Uncomfortably familiar with depression, distressingly close acquaintances with anxiety. CFS/ME/etcetcetc.
Despite everything, optimistic.
Despite everything, optimistic.
Pinned
I made a Spindlewheel game a few years ago and just recently thought to release it. Elsewise Ecologies is about creating & connecting lifeforms to create an ecology. It's good, you might like it.
bjkwhite.itch.io/elsewise-eco...
bjkwhite.itch.io/elsewise-eco...
Elsewise Ecologies by BJK
a Spindlewheel game about the lives of the unfamiliar
bjkwhite.itch.io
September 30, 2025 at 5:30 AM
I made a Spindlewheel game a few years ago and just recently thought to release it. Elsewise Ecologies is about creating & connecting lifeforms to create an ecology. It's good, you might like it.
bjkwhite.itch.io/elsewise-eco...
bjkwhite.itch.io/elsewise-eco...
Upon this day of fools, April 1st, 2025, I present the traditional offering of a young Steven Vincent Buscemi.
March 31, 2025 at 10:05 PM
Upon this day of fools, April 1st, 2025, I present the traditional offering of a young Steven Vincent Buscemi.
I woke up and learned David Lynch has died and I think that's me done for the day.
January 16, 2025 at 11:05 PM
I woke up and learned David Lynch has died and I think that's me done for the day.
I bought myself a Kermit the Frog puppet for Xmas and I have discovered one way to kick my brain into 'emotional processing' mode is to have Kermit sing Bein' Green to me.
December 25, 2024 at 5:44 AM
I bought myself a Kermit the Frog puppet for Xmas and I have discovered one way to kick my brain into 'emotional processing' mode is to have Kermit sing Bein' Green to me.
Nose birds spotted at local shop. Will update with more information if it becomes available. (Sheep unrelated.)
December 18, 2024 at 6:48 PM
Nose birds spotted at local shop. Will update with more information if it becomes available. (Sheep unrelated.)
Sweet peas performed magnificently this year.
December 18, 2024 at 4:35 AM
Sweet peas performed magnificently this year.
So far Zenless Zone Zero is fun + satisfying, has a parry system with clear indicators, ridiculously good animation, fun characters, and has made me feel some emotions, so I give it a preliminary assessment of 💖good👍
July 6, 2024 at 12:36 AM
So far Zenless Zone Zero is fun + satisfying, has a parry system with clear indicators, ridiculously good animation, fun characters, and has made me feel some emotions, so I give it a preliminary assessment of 💖good👍
I have discovered my new favourite activity, which is to watch Taskmaster repeats while my daughter reads Wikipedia entries. Tonight we started from breast cancer--not promising, we both thought, but it led to Anne of Austria and oh what a ride it was.
July 5, 2024 at 10:47 AM
I have discovered my new favourite activity, which is to watch Taskmaster repeats while my daughter reads Wikipedia entries. Tonight we started from breast cancer--not promising, we both thought, but it led to Anne of Austria and oh what a ride it was.
Reading about how autistic people w/ ADHD have a hard time in burnout, because they need both calm rest AND fun stimulation, and I was like "sort of describes writing really" and I flashed back to stressful times when I was writing 10k+ words a day for days on end like, oh. That was self-medication.
June 25, 2024 at 10:01 AM
Reading about how autistic people w/ ADHD have a hard time in burnout, because they need both calm rest AND fun stimulation, and I was like "sort of describes writing really" and I flashed back to stressful times when I was writing 10k+ words a day for days on end like, oh. That was self-medication.
Live versions of songs I love and have listened to dozens of times are amazing. The variations, all the little changes, hearing the crowd cheering like my brain is cheering. It's all so good.
thebethsnz.bandcamp.com/album/auckla...
thebethsnz.bandcamp.com/album/auckla...
Auckland, New Zealand, 2020, by The Beths
16 track album
thebethsnz.bandcamp.com
June 25, 2024 at 3:06 AM
Live versions of songs I love and have listened to dozens of times are amazing. The variations, all the little changes, hearing the crowd cheering like my brain is cheering. It's all so good.
thebethsnz.bandcamp.com/album/auckla...
thebethsnz.bandcamp.com/album/auckla...
I've discovered an effective hack for autistic/ADHD/ND task paralysis. You imagine Mike from Breaking Bad telling you what to do.
"So what you're gonna do is pick up that dish. Good. Now put it in its place. You know what its place is? That's right, on the shelf. Nice and steady. No half measures."
"So what you're gonna do is pick up that dish. Good. Now put it in its place. You know what its place is? That's right, on the shelf. Nice and steady. No half measures."
June 19, 2024 at 1:52 AM
I've discovered an effective hack for autistic/ADHD/ND task paralysis. You imagine Mike from Breaking Bad telling you what to do.
"So what you're gonna do is pick up that dish. Good. Now put it in its place. You know what its place is? That's right, on the shelf. Nice and steady. No half measures."
"So what you're gonna do is pick up that dish. Good. Now put it in its place. You know what its place is? That's right, on the shelf. Nice and steady. No half measures."
Them: "So are you autistic or nah?"
Me: "I don't have the resources to get an official diagnosis but I've been told there's enough significance in self-reported tests that an expert diagnosis would be more likely than not."
Then: "...that is the most autistic sentence I've ever heard."
Me: "I don't have the resources to get an official diagnosis but I've been told there's enough significance in self-reported tests that an expert diagnosis would be more likely than not."
Then: "...that is the most autistic sentence I've ever heard."
June 8, 2024 at 11:10 PM
Them: "So are you autistic or nah?"
Me: "I don't have the resources to get an official diagnosis but I've been told there's enough significance in self-reported tests that an expert diagnosis would be more likely than not."
Then: "...that is the most autistic sentence I've ever heard."
Me: "I don't have the resources to get an official diagnosis but I've been told there's enough significance in self-reported tests that an expert diagnosis would be more likely than not."
Then: "...that is the most autistic sentence I've ever heard."
Roleplaying is amazing because it's like, you really find your limits. Sure, I can play a different gender, a different sexuality. I can play an elf, a robot, a vampire, no problem, fun fun fun--sorry, what's that? Someone who *doesn't like tea?*
No, impossible. Hard limit. Line I cannot cross.
No, impossible. Hard limit. Line I cannot cross.
May 26, 2024 at 11:20 AM
Roleplaying is amazing because it's like, you really find your limits. Sure, I can play a different gender, a different sexuality. I can play an elf, a robot, a vampire, no problem, fun fun fun--sorry, what's that? Someone who *doesn't like tea?*
No, impossible. Hard limit. Line I cannot cross.
No, impossible. Hard limit. Line I cannot cross.
I love The Beths and, right now, I love 2am in particular.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=rWlE...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=rWlE...
The Beths - "2am" (Official Visualizer)
ORDER "EXPERT IN A DYING FIELD" NOW https://thebeths.lnk.to/ExpertInADyingField CREDITS The Beths are: Elizabeth Stokes Jonathan Pearce Benjamin Sinclair Tristan Deck Original artwork by Lily Paris West p + c 2022 Carpark Records
www.youtube.com
May 8, 2024 at 9:12 PM
I love The Beths and, right now, I love 2am in particular.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=rWlE...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=rWlE...
Upon this day of fools, April 1st, 2024, I present the traditional offering of a young Steven Vincent Buscemi.
April 1, 2024 at 8:06 PM
Upon this day of fools, April 1st, 2024, I present the traditional offering of a young Steven Vincent Buscemi.
I just learnt that te reo Māori has a word for autism, created by Keri Opai, which is takiwātanga, or 'their own time and space', and so I'm just going to be sitting here having a little cry about how beautiful that is.
Takiwatanga - in your own time and space - short version
WHAT IS THE Māori word for ‘autism’?‘ Takiwātanga’. It is a derivation of: “tōku/tōna anō takiwā” – “my/his/her own time and space”. http://bit.ly/2x6dpOb
www.youtube.com
March 17, 2024 at 8:57 PM
I just learnt that te reo Māori has a word for autism, created by Keri Opai, which is takiwātanga, or 'their own time and space', and so I'm just going to be sitting here having a little cry about how beautiful that is.
Extremely Specific Feeling: Get emotional about the way Kohane rolls the r in the final line of Hitsuji ga Ippiki, go online trying to find discourse about this, fail, but then have a daughter be like, Dad! There's a new song in Project Sekai! And be able to get excited about it with her.
February 26, 2024 at 2:48 AM
Extremely Specific Feeling: Get emotional about the way Kohane rolls the r in the final line of Hitsuji ga Ippiki, go online trying to find discourse about this, fail, but then have a daughter be like, Dad! There's a new song in Project Sekai! And be able to get excited about it with her.
When I was a wee lad I loved Transformers. I watched the cartoon and I had an Optimus Prime and a Bumblebee and I was really jealous of my friend who had a Soundwave with the little cassettes /that were also transformers/. So naturally I was excited when I learnt there was going to be a movie.
November 28, 2023 at 12:56 AM
When I was a wee lad I loved Transformers. I watched the cartoon and I had an Optimus Prime and a Bumblebee and I was really jealous of my friend who had a Soundwave with the little cassettes /that were also transformers/. So naturally I was excited when I learnt there was going to be a movie.
"So this character is cool and competent with a complicated past."
ok
"This one's stylish and deep with hidden facets to their personality."
yep
"And this one's an absolute unforgiveable dork with the depth of a puddle."
Yes where when yes please
ok
"This one's stylish and deep with hidden facets to their personality."
yep
"And this one's an absolute unforgiveable dork with the depth of a puddle."
Yes where when yes please
November 7, 2023 at 5:37 AM
"So this character is cool and competent with a complicated past."
ok
"This one's stylish and deep with hidden facets to their personality."
yep
"And this one's an absolute unforgiveable dork with the depth of a puddle."
Yes where when yes please
ok
"This one's stylish and deep with hidden facets to their personality."
yep
"And this one's an absolute unforgiveable dork with the depth of a puddle."
Yes where when yes please
The other day, while I was walking, quietly reminiscent of a regular human, a tūī alighted upon a kōwhai right next to me. And I really liked that.
nzbirdsonline.org.nz/species/tui
www.doc.govt.nz/nature/nativ...
nzbirdsonline.org.nz/species/tui
www.doc.govt.nz/nature/nativ...
Tūī | Tui | New Zealand Birds Online
nzbirdsonline.org.nz
October 25, 2023 at 9:07 PM
The other day, while I was walking, quietly reminiscent of a regular human, a tūī alighted upon a kōwhai right next to me. And I really liked that.
nzbirdsonline.org.nz/species/tui
www.doc.govt.nz/nature/nativ...
nzbirdsonline.org.nz/species/tui
www.doc.govt.nz/nature/nativ...
My review of Super Mario Wonder is that it makes me laugh in delight, and at this time in this world that is a treasure beyond compare.
October 20, 2023 at 9:03 AM
My review of Super Mario Wonder is that it makes me laugh in delight, and at this time in this world that is a treasure beyond compare.
Unreasonably gleeful to learn that a moment is an actual measurement of time, related to the movement of shadow on a sundial. Forty moments to a solar hour! That means a moment is around 90 seconds, give or take.
I love things like this. I know my wonky brain will forget it but right now I'm happy.
I love things like this. I know my wonky brain will forget it but right now I'm happy.
October 17, 2023 at 10:46 PM
Unreasonably gleeful to learn that a moment is an actual measurement of time, related to the movement of shadow on a sundial. Forty moments to a solar hour! That means a moment is around 90 seconds, give or take.
I love things like this. I know my wonky brain will forget it but right now I'm happy.
I love things like this. I know my wonky brain will forget it but right now I'm happy.
Went from 'Ah! It's almost November!' to having three potential projects for NaNoWriMo lined up. Leaning towards the one I've provisionally titled There Are No Wolves At Camp Wolf because it's a one-and-done thing and I've got a good angle for the narrative voice.
October 13, 2023 at 1:27 AM
Went from 'Ah! It's almost November!' to having three potential projects for NaNoWriMo lined up. Leaning towards the one I've provisionally titled There Are No Wolves At Camp Wolf because it's a one-and-done thing and I've got a good angle for the narrative voice.
Nothing is true. Everything is permitted.
October 11, 2023 at 9:46 PM
Nothing is true. Everything is permitted.