Black pants, they don't show stains.

Weeping over Rufus and Ziggy, sorry work for being a wreck!

This is the crossover post I have been waiting for!

Okay, but what about petty revenge? I don't think I can give up my vengeful ways cold turkey.

There is a certain delight to sending a bag of gummy bear dicks to your rude neighbor anonymously, I'm just sayin'.

Shit, that's Roberts? I thought it was John Boehner for a moment, and I was going to photoshop in a glass of red wine in one hand and a ciggy butt in the other.

I've always said, being awful ages you early.

You're right! For example, I find your reply mesmerizing.

Is there a way that people can send donations for the commissary to the man spreading the feces in the next cell?

Can Orcas get to the canals in Venice? Asking for a friend.

Kicked my ass back to Baltic Avenue

I returned the card the next week. I'm not a total monster. It was a little bent; I had a lot of fun that night.

Not a little, but A LOT.

And I work in events, so I've seen my share of weddings. This one, in addition to being ostentatious, is kinda janky.