GNU C Mane
@beeep.computer
Turning as with serious purpose
Before stupid winds.
Before stupid winds.
I’m pitching Ocean’s 4: the least successful gang members try to steal a laundromat change machine for beer money
January 4, 2026 at 7:42 AM
I’m pitching Ocean’s 4: the least successful gang members try to steal a laundromat change machine for beer money
(scratchy, tremolo voice): from now on, they’ll produce all Black & Milds without the cancer paper
January 3, 2026 at 11:49 PM
(scratchy, tremolo voice): from now on, they’ll produce all Black & Milds without the cancer paper
I’m ready to learn my party’s extension
January 3, 2026 at 8:52 PM
I’m ready to learn my party’s extension
I'm guessing it's not illegal but you would get questioned for boarding a plane in a wingsuit
January 3, 2026 at 4:19 AM
I'm guessing it's not illegal but you would get questioned for boarding a plane in a wingsuit
Telling the dog groomer to send the chihuahua After video soundtracked to Hard in the Paint
January 2, 2026 at 10:42 PM
Telling the dog groomer to send the chihuahua After video soundtracked to Hard in the Paint
None of my guys in the Precambrian Era ever had an Action Item!!
January 1, 2026 at 11:26 PM
None of my guys in the Precambrian Era ever had an Action Item!!
Reposted by GNU C Mane
Recommending everyone try Montessori fireworks, where you rapidly turn flashlights on and off pointed at handfuls of flour thrown in the air
July 5, 2025 at 12:55 AM
Recommending everyone try Montessori fireworks, where you rapidly turn flashlights on and off pointed at handfuls of flour thrown in the air
fancy dinner, running these carrots through a julliard slicer
January 1, 2026 at 3:17 AM
fancy dinner, running these carrots through a julliard slicer
(soft spa voice): I heard you were having some trouble getting your phone on the charger? I’m Janet, from Apple, I’m the gadget doula
December 31, 2025 at 9:10 PM
(soft spa voice): I heard you were having some trouble getting your phone on the charger? I’m Janet, from Apple, I’m the gadget doula
When you are sworn in as mayor they train you to use the city’s “nuclear football” which is a button that makes all the cars honk at once
December 31, 2025 at 6:38 PM
When you are sworn in as mayor they train you to use the city’s “nuclear football” which is a button that makes all the cars honk at once
(seeing leftovers fit exactly in the container I took out of the cabinet): good eye! good eye!
December 31, 2025 at 5:38 AM
(seeing leftovers fit exactly in the container I took out of the cabinet): good eye! good eye!
(lips chapped to mosaic, marker breath): Its not a hangover, I’m just highly sensitive to lunar perigee
December 30, 2025 at 9:39 PM
(lips chapped to mosaic, marker breath): Its not a hangover, I’m just highly sensitive to lunar perigee
Reposted by GNU C Mane
stones, geese, stones, trees, dog,
December 30, 2025 at 7:14 PM
stones, geese, stones, trees, dog,
Last night was a brand activation
December 29, 2025 at 9:08 PM
Last night was a brand activation
asking my doctor if she can write me a prescription for any one of the concepts from Fight Club
December 29, 2025 at 5:52 AM
asking my doctor if she can write me a prescription for any one of the concepts from Fight Club
Reposted by GNU C Mane
John Kontrolzi invented the undo button
December 29, 2025 at 12:52 AM
John Kontrolzi invented the undo button
Villager on Bumble: “Tell me what you know about the strange lights in the forest”
December 28, 2025 at 10:13 PM
Villager on Bumble: “Tell me what you know about the strange lights in the forest”
If I were a coach I’d program my longsnapper to rocket the ball right at the opposing coach
December 28, 2025 at 8:19 PM
If I were a coach I’d program my longsnapper to rocket the ball right at the opposing coach
Huge flock of crows roosting
December 28, 2025 at 7:14 AM
Huge flock of crows roosting
(clipboard tucked under arm, clapping): places, people! places!
December 27, 2025 at 6:30 PM
(clipboard tucked under arm, clapping): places, people! places!
Decrypt the fun with your favorite codec!
December 27, 2025 at 5:38 AM
Decrypt the fun with your favorite codec!
(after being shown around the cattle farm of my little doro): cool ranch, dorito
December 27, 2025 at 2:01 AM
(after being shown around the cattle farm of my little doro): cool ranch, dorito
Asking the septum piercing barista if they have anything that bestows a passive buff
December 26, 2025 at 8:02 PM
Asking the septum piercing barista if they have anything that bestows a passive buff
if you're giving someone a ride to the airport right before you get to the exit, hit em with a "which airline my friend?"
December 25, 2025 at 10:51 PM
if you're giving someone a ride to the airport right before you get to the exit, hit em with a "which airline my friend?"
¡Próspero año y felicidad bro!
December 25, 2025 at 7:34 PM
¡Próspero año y felicidad bro!