Cryscas
@backtokatytracks.bsky.social
Gen X she/her Oklahoman, too much online. I love books, history, food, travel, music, art and ideas. Agnostic socialist with a perplexing mystical streak, Unitarian Universalist, polyamorous introvert.
I'm sternly telling myself to either become the kind of hypocrite I hate to get along with people or to stop feeling sad about not being liked. Those are my two options and I'm trying to stop feeling so bad about it. I'm not discounting that I may just actually suck as a person. No one will tell me
December 4, 2025 at 3:28 PM
I'm sternly telling myself to either become the kind of hypocrite I hate to get along with people or to stop feeling sad about not being liked. Those are my two options and I'm trying to stop feeling so bad about it. I'm not discounting that I may just actually suck as a person. No one will tell me
I'm the lady in the middle at the Tulsa No Kings protest.
October 18, 2025 at 11:41 PM
I'm the lady in the middle at the Tulsa No Kings protest.
Reposted by Cryscas
🚨 NSPM-7 🚨
🚨 New directive NSPM-7 targets "anti-capitalism," “anti-Christian,” and “anti-American" opinions as indicators of extremist violence, authorizing an army of 4,000 counter-terrorism officers to prevent crimes that haven't happened:
www.kenklippenstein.com/p/trumps-nsp...
www.kenklippenstein.com/p/trumps-nsp...
Trump’s NSPM-7 Labels Common Beliefs As Terrorism “Indicators”
New order targets “anti-Christian,” “anti-American,” and “anti-capitalism” opinions
www.kenklippenstein.com
September 28, 2025 at 10:24 PM
🚨 NSPM-7 🚨
Tonight at dinner the man behind us was being a jerk to the waiter and as we were paying my husband asked the waiter if he'd left a tip, and he had, but less than a dollar. So husband gave him an extra ten on top of his initial tip. It was the man's first table on his first night. I freaking cried.
August 10, 2025 at 1:53 AM
Tonight at dinner the man behind us was being a jerk to the waiter and as we were paying my husband asked the waiter if he'd left a tip, and he had, but less than a dollar. So husband gave him an extra ten on top of his initial tip. It was the man's first table on his first night. I freaking cried.
Valentine and Frankie pause from playing
July 27, 2025 at 7:49 PM
Valentine and Frankie pause from playing
Francisco aka Frankie. He's my new Chiweenie.
June 3, 2025 at 4:23 PM
Francisco aka Frankie. He's my new Chiweenie.
My dear sweet niece is sick in the hospital after having a seizure and I have to admit I'm so ready for awful things to stop happening every week.
June 2, 2025 at 1:36 PM
My dear sweet niece is sick in the hospital after having a seizure and I have to admit I'm so ready for awful things to stop happening every week.
Sometimes I feel like my yearning for connection is like I'm playing chess with a much better player who cuts me off at every move. I love my family, but we mostly rehash old stuff, which I like, but I need other friends. I pine, platonically, for people I used to know and love, but it isn't mutual.
May 30, 2025 at 9:27 AM
Sometimes I feel like my yearning for connection is like I'm playing chess with a much better player who cuts me off at every move. I love my family, but we mostly rehash old stuff, which I like, but I need other friends. I pine, platonically, for people I used to know and love, but it isn't mutual.
A month after my beloved dog Henry died my beloved cat William died. Yesterday I held him as he passed at the vet's office. My heart hurts pretty bad this morning. Goodbye my sweet, beautiful boy.
May 19, 2025 at 11:33 AM
A month after my beloved dog Henry died my beloved cat William died. Yesterday I held him as he passed at the vet's office. My heart hurts pretty bad this morning. Goodbye my sweet, beautiful boy.
I was going to take a brisk walk in front of my husband's shop this morning and did a major dramatic faceplant that landed me in the ER with six stitches and several bloody scrapes. My neck hurts really badly but the embarrassment is pretty bad too. It's too ridiculous to do that on Mother's Day.
May 11, 2025 at 5:50 PM
I was going to take a brisk walk in front of my husband's shop this morning and did a major dramatic faceplant that landed me in the ER with six stitches and several bloody scrapes. My neck hurts really badly but the embarrassment is pretty bad too. It's too ridiculous to do that on Mother's Day.
I feel a constant tension between getting hurt because I feel like I put in more effort to be supportive than I get in return, most of the time, so I should stop trying, and then deciding that I'm not going to let other people's behavior change who I am.
May 5, 2025 at 3:17 PM
I feel a constant tension between getting hurt because I feel like I put in more effort to be supportive than I get in return, most of the time, so I should stop trying, and then deciding that I'm not going to let other people's behavior change who I am.
One of the unexpected results of having lifelong periodic serious depression is that menopausal hormonal depression is business as usual for me. I have friends who are dealing with depression for the first time in their 50s and they don't have the coping mechanisms I do.
May 2, 2025 at 2:26 PM
One of the unexpected results of having lifelong periodic serious depression is that menopausal hormonal depression is business as usual for me. I have friends who are dealing with depression for the first time in their 50s and they don't have the coping mechanisms I do.
I got to visit my daughter last weekend and that was great but now I'm settling back into vicious sadness and I don't know what to do about it. I miss my kids and my dog. I feel alone in ways that are familiar but still difficult to handle. Asthma and the rain isn't helping much either.
April 29, 2025 at 5:11 PM
I got to visit my daughter last weekend and that was great but now I'm settling back into vicious sadness and I don't know what to do about it. I miss my kids and my dog. I feel alone in ways that are familiar but still difficult to handle. Asthma and the rain isn't helping much either.
My little dog Henry's memorial redbud.
April 18, 2025 at 2:03 PM
My little dog Henry's memorial redbud.
My neighbor who is my sister's mother-in-law is one of those cases where there's a cancer diagnosis and within a few months she's actively dying. This morning I fed her pets and although the plan was to send her home on hospice, she may not make it. My sister, by the way, might actually be a saint.
April 10, 2025 at 1:06 PM
My neighbor who is my sister's mother-in-law is one of those cases where there's a cancer diagnosis and within a few months she's actively dying. This morning I fed her pets and although the plan was to send her home on hospice, she may not make it. My sister, by the way, might actually be a saint.
My sister suggested getting a tree to plant in memorial of my sweet dog Henry who died on Sunday, so I'm getting a redbud to plant next to where he's buried. I love redbuds and I loved Henry, so it seems fitting.
April 8, 2025 at 1:48 PM
My sister suggested getting a tree to plant in memorial of my sweet dog Henry who died on Sunday, so I'm getting a redbud to plant next to where he's buried. I love redbuds and I loved Henry, so it seems fitting.
Many people I love best feel guilty about things they can't control, so much so that I'm wondering if I'm a bad person for trying not to do that. My sister can't make her MIL cancer free, my husband can't control larger forces, my oldest can't change her dad. Yet they feel responsible and it's sad.
April 6, 2025 at 2:27 PM
Many people I love best feel guilty about things they can't control, so much so that I'm wondering if I'm a bad person for trying not to do that. My sister can't make her MIL cancer free, my husband can't control larger forces, my oldest can't change her dad. Yet they feel responsible and it's sad.
Today is one of those days when I feel like I'm going mad with grief. I'm always worried that voicing my feelings is going to look performative, but sometimes it's so pressing I do it anyway. The horrors of what my country is allowing to happen, I feel them in my heart and my stomach.
March 30, 2025 at 5:14 PM
Today is one of those days when I feel like I'm going mad with grief. I'm always worried that voicing my feelings is going to look performative, but sometimes it's so pressing I do it anyway. The horrors of what my country is allowing to happen, I feel them in my heart and my stomach.
Josephina snuggles into my neck
March 16, 2025 at 10:32 PM
Josephina snuggles into my neck
I've met interesting people because I occasionally get the irresistible urge to write erotica. And, a big factor in marrying all three of my husbands was they were really good in bed. Yet, I still get apologies when someone swears in front of me. I have a filthy mind and mouth too, I promise.
March 8, 2025 at 2:11 PM
I've met interesting people because I occasionally get the irresistible urge to write erotica. And, a big factor in marrying all three of my husbands was they were really good in bed. Yet, I still get apologies when someone swears in front of me. I have a filthy mind and mouth too, I promise.
I've tended towards melancholy my whole life, but the deep grief I feel right now is a little different because I actually know what's wrong. I'm at the intersection of being weird and sad and it isn't helping with trying to be less isolated.
March 6, 2025 at 3:12 PM
I've tended towards melancholy my whole life, but the deep grief I feel right now is a little different because I actually know what's wrong. I'm at the intersection of being weird and sad and it isn't helping with trying to be less isolated.
Yesterday I had a good day but today I'm paying for it with a vicious sadness. Last year I watched my country enable and cheer on a genocide and this year my country is being ripped apart, and part of me can see the justice in it, but part is grieving heavily because it didn't have to be this way.
February 26, 2025 at 4:14 PM
Yesterday I had a good day but today I'm paying for it with a vicious sadness. Last year I watched my country enable and cheer on a genocide and this year my country is being ripped apart, and part of me can see the justice in it, but part is grieving heavily because it didn't have to be this way.
The man I'm married to now is my third husband, and I wish I had understood earlier that the kind of moody man I'm always initially attracted to was never going to be right for me. His optimism and steady good humor frequently pull me out of the funks.
February 20, 2025 at 2:04 PM
The man I'm married to now is my third husband, and I wish I had understood earlier that the kind of moody man I'm always initially attracted to was never going to be right for me. His optimism and steady good humor frequently pull me out of the funks.
The cats cuddle when it's cold.
February 19, 2025 at 4:51 PM
The cats cuddle when it's cold.
The frustration I feel over Oklahoma political nonsense is overwhelming. Sometimes I think a policy to harm would have to call out a person by name, and outline point by point the way it will be harmful, in simple language, and then repeated several times, for some people to start to understand.
February 9, 2025 at 3:34 PM
The frustration I feel over Oklahoma political nonsense is overwhelming. Sometimes I think a policy to harm would have to call out a person by name, and outline point by point the way it will be harmful, in simple language, and then repeated several times, for some people to start to understand.