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Its not so much a loss, but a life long lived with grief. Thank yiu

I may publish a poetry book...or on my patreon someday but for now Ill just nurture myself and work on improving them. Thank you for your encouragement and kindness.

This is true. I know my loved ones wouldnt want me to feel so much pain. I miss the ones who are gone and am grateful for those with me. But nonetheless, grief still does possess me, at times. I felt that articulating my thoughts might help others who may be struggling as well. Thank you, Lori

As ever, James Baldwin has a quote for whatever vibe you're feeling.

Sometimes they do. Sometimes I get pulled under again.

I am reading "How to do the Work," by Dr. Nicole LePera. I was drawn to it, so hoping it helps. Some passages have been, some not. Thank you for your kind support, it's helpful. Random kindness matters, no matter how big or small!

thank you

beyond my own. I suppose the only thing that has ever helped me wade out of grief was knowing that many people, throughout history have dealt with profound feelings if sadness, heartbreak and misery. I only wish we lived in a kinder world. We don't. We just try the best we can. But it's so hard.

I would suppose that is why I was so drawn to the news so many years ago as a young woman. Whatevr grief I felt, I could look at past or present news and find others in inextricable grief and I felt less alone knowing how much other people suffered so. It made more empathetic and aware of cultures

and when I stop thinking about my own grief, I imagine how many other people in the world feel the same sense of profound, grief that exists beyond words. Exists beyond the bounds of time, being a human being navigating a complicated world with a beating heart and a wish for a better life.

And when the waves of grief subside I am back to myself, content and reasonably happy. But my grief is like an ever looming shadow. It creeps up on me, choking me and I find myself in tears. And I feel no shame for it. I simply accept that is how I feel. There is no solution to grief, it just is

But sometimes my grief is so powerful, it shakes me. I iust cannot escape it. It pulls me under, and I feel so lost and helpless and I know I am not. This has not been my best semester and I feel bad about that. But at the same time I cannot truly express how hard it is to just live and breathe

I cant make it beautiful. Because its not. It is ugly and it hurts deeply. And I am not sure my grief will ever truly leave me, as hard as I try. I don't have big dreams. I only want to be able to care for myself and see my own potential realized. To do what I can to make others feel safe and loved