Adriana Porter Felt
@apf.bsky.social
I like writing silly skeets, but that doesn't pay so I also make Google Chrome. mamá, Eng Director, volunteer at Second Harvest. 🇺🇲🇨🇷
Twitter: @__apf__
Twitter: @__apf__
Pinned
Adriana Porter Felt
@apf.bsky.social
· Jan 23
wow the entwives have really fallen on hard times to be out here hustling like this
can anyone suggest a good name for my new cat? she's a little standoffish but I'm sure I'll have her living indoors soon enough
June 7, 2025 at 8:37 PM
can anyone suggest a good name for my new cat? she's a little standoffish but I'm sure I'll have her living indoors soon enough
Reposted by Adriana Porter Felt
From The Archives: You People Made Me Give Up My Peanut Farm Before I Got To Be President theonion.com/you-peo...
May 12, 2025 at 2:00 PM
From The Archives: You People Made Me Give Up My Peanut Farm Before I Got To Be President theonion.com/you-peo...
doodle's mobile website layout was inspired by recipe bloggers. they did a great job, it really captures the same strong emotional response (desire to throw phone). and isn't that what art is?
May 9, 2025 at 3:48 AM
doodle's mobile website layout was inspired by recipe bloggers. they did a great job, it really captures the same strong emotional response (desire to throw phone). and isn't that what art is?
a- almost? ALMOST always? i guess even skynet sees the value of a community college education
May 8, 2025 at 12:15 PM
a- almost? ALMOST always? i guess even skynet sees the value of a community college education
I bought a gift from a company that's using AI customer service. It hallucinated delivery dates: telling me dates in the past, then far in the future, then next week. Even worse... 🧵
May 7, 2025 at 2:51 PM
I bought a gift from a company that's using AI customer service. It hallucinated delivery dates: telling me dates in the past, then far in the future, then next week. Even worse... 🧵
my cat has big trump energy. he made a problem by prising open our cat door at 5am and letting raccoons in. after scaring the raccoons off, he presented himself as the hero with a pile of raccoon destruction behind him. there would have been no raccoons inside at all if not for you, Mr Noodle
April 29, 2025 at 3:29 PM
my cat has big trump energy. he made a problem by prising open our cat door at 5am and letting raccoons in. after scaring the raccoons off, he presented himself as the hero with a pile of raccoon destruction behind him. there would have been no raccoons inside at all if not for you, Mr Noodle
when we first moved to an oak forest, I thought I would have to plant more oaks for future generations. what hubris! there were already caretakers here. the squirrels and scrub jays plant approximately 500 acorns a year, and my only job is to not destroy the saplings they grow. happy Earth Day
April 22, 2025 at 2:49 PM
when we first moved to an oak forest, I thought I would have to plant more oaks for future generations. what hubris! there were already caretakers here. the squirrels and scrub jays plant approximately 500 acorns a year, and my only job is to not destroy the saplings they grow. happy Earth Day
Reposted by Adriana Porter Felt
Reposted by Adriana Porter Felt
so they're mycoblogging
April 21, 2025 at 12:15 AM
so they're mycoblogging
Reposted by Adriana Porter Felt
🗽 PSA for naturalised citizens: If you never got a new social security card when you became a citizen, and your existing card has "valid for work only with ins/dns authorization" you are likely still in the Social Security database as a non-citizen.
April 20, 2025 at 2:07 AM
🗽 PSA for naturalised citizens: If you never got a new social security card when you became a citizen, and your existing card has "valid for work only with ins/dns authorization" you are likely still in the Social Security database as a non-citizen.
Reposted by Adriana Porter Felt
¿Vives en La Ciudad de México? CDMX Google is hiring! 👩💻🇲🇽
Hey all, we are hiring at Google on my team in Core- if you're interested in infrastructure at scale, here are some of the openings!
google.com/about/career...
google.com/about/career...
Senior Software Engineer, Developer Tools, Core — Google Careers
google.com
April 18, 2025 at 3:13 PM
¿Vives en La Ciudad de México? CDMX Google is hiring! 👩💻🇲🇽
getting ready to make five kids and a dozen local raccoons very happy
April 18, 2025 at 3:19 PM
getting ready to make five kids and a dozen local raccoons very happy
if you see me today please high-five me for the ultimate mid-30s achievement: I estimated my 2024 taxes almost perfectly
April 10, 2025 at 3:58 PM
if you see me today please high-five me for the ultimate mid-30s achievement: I estimated my 2024 taxes almost perfectly
I am allergic to cats, but we can get outside mousers and keep them out of the house. Ok, they'll be indoors but not in my bedroom. Well, not in my bed. In the bed but only by my feet. On my head but I'll turn my face the other direction. Ok directly on my face
April 4, 2025 at 11:36 AM
I am allergic to cats, but we can get outside mousers and keep them out of the house. Ok, they'll be indoors but not in my bedroom. Well, not in my bed. In the bed but only by my feet. On my head but I'll turn my face the other direction. Ok directly on my face
the most important step when purchasing something online is to leave it in your foyer or kitchen in an open box for 2-4 weeks so you can fully acclimate to each other. it's ideal if you place it somewhere that your feet go regularly so that you really get to know each other
April 2, 2025 at 2:36 AM
the most important step when purchasing something online is to leave it in your foyer or kitchen in an open box for 2-4 weeks so you can fully acclimate to each other. it's ideal if you place it somewhere that your feet go regularly so that you really get to know each other
thought I was going insane because the brand new box of raisin bran I bought last night had no raisins in it. turns out in the intervening 12h between night and morning my husband had eaten the WHOLE box and snuck out to get replacement cereal
March 30, 2025 at 2:56 AM
thought I was going insane because the brand new box of raisin bran I bought last night had no raisins in it. turns out in the intervening 12h between night and morning my husband had eaten the WHOLE box and snuck out to get replacement cereal
👶🏼: give me a number
👩🏻: ok, 3
👶🏼: I'm giving you 256
👩🏻: great. what are we doing with these? multiplying them?
👶🏼: you can do whatever you want with yours, it's a gift
👩🏻: ok, 3
👶🏼: I'm giving you 256
👩🏻: great. what are we doing with these? multiplying them?
👶🏼: you can do whatever you want with yours, it's a gift
March 17, 2025 at 7:47 PM
👶🏼: give me a number
👩🏻: ok, 3
👶🏼: I'm giving you 256
👩🏻: great. what are we doing with these? multiplying them?
👶🏼: you can do whatever you want with yours, it's a gift
👩🏻: ok, 3
👶🏼: I'm giving you 256
👩🏻: great. what are we doing with these? multiplying them?
👶🏼: you can do whatever you want with yours, it's a gift
hotel designers heard our wish for more family time together. unfortunately, like mischievous genies, they took us too literally. my hotel room's toilet has no door and faces directly into the rest of the room so we can have time together while pooping
March 16, 2025 at 8:46 AM
hotel designers heard our wish for more family time together. unfortunately, like mischievous genies, they took us too literally. my hotel room's toilet has no door and faces directly into the rest of the room so we can have time together while pooping
I have discovered something worse than traveling with a child with jet lag: it is traveling with a child who does not have jet lag whatsoever
March 15, 2025 at 8:00 PM
I have discovered something worse than traveling with a child with jet lag: it is traveling with a child who does not have jet lag whatsoever
a few years ago I snuck out of my family's hotel room for a nice quiet breakfast alone with a book. during this breakfast an 8ft tall man in a dog suit kept approaching me. this is how I found out I'd accidentally booked a character breakfast with Goofy for one
March 14, 2025 at 8:38 PM
a few years ago I snuck out of my family's hotel room for a nice quiet breakfast alone with a book. during this breakfast an 8ft tall man in a dog suit kept approaching me. this is how I found out I'd accidentally booked a character breakfast with Goofy for one
Dear all American men between 2000 and 2025,
I apologize for making fun of your cargo pants. I got a pair of yardwork pants with side pockets, and I love them. I find that placing pockets higher on the leg with no flap is superior, but let us not argue about doctrine.
Sincerely,
A cargo convert
I apologize for making fun of your cargo pants. I got a pair of yardwork pants with side pockets, and I love them. I find that placing pockets higher on the leg with no flap is superior, but let us not argue about doctrine.
Sincerely,
A cargo convert
March 12, 2025 at 9:09 PM
Dear all American men between 2000 and 2025,
I apologize for making fun of your cargo pants. I got a pair of yardwork pants with side pockets, and I love them. I find that placing pockets higher on the leg with no flap is superior, but let us not argue about doctrine.
Sincerely,
A cargo convert
I apologize for making fun of your cargo pants. I got a pair of yardwork pants with side pockets, and I love them. I find that placing pockets higher on the leg with no flap is superior, but let us not argue about doctrine.
Sincerely,
A cargo convert
I'm intrigued by the backstory for this ad: two people, one meal. is the man going to watch his girlfriend eat a salad? do they alternate bites on the single fork? I, personally, only go to hotels where everyone gets their own set of utensils
March 11, 2025 at 6:02 PM
I'm intrigued by the backstory for this ad: two people, one meal. is the man going to watch his girlfriend eat a salad? do they alternate bites on the single fork? I, personally, only go to hotels where everyone gets their own set of utensils
When Capt Cook arrived in Hawaii in 1779, the Hawaiians were celebrating a festival. His ship sails happened to be shaped like a banner from their myth. This led to confusion. Can you imagine if Martians rolled up and their spaceship happened to look like the Starship Enterprise by coincidence?
March 11, 2025 at 4:24 AM
When Capt Cook arrived in Hawaii in 1779, the Hawaiians were celebrating a festival. His ship sails happened to be shaped like a banner from their myth. This led to confusion. Can you imagine if Martians rolled up and their spaceship happened to look like the Starship Enterprise by coincidence?
expected number of turkeys on my roof: 0
actual number of turkeys on my roof: 6
actual number of turkeys on my roof: 6
March 8, 2025 at 6:35 PM
expected number of turkeys on my roof: 0
actual number of turkeys on my roof: 6
actual number of turkeys on my roof: 6
what is wrong with my brain. why did I briefly consider whether I might need a hundred headless manikins
Bloomingdale's in downtown SF is going out with a mannequin clearance sale. Following its official closure announcement in January, the massive 330,000-square-foot store has been liquidating its entire inventory — furniture, fixtures, and even its army of stylish, plastic employees.
March 7, 2025 at 8:26 PM
what is wrong with my brain. why did I briefly consider whether I might need a hundred headless manikins