Andrew J. Eisenman
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andrewjeisenman.bsky.social
Andrew J. Eisenman
@andrewjeisenman.bsky.social
480 followers 1.2K following 830 posts
Writer not a Poster // Filmmaker and Film Critic // Member @ncfilmcritics.bsky.social //
Contributor @elmntsofmadness.bsky.social
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andrewjeisenman.bsky.social
Now Seated for Jelly Kelly
George Clooney poster for Jay Kelly
November 11, 2025 at 11:48 PM
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Softlaunching my own newsletter on @beehiiv.com — PONTIFICATOR! with my review of Edgar Wright’s THE RUNNING MAN, a film that’s really fun but not quite great.

Subscribe and such.

www.pontificator.org/p/the-runnin...
“THE RUNNING MAN” RUNS AWAY AT THE END Has Edgar Wright ever truly suffered? One must assume that he has, but it remains the thought I woke with after last night's screening of The Running Man. It's a real movie-star thrill ride from Glen Powell (Hit Man, Twisters) and a solid double from Wright (Scott Pilgrim vs. the World, Hot Fuzz), but its laudable anti-facist, anti-capitalist politics are undercut by a lifeless production design and third act that runs out of breath. The Running Man follows Powell as Ben Richards, a good, angry man. He's been blacklisted from working because he stood up for his coworkers' safety. Now, his daughter is dying of the flu, and his wife is starting to compromise her boundaries as a waitress just to buy pain meds.. The only way to a better life is to compete in dangerous reality TV shows, including The Running Man, where 3 contestants are hunted for lethal sport. ...critics say that The Running Man signals a return to the barbarism of the Roman Colosseum." Maybe Wright is entering a new phase of his style that started with Last Night in Soho 2022) — a third film will make a trend - but the frantic camera that made him famous is now balletic, and not quite painterly. Graphic novel-y? The colors and compositions are pop art, even when the story calls instead for pulp; the plastic sheen of eshitification retards attempts at critique. There is a moment where the masked men hunting Powell charge towards the camera in front of a Patton-esque American flag. What should be a moment of horrific triumph is instead an empty splash page. What's not empty is Glen Powell's performance, which sits next to Hit Man (2023) as one of his best. There is a marked difference in this life between the anger of a rich man and a poor man when they are insulted, and Powell's seething anger is brilliantly accurate and entertaining. It's his reactions to the insults of Josh Brolin's (Hail Caesar, No Country for Old Men) billionaire character and the various indignities of his life that make this film a fun time at the movies. It's refreshing to say that a film is worth your time just to watch a fun performance, but that's what being a movie star is really all about. Jayme Lawson (Sinners, How to Blow Up a Pipeline) is hitting homers every time the film remembers to let her act in her small role as the wife, and Emilia Jones (Task, Coda) is also very good in her too-limited screen time. In general, all of the performances are up is onan here, but as the movie races towards the end, you can feel
November 11, 2025 at 11:32 PM
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Wake up New York City, something actually important is happening:

Jonah Feingold’s very good rom-com 31 CANDLES arrives this weekend!

Read the full review 👇🗽🕎🎄❤️
"31 Candles" illuminates male loneliness. BY ANDREW J. EISENMAN on NOVEMBER 5, 2025 • 9 (0) "Have you talked to [Redacted] lately" is a question that many mothers love to haunt their single children with. "What about [Redacted]," "I just ran into [Redacted] at the grocery store," "[Redacted] was at urch today," or, as kicks off the plot of 31 Candles, "Ava Shapiro's going to be there." Jonah Feingold's (EXmas; Good to See You) lates, entry in his crusade to revive the "big city rom-com" follows a parody of himself, Leo, as he hatches a hairbrained scheme to seduce his childhood crush, Eva, played by Sara Coffey (Queens of the Dead; Devil's Workshop). Many summers ago, she may or may not have given him an over-the-pants handjob at "Jew Camp" before ghosting him in an AOL chatroom. Now, she's an actress trying to break onto Broadway while teaching bar mitzvah classes; lessons that lovesick Leo never learned. "People do crazy things when they have a crush" Many are the early directing careers hampered by immature self-insert work, but Feingold has in his arsenal one of the fine comedic tools: the ability to nail himself to the wall. Where he once directed EXmas (2023) for Amazon, he finds plenty of great jokes in a Jewish bachelor directing The Christmas Kiss for an online retailer. In front of his camera, an actress character played hilariously by NYC Comedian Megan Bitchell (Rent Free) gives her all to make a bad scene work. Afterwards, Leo returns to his unhappy situationship, where he and his lover Molly, played by Djouliet Amara (Hello, Goodbye and Everything in Between; Seance), finally label their relationship as "undefined". He's belittled by his parents for not having a real job or a real girlfriend. His grandmother teases him for his not-so-secret-romanticism, and he wears lifts in his shoes to seem taller on his bad app dates. In fact, the biggest belly-laugh the film gave was the first wide shot of Leo and Eva standing next to each other, Eva patiently towering over Leo as he looks up at her with puppy dog eyes; an obvious mismatch that lays out just how much scheming Leo will have to hatch in order to fulfill his bar mitzvah mission and find "real love". "You are not in the way of finding real love because real love is not what I'm looking for." While most rom-coms are two-handers, 31 Candles deconstructs the one-sided objectification central to the unrequited crush. It doesn't seek to explore this the way its contemporary films, I Like Movies (2023) or The Threesome (2023) would by letting us see the burden of idealization from the woman's perspective. Instead, 31 Candles remains critical in and of the man's point of view as he works through his feelings. Instructive but not liberating. Some will find the knowing perspective compellin realized, and others will, fairly so, find it alienating. What holds it all together is the depth of Sarah Coffey's performance. Ava Shapiro feels fully formed as a person, even when we don't get to see her full agency. In hiding her pain from us, the absurdity of Leo's incumosity becomes painfully transparent. The schemes that we hatch in order to get closer to crushes are rooted in insecurity, not desire. Real love waits behind doors never opened and flees from doors forced open. In an era where dating is commodified by corporations, 31 Candles is a rom-com for our time, breaking down the men who expect love to arrive customized. There is no male loneliness epidemic, there's a male expectation epidemic. So, to set a
November 5, 2025 at 1:55 PM
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Will Eisner draws Darth Vader on the toilet reading “How to Win Friends”
October 24, 2025 at 4:47 PM
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BARTON FINK on 8mm. Watching through the Coens has been a real blast.
October 17, 2025 at 2:30 PM
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Blank Check is 1/3 a Washington Post.
Blank Check - 31,410 patreon subscribers
October 14, 2025 at 2:19 PM
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truly, thank you for this
guy fieri saying “I'm just thinking, this is all going to go down the drain.”
October 7, 2025 at 10:58 PM
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Good movie alert!

Read the full review at Elements of Madness, then if you’re in a big city, change your plans for tonight.

If you live anywhere else, read the review a 2nd time instead.

elementsofmadness.com/2025/10/02/j...
The Onion's mockumentary short "Jeffery Epstein: Bad Pedophile" is courageously funny. BY ANDREW J. EISENMAN on OCTOBER 2, 2025 • P(0) The famed satirists at The Onion have joked their way into becoming a widely-read newspaper in just over a year of physical publication, to which, for disclosure, this author is a proud subscriber. They've also resurrected their video production team, which is what led to the creation of their latest theatrical short film, Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile, screening in select theaters for one day only, October 2nd, 2025. "It was a complete molestation of justice." The film is a parody of the true-crime documentary format, replete with talking head interviews, audio tapes played over self-serious macro photography, and focusing on the inner life of the serial perpetrator, not the victims - a very good genre parody. It's a light snack of a laugh, the same way the paper is, lifting spirits with a chuckle and sometimes even a chortle. At just over 20 minutes, it's packaged theatrically with an older Onion production, the reality dating TV parody Sex House (2012). Funny programming. But what would have been a fairly uneventful release for diehard fans has become a terrible meta prank on The Onion as Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile has become a victim of one of Epstein's friends, Donald Trump. • elementsofmadness.com The famed satirists at The Onion have joked their way into becoming a widely-read newspaper in just over a year of physical publication, to which, for disclosure, this author is a proud subscriber. They've also resurrected their video production team, which is what led to the creation of their latest theatrical short film, Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile, screening in select theaters for one day only, October 2nd, 2025. "It was a complete molestation of justice." The film is a parody of the true-crime documentary format, replete with talking head interviews, audio tapes played over self-serious macro photography, and focusing on the inner life of the serial perpetrator, not the victims - a very good genre parody. It's a light snack of a laugh, the same way the paper is, lifting spirits with a chuckle and sometimes even a chortle. At just over 20 minutes, it's packaged theatrically with an older Onion production, the reality dati TV parody Sex House (2012). Funny programming. But what would have been a fairly uneventful release for diehard fans has become a terrible meta prank on The Onion as Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile has become a victim of one of Epstein's friends, Donald Trump. @ elementsofmadness.com
October 2, 2025 at 6:24 PM
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It’s been a real week
Letterboxd last four watched in reverse order: The Pentagon Papers, One Battle After Another, Fixed, and The Post
September 30, 2025 at 2:47 AM
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Zazlov didn’t bend the knee hard enough and let OBAAA slip out. Now it’s going to be the same tariff playbook - pay a bribe, or really, install a MAGA censor.

Disney silence Ruffalo to shoot in the UK, no more ANDORs. WB get in line. Sony Netflix & Apple next.

Indie film is the lethal target.
Donald J. Trump© @realDonald Trump Our movie making business has been stolen from the United States of America, by other Countries, just like stealing "candy from a baby." California, with its weak and incompetent Governor, has been particularly hard hit! Therefore, in order to solve this long time, never ending problem, I will be imposing a 100% Tariff on any and all movies that are made outside of the United States. Thank you for your attention to this matter. MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! President DJT
September 29, 2025 at 1:28 PM
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The greatest to ever do it
Lights Camera Jackson on Twitter: #OneBattleAfterAnother is style over substance. PTA's direction is solid (shot composition, staging) and I can get behind the music. But most scenes are either too far-fetched or too light in tone. Over the top Leo again. Heightened experience that feels like one run-on sentence. 5:14 PM • Sep 25, 2025 • 211.7K Views
September 26, 2025 at 11:34 PM
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One of the great closeups.
September 16, 2025 at 12:42 PM
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Thought a lot about this while revisiting TRON last night.
9:39 Andrew J. 73 Review 000 Andrew J. Eisenman PATRON Tron 1982 *** TRON Rewatched Aug 21, 2025 A lazy business executive following Al instructions locks his own workers out of their system, allows the Al to pull data from government agencies he has no legal clearance for, and rejects the advice of his greatest scientists as he takes the word of a computer program as Holy-truth with religious fervor. As Peter Thiel prepares to preach a lecture series on "the Biblical Anti-Christ," drawing from Nazi theologians to impart a new understanding of divinity and human dignity on the men who can move minds with a few lines of code, the torment nexus once again walks out of a sub-par sci-fi story.
August 22, 2025 at 1:42 PM
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This November, our long national crisis comes to an end
EYES WIDE SHUT CRITERION BBY
August 18, 2025 at 5:30 PM
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CROSSING DELANCEY was my closing-day Criterion Sale pickup this year, and I had such a wonderful time I had to pick up BETWEEN THE LINES., which absolutely rules. Joan Micklin Silver forever.

boxd.it/aLAowF
Blu-ray for Joan Micklin Silver’s wonderful sophomore film, BETWEEN THE LINES
August 17, 2025 at 5:37 PM
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marty blowing on a ball
August 13, 2025 at 1:19 PM
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Gotta pay just to see this
Timmy catch ball with breath
August 13, 2025 at 1:08 PM
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Chalamete catching a ping-pong ball with his breath
August 13, 2025 at 1:07 PM
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Now I just know this moments’ gonna bring the house down
Timothy Chalamete catching a ping-pong ball with his breath
August 13, 2025 at 1:03 PM
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Oh, I meant eyeing it on the shelf. I don’t slouch on my que, I stay a film ahead.
Signed copy of Crooklyn next to “the que”
August 6, 2025 at 1:42 AM
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Found it, just despicable what they’re doing at The Sphere, treating corpses like puppets, and craft like accidents.
July 27, 2025 at 5:40 PM
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evergreen
July 18, 2025 at 6:30 PM
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Evergreen
July 18, 2025 at 2:22 AM
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Lotta movies throwing around promises they don’t intend on delivering these days. Does it matter as long as they’re good?
"Abraham's Boys: A Dracula Story" twists itself in knots. BY ANDREW). EISENMAN On JULY 12, 2025 • (0) There have been a slew of films hiding their true premises in their trailers this year - not spoiler-level twists, just selling the public a different idea. Abraham's Boys is right there with Sinners, vaterialists, 28 Years Later, and The Life of Chuck, all good to great movies with distributors who think the films will come off as too highfalutin, preachy, or boring, having no trust in their ability to capture audiences. Abraham's Boys is the worst of the trend, but it remains a good film despite sunburnt wings. The last few years have brought us Dracula on a Boat, Dracula in a Fur Coat, and now Dracula Smote. The film follows the survivors of Bram Stoker's Dracula novel 18 years after its final chapters, and it is an immaculate meditation on fear that won't go away. "Abraham's Boys: A Dracula Story" twists itself in knots. BY ANDREW). EISENMAN On JULY 12, 2025 • (0) There have been a slew of films hiding their true premises in their trailers this year - not spoiler-level twists, just selling the public a different idea. Abraham's Boys is right there with Sinners, Materialists, 28 Years Later, and The Life of Chuck, all good to great movies with distributors who think the films will come off as too highfalutin, preachy, or boring, aving no trust in their ability to capture audiences. Abraham's Boys is the worst of the trend, but it remains a good film despite sunburnt wings. The last few years have brought us Dracula on a Boat, Dracula in a Fur Coat, and now Dracula Smote. The film follows the survivors of Bram Stoker's Dracula novel 18 years after its final chapters, and it is an immaculate meditation on fear that won't go away.
July 16, 2025 at 8:59 PM
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EEPHUS is out on Blu-ray, and after seeing it on a perfect Sunday afternoon earlier this year, I’m pleased to say it delivers on what might be the most Sunday-afternoon commentary track ever made.

My latest at Elements of Madness:

elementsofmadness.com/2025/07/14/e...
"Eephus" hits a homer on Blu-ray. BY ANDREW J. EISENMAN on JULY 14, 2025 • P(0) Eephus (2024), now out on Blu-ray, is a great An rican movie because, like America's Favorite Pastime, t captures the ways we can be and have forgotten how to be - communal, patient, and honorable, surprisingly loud, and sometimes surprisingly quiet and intimate. L-R: Ari Brisbon, Patrick Garrigan, Brendand "Crash" Burt, and Russel J. Gannon in Carson Lund's 2024 slow cinema sports drama EEPHUS. Photo courtesy of Music Box Films. Set in the 1990s, Eephus is something new about something old, a slow-cinema sports film about the middle-aged men who spend their Sunday afternoons playing rec (recreational) league baseball instead of talking to their kids, and the people who watch them • elementsofmadness.com the season and of their old ball field. One of the players, Stephen Radochia's (Consumed; Katie Ffordé: Ziemlich beste Freundinnen) Graham, has been hired to bulldoze it and construct an elementary school on the land. The old makes way for the new as time marches on, but these old men persist nonetheless. "Hotdogs will always be here, and that's a good thing." "Eephus" is the name of a tricky pitch that moves so slowly that it's difficult to pin down, and so the film is aptly named. The lead character of the film is a local score-keeper ramed Franny, astonishingly brought to life by Cliff Blake (Poor Glenna; A Fire Called Jeremiah). According to cinematographer-turned-director Carson Lund (Christmas Eve in Miller's Point; Ham on Rye), Franny became the lead in the editing room, not on the page. The shifting nature of who we are when we're together and the excuses we make to be together fuels the film at every level. It is an immaculate work of art, and it has received an immaculate Blu-ray fitting its careful compositions and local cast members. 4:54 • 5G (33) This release sports two commentaries. The director (and producer) commentary is, of course, detaile ind thoughtful, worthy of anyone's Sunday afternoon. But it's the cast commentary that reminds one of the best days spent playing with friends, sporting a whopping 10 members of the ensemble cast on the track at once. not in post-edited sections like most high-speaner-count commentaries. It is raucous and entertaining in a way very few special features are. There are other features that cinephiles will be thrilled by as well, such as Lund's one-of-a-kind Photoshop storyboards, the only set of on-set-photography I've actually enjoyed clicking through, and a wild interview with famous leftist and Eephus-throwing southpaw pitcher Bill "Spaceman" Lee about his role and life. But what this Music Box release does right is what the best physical media releases do: it gets you to spend time in its world. Eephus is a film made for pondering, remembering, and rewatching, growing in complexity with every passing moment and earning its place among the best films released in the last year. "It's getting late early out here." A note on the special edition and the standard: There is a special edition that comes with a pack of baseball cards starring both teams. It looks real neat, but it was not sent to Elements of Madness for review, much to this reviewer's sorrow. Otherwise, the releases are the same. Eephus Special Features: • Filmmaker Commentary with director Carson Lund, co-writer/producer Mike Basta and D.P Greg Tango @ elementsofmadness.com
July 16, 2025 at 8:58 PM