Santa's Little Alvar
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alvartheo.bsky.social
Santa's Little Alvar
@alvartheo.bsky.social
91 followers 100 following 250 posts
Writerman, writerman, that's what writerman does.
Benothinged out now from Haunt.

https://www.hauntpublishing.com/books/p/alvar-theo/benothinged/9781915691095
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alvartheo.bsky.social
Watching a horny movie about a smoking-hot bi dude banging everyone on a military base in Alaska but now an alien's turned up or something?
Captain Hendry in The Thing From Another World 1951
November 6, 2025 at 4:08 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
Transition goals
Black and white shot of Christopher Ryan as Mike in The Young Ones. He's sitting on a wall wearing a pinstripe suit with a large tie and oversized shades. He's just over 5 foot tall and really looks it in this pic.
October 24, 2025 at 4:02 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
Unfortunate cropping of my fun Halloween username here
Pinned post has cropped my name to read Alvarnt to suck you followed by an ellipsis.
October 1, 2025 at 8:58 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
I love Soreen loaves but the packaging makes me so uncomfortable
Close up of blue packaging. Reads Top Me However You Like! With little white splashes around the writing. Also says best before 14/9/25 which was yesterday so I'll be having Sainsbury's about that. How to enjoy me: toast me under the grill, spread me with butter, top me with sliced banana or just enjoy me as I come. Tell everyone how you ate me on Instagram, Twitter Squidgy enough for you?
September 15, 2025 at 1:26 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
New books 📚💙
Lucky Day Chuck Tingle, Ballad of Sword and Wine 4, The Husky and his White Cat Shizun 9, Joyful Reunion 1, Kei x Yaku 2, Minato's Laundromat 2, Training Mister Sakuranda.
August 30, 2025 at 6:04 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
Mylo demanding treats last night (we'd run out). Didn't appreciate the significance of him standing on @tkingfisher.com's book until someone pointed it out to me this morning.
Handsome tuxedo cat with a menacing aura sat on my bedroom floor glowering. He has one paw on a copy of What Feasts at Night by T Kingfisher, presumably to get his point across.
August 27, 2025 at 5:14 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
If anyone was wondering what I do all day, it's this:
Me and the cat lying in bed. He is a handsome tuxedo cat lying on my open notebook with his back pressed against my side. I'm barely in shot, just a bit of my Adventure Time t-shirt and elbow with tattoos either side. Tattoos are cogs and a mountain scene.
August 26, 2025 at 9:26 AM
alvartheo.bsky.social
1st Freddie anniversary! He was tiny.
Blonde shepsky puppy lying on floor with his head up. He's smiling. His ears are turned down which I don't remember. My dad's arm with his shit tattoos is also in shot. Same dog grown up. Massive now. Longer, more straggly hair. Especially around his ears which now point up. Tongue hanging out a little. He's lying half on me on the sofa. My arm is in the shot. My tattoos are good.
August 5, 2025 at 2:22 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
Advertise your book with cover and content warnings only.

Gaslighting, Gore, Stalking, Body horror, Violence, Grief, Suicidal thoughts, Dementia, Mental illness, Death of parent, Chronic illness, Addiction, Ableism, Acephobia/Arophobia, Terminal illness, Emotional abuse, Abandonment
Benothinged by Alvar Theo. Cover shows a skeletal face under a hood. A hand half covers the face. Forget me nots grow in the eye socket and through the broken jaw bone. White spirals and red ribbon hang at the top. A white banner with the title and author name at the bottom. Cover art by Phasemoth.
July 21, 2025 at 8:46 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
Still from the cartoon James Bond Jr showing the title character, a young white guy with brown hair, wearing a tux. The title of the show is next to him in sassy 90s shades of yellow and orange.
June 27, 2025 at 6:22 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
Post a picture of when your pet was little
Little blonde shepsky posing like a model in my back garden. Head tilted at a jaunty angle. He knows he's gorgeous. Very tiny curly haired doodle sitting upright in the living room. Mostly black with white chest. Big brown eyes.
June 25, 2025 at 7:12 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
A house full of handsome boys
(Need to chase the cat down for a pic later)
Light brown/white/yellow shepsky doodle lying on an ottoman with his big paws dangling over the front. Mad whispy hair all over his ears. Weird looking dog tbh. Small handsome doodle, mostly black with white chest and beard. Sitting on the floor and looking off to the left with sad little eyes. I don't remember what food I had when I took this but he obviously wanted it.
June 9, 2025 at 11:19 AM
alvartheo.bsky.social
Cor be arsed wi this
Headline reading Queen Elizabeth's final diary entry contained only five words
May 10, 2025 at 12:02 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
Discount Easter shit well into May. Sometimes good things happen 🙏
Asda Free From Chunky Choc and Confetti Bar and OMV Choc orange and caramel crisp Easter egg.
May 4, 2025 at 4:17 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
Recent book purchases.
Did everyone else know there was a Manner of Death manga?
Birds of Shangri-la 1 + 2; Takara's Treasure; Manner of Death 1; Stay by my side in the rain 1; Why I adopted my husband; Glitterland; Legend of Exorcism 1; The husky and his white cat shizun 6; Remnants of Filth 6.
May 3, 2025 at 1:52 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
I bought pretty things in town
3 A5 art prints: ginger cat in a field saying spread kindness like wildflowers; grey cat in blue mist saying stay weird; crow in flight with a banner saying do no harm, take no shit. Postcard showing a unicorn with non-binary coloured banner saying wrath. Cat stickers: one fat ginger with ribbon and crown, one showing three grey kittens climbing a pile of skulls. All from Still Winter Craft.
May 3, 2025 at 1:43 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
Hell of a time trying to get a decent picture of these windy flags in Brum
Progress flag reading Everyone is welcome here and a trans flag flying high in the sky next to the Birmingham City Council building. The wind has bent them into a kind of flower shape Flags blowing to the right so a bit more is visible. Blowing out much more to the left. Can see a lot more but it's the back of the flag so it's faded. Blowing to the left again. Easier to read the words on the progress flag except they're backwards.
April 26, 2025 at 2:13 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
From my splurge the other day
Stray Kids: maxident, rock star, rock star Changbin postcard version, Hop accordion IN version. Ateez: The World fin and Golden Hour pt1 Woo Young version. Taemin: the fifth mini album. Key: Killer, the 2nd album repackaged. Xdinary Heroes: Deadlock.
March 14, 2025 at 3:42 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
My note books have been captured by a super villain.
Extremely handsome and fluffy tuxedo cat lying on a pile of note books on a bed. His tail is curled like a question mark and his face is triumphant. His little white front paws are together. Crazy eyebrows going on.
February 25, 2025 at 12:58 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
All my recent physical book purchases 📚💙
Iron Widow by Xiran Jay Zhao, Hexarchate Stories by Yoon Ha Lee, Amberlough by Lara Elena Donnelly, The Outside by Ada Hoffman, Self-made Man by Poppy Z Brite, Love in the Big City by Park Sang Young, The Last Unicorn by Peter S Beagle, The Goblin Emperor by Katherine Addison and Song of the Huntress by Lucy Holland.
February 20, 2025 at 3:13 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
Got a lightstick last night.
Photo of me at Ateez in Manchester. I'm wearing a black face mask. I'm bathed in blue light and holding an Ateez light stick. It was taken vertically but it's loaded horizontal and I can't fix it.
January 31, 2025 at 1:24 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
POV: you're bursting for a piss
Shot from my pov showing curly black mini doodle fast asleep on my lap with multicoloured shepsky pressed up against his side also fast asleep. Both cosy and oblivious to my plight.
January 5, 2025 at 1:24 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
5 years ago today I lost a special lad, Mr Samuel Lalington. At least I get to see him every day on my wrist and got to shove all my grief into a novel that I dedicated to him.
Gorgeous Border Collie sit/lying on the floor. His mouth hangs open like he's smiling. Same beautiful dog smiling even more. There's a rope toy at his feet. Simple, clean line tattoo of his face on my wrist. Dedication in Benothinged reading For Christine Matthews and Sammy Lala.
January 2, 2025 at 2:36 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
Finally finished Love in the Big City! Adored it. One of the best shows of 2024 without a doubt.
Title screen of Love in the Big City. It shows a pink, blue and white skyline with stars or fireworks dotted around. Centre is the title in Korean. Two little pink figures sit on the letters.
December 31, 2024 at 6:48 PM
alvartheo.bsky.social
Without downloading any new pictures, what is your energy going into 2025?
Shot from music video Youth by Lee Know. Shows a tiny Lee Know in a coffee cup which reads No One Can Stop Me.
December 28, 2024 at 3:58 PM