Damn. I was hoping to leave Idaho, where they think I'm a porno-holding child groomer, and come back to the central coast of California where I could be free of the reactive dolts. It's dumb even on its face. Maybe it was his publicist... who's now looking for a new job.

Tongan seaweed. It's crisp like a raw carrot and salty like the sea. It was delivered fresh, wrapped in long leaves in a plastic bag.

Attire: smart casual. Hmm, my glasses will have to serve as the smart part of the attire.

They threaten to visit me when I return to the States and make me poor. I tell them that I'll be poor in my wallet but rich in happiness.