Please tell me there’s a white jazz guy named Anglo Sax’in
November 14, 2025 at 2:38 AM
Please tell me there’s a white jazz guy named Anglo Sax’in
Reposted by Zak Toscani
A little joke about a coffee shop order gone wrong
November 13, 2025 at 5:54 PM
A little joke about a coffee shop order gone wrong
I need a life oversight committee bs last night I paired some leftover Chinese food with Synder’s of Hanover pretzels
November 13, 2025 at 9:14 PM
I need a life oversight committee bs last night I paired some leftover Chinese food with Synder’s of Hanover pretzels
A little joke about a coffee shop order gone wrong
November 13, 2025 at 5:54 PM
A little joke about a coffee shop order gone wrong
Random House has rejected my book proposal of an agnostic retelling of Judy Blume’s fantastic novel retitled as “To Whom It May Concern, It’s Me, Margaret”
And by Random House, I mean I just knocked on an absolute strangers door and pitched it
And by Random House, I mean I just knocked on an absolute strangers door and pitched it
November 13, 2025 at 12:01 AM
Random House has rejected my book proposal of an agnostic retelling of Judy Blume’s fantastic novel retitled as “To Whom It May Concern, It’s Me, Margaret”
And by Random House, I mean I just knocked on an absolute strangers door and pitched it
And by Random House, I mean I just knocked on an absolute strangers door and pitched it
It’s gonna be a fucking blast - you won’t wanna miss it
November 11, 2025 at 4:52 PM
It’s gonna be a fucking blast - you won’t wanna miss it
Reposted by Zak Toscani
Frozen pizzas are blank canvases you should use to paint your masterpiece
November 10, 2025 at 7:25 PM
Frozen pizzas are blank canvases you should use to paint your masterpiece
For as dramatic as coconuts are you’d really expect them to taste better
November 7, 2025 at 11:18 PM
For as dramatic as coconuts are you’d really expect them to taste better
In the Olive Garden of good and evil
November 7, 2025 at 5:45 PM
In the Olive Garden of good and evil
So this is how you use AI, eh?
*dumps a bottle of water on a laptop*
*dumps a bottle of water on a laptop*
November 7, 2025 at 4:32 AM
So this is how you use AI, eh?
*dumps a bottle of water on a laptop*
*dumps a bottle of water on a laptop*
favorite dinner experience is a seafood boil, they dump out your food from a plastic bag, you get to eat like a respectable raccoon casually digging through the oceans most delicious trash
November 6, 2025 at 11:11 PM
favorite dinner experience is a seafood boil, they dump out your food from a plastic bag, you get to eat like a respectable raccoon casually digging through the oceans most delicious trash
YouTube is serving me up lots of titles like “boring history facts to help you sleep” and “dull Greek myths for sleeping” that’s just college. I paid $65,000 for that
November 6, 2025 at 4:55 PM
YouTube is serving me up lots of titles like “boring history facts to help you sleep” and “dull Greek myths for sleeping” that’s just college. I paid $65,000 for that
Laws: don’t you look at your phone while driving
Car companies: yeah! Instead look at this bigger screen we put further away from you
Google maps: also answer a series of questions about the road your currently driving on
Car companies: yeah! Instead look at this bigger screen we put further away from you
Google maps: also answer a series of questions about the road your currently driving on
October 29, 2025 at 12:03 AM
Laws: don’t you look at your phone while driving
Car companies: yeah! Instead look at this bigger screen we put further away from you
Google maps: also answer a series of questions about the road your currently driving on
Car companies: yeah! Instead look at this bigger screen we put further away from you
Google maps: also answer a series of questions about the road your currently driving on
Portland! Doing a holiday leftovers show at Framework on 12/27 - sketches, standup, and it’s BYOB! Get them tickets
October 25, 2025 at 11:39 PM
Portland! Doing a holiday leftovers show at Framework on 12/27 - sketches, standup, and it’s BYOB! Get them tickets
ordered Fogo de Chao on postmates and now there’s 25 Brazilian people outside my door holding skewers of meat
October 22, 2025 at 5:52 PM
ordered Fogo de Chao on postmates and now there’s 25 Brazilian people outside my door holding skewers of meat
“oysters biting today?” - me to a group of men fishing in Charleston
October 22, 2025 at 3:18 PM
“oysters biting today?” - me to a group of men fishing in Charleston
Did they ever think to have a Batman villain named Badman? Could be a good foil just on account of all the confusion
October 21, 2025 at 11:09 PM
Did they ever think to have a Batman villain named Badman? Could be a good foil just on account of all the confusion
Toscani Family Reunion hats are available online for the next 24hrs! DM me. Both color ways are adjustable.
Signature by my mom, designed by a professional forger, and embroidered and brought to life by @trillblazin.bsky.social
All hats will be shipped out this week. Welcome to the family.
Signature by my mom, designed by a professional forger, and embroidered and brought to life by @trillblazin.bsky.social
All hats will be shipped out this week. Welcome to the family.
October 6, 2025 at 7:53 PM
Toscani Family Reunion hats are available online for the next 24hrs! DM me. Both color ways are adjustable.
Signature by my mom, designed by a professional forger, and embroidered and brought to life by @trillblazin.bsky.social
All hats will be shipped out this week. Welcome to the family.
Signature by my mom, designed by a professional forger, and embroidered and brought to life by @trillblazin.bsky.social
All hats will be shipped out this week. Welcome to the family.
You know times are tough when you’re boiling your kids pasta art
September 24, 2025 at 2:02 AM
You know times are tough when you’re boiling your kids pasta art
I love technology. I love that I have to download an app to use my lightbulbs. I love having to log in every time I open the app. I love that the app had a data breach and my information was leaked. I love that a hacker has access to my mood lighting
August 26, 2025 at 6:15 AM
I love technology. I love that I have to download an app to use my lightbulbs. I love having to log in every time I open the app. I love that the app had a data breach and my information was leaked. I love that a hacker has access to my mood lighting
90 day fiancé but it’s just adult men trying to lock in a new best friend
August 18, 2025 at 2:10 PM
90 day fiancé but it’s just adult men trying to lock in a new best friend
Started mixing frozen grapes with hot tamales and I can tell I’m flying too close to the sun
August 18, 2025 at 1:24 AM
Started mixing frozen grapes with hot tamales and I can tell I’m flying too close to the sun