Will Donnelly
@willdonnelly.bsky.social
Writer/Founder of the Avid Writers' Collective/No Fun at All.
Iowa MFA, Houston PhD. Words in Barrelhouse, Zone 3, Hobart, Sequestrum, etc. he/him
Athens, Georgia, USA
Iowa MFA, Houston PhD. Words in Barrelhouse, Zone 3, Hobart, Sequestrum, etc. he/him
Athens, Georgia, USA
Pinned
It's time to write some bannable books.
I just got a an email from my veterinarian offering promotional deals for my cat for Veteran's Day, and it makes me think they don't know that my cat never served in the military.
November 11, 2025 at 6:12 PM
I just got a an email from my veterinarian offering promotional deals for my cat for Veteran's Day, and it makes me think they don't know that my cat never served in the military.
There are too many apps.
November 11, 2025 at 4:11 PM
There are too many apps.
Funny because it’s true.
November 4, 2025 at 3:26 PM
Funny because it’s true.
I think I’ve saved enough daylight to last a lifetime at this point.
November 3, 2025 at 12:32 AM
I think I’ve saved enough daylight to last a lifetime at this point.
[me walking into a tattoo shop]
“Hi, can someone please turn me into a Post Malone?”
“Hi, can someone please turn me into a Post Malone?”
October 31, 2025 at 12:36 AM
[me walking into a tattoo shop]
“Hi, can someone please turn me into a Post Malone?”
“Hi, can someone please turn me into a Post Malone?”
When you saw only one pair of footsteps in the sand, it was then that I carried Yoda in a weird-looking backpack.
October 28, 2025 at 11:57 PM
When you saw only one pair of footsteps in the sand, it was then that I carried Yoda in a weird-looking backpack.
What exactly is a “perfect MRI”??
October 27, 2025 at 5:37 PM
What exactly is a “perfect MRI”??
“First, I’d like to thank my cat, Mouse, who’s been so, so helpful throughout the entire suitcase unpacking process…”
October 24, 2025 at 11:03 PM
“First, I’d like to thank my cat, Mouse, who’s been so, so helpful throughout the entire suitcase unpacking process…”
I've started signing off on all emails as follows:
LOL,
Will
And it's not always achieving the best results.
LOL,
Will
And it's not always achieving the best results.
October 24, 2025 at 4:32 PM
I've started signing off on all emails as follows:
LOL,
Will
And it's not always achieving the best results.
LOL,
Will
And it's not always achieving the best results.
Over the intercom, our pilot is referring to turbulence as “sky bumps.”
Should I be concerned?
Should I be concerned?
October 23, 2025 at 9:10 PM
Over the intercom, our pilot is referring to turbulence as “sky bumps.”
Should I be concerned?
Should I be concerned?
“Their marriage had ceased to be conjugal; his body did not conjugate hers; there was no grammar between them.”
~Namwali Serpell, ‘The Old Drift’
#SundaySentence
~Namwali Serpell, ‘The Old Drift’
#SundaySentence
October 12, 2025 at 3:47 PM
“Their marriage had ceased to be conjugal; his body did not conjugate hers; there was no grammar between them.”
~Namwali Serpell, ‘The Old Drift’
#SundaySentence
~Namwali Serpell, ‘The Old Drift’
#SundaySentence
I’ll be sleepmaxxing this weekend.
October 10, 2025 at 11:37 PM
I’ll be sleepmaxxing this weekend.
My cat has now learned how to open doors.
When they’re closed.
My life is about to get so much more complicated.
When they’re closed.
My life is about to get so much more complicated.
October 9, 2025 at 1:00 AM
My cat has now learned how to open doors.
When they’re closed.
My life is about to get so much more complicated.
When they’re closed.
My life is about to get so much more complicated.
They should award a Nobel Prize in Medicine to whomever invented ginger ale.
October 8, 2025 at 3:07 PM
They should award a Nobel Prize in Medicine to whomever invented ginger ale.
“The three o’clock bell is big over the harbor, flakes of bronze dropping slow to the water, bell in her mouth, bell in her scabbard.”
~Leni Zumas, ‘Red Clocks’
#sundaysentence
~Leni Zumas, ‘Red Clocks’
#sundaysentence
October 5, 2025 at 5:09 PM
“The three o’clock bell is big over the harbor, flakes of bronze dropping slow to the water, bell in her mouth, bell in her scabbard.”
~Leni Zumas, ‘Red Clocks’
#sundaysentence
~Leni Zumas, ‘Red Clocks’
#sundaysentence
There’s a ghost that haunts my heart, and it won’t shut up about Dubai chocolate and matcha smoothies.
October 2, 2025 at 11:20 PM
There’s a ghost that haunts my heart, and it won’t shut up about Dubai chocolate and matcha smoothies.
Groundbreaking.
We are thrilled to announce that our NEW Large Language Model will be released on 11.18.25.
October 1, 2025 at 5:22 PM
Groundbreaking.
My fitted sheets always come out the dryer holding onto damp surprises.
September 27, 2025 at 6:14 PM
My fitted sheets always come out the dryer holding onto damp surprises.
I'm loving Fat Bear Week, but when does Thicc Elk Week start?
September 26, 2025 at 3:58 PM
I'm loving Fat Bear Week, but when does Thicc Elk Week start?
Is anyone available to pimp my ride?
September 25, 2025 at 12:53 AM
Is anyone available to pimp my ride?
Well, I thought I was getting raptured earlier, but it turns out I was just hearing an electric BMW backing up behind me.
September 24, 2025 at 12:12 AM
Well, I thought I was getting raptured earlier, but it turns out I was just hearing an electric BMW backing up behind me.
Why does the Rapture have to be today??
I’ve got so many meetings. I don’t think I’m going to be able to make it, y’all.
I’ve got so many meetings. I don’t think I’m going to be able to make it, y’all.
September 23, 2025 at 11:43 AM
Why does the Rapture have to be today??
I’ve got so many meetings. I don’t think I’m going to be able to make it, y’all.
I’ve got so many meetings. I don’t think I’m going to be able to make it, y’all.
Beware the deepfake AI video of me ordering a cute frog-themed cake at a Kroger bakery that's been going around online.
When in doubt, remember: I never shop at Kroger.
When in doubt, remember: I never shop at Kroger.
September 22, 2025 at 5:56 PM
Beware the deepfake AI video of me ordering a cute frog-themed cake at a Kroger bakery that's been going around online.
When in doubt, remember: I never shop at Kroger.
When in doubt, remember: I never shop at Kroger.
I so appreciate Aaron Parnas’s news coverage on social media, but dude’s like a one-man 24 hour cable news network. I learn just about everything from him before I get it from anyone else.
I don’t know how he does it, but it’s impressive.
I don’t know how he does it, but it’s impressive.
September 21, 2025 at 4:14 PM
I so appreciate Aaron Parnas’s news coverage on social media, but dude’s like a one-man 24 hour cable news network. I learn just about everything from him before I get it from anyone else.
I don’t know how he does it, but it’s impressive.
I don’t know how he does it, but it’s impressive.
Me at the coffee shop this morning, accidentally sounding like Eminem while placing my order:
“And can I get a little cinnamon in it? And what’s the limit?”
“And can I get a little cinnamon in it? And what’s the limit?”
September 20, 2025 at 2:13 PM
Me at the coffee shop this morning, accidentally sounding like Eminem while placing my order:
“And can I get a little cinnamon in it? And what’s the limit?”
“And can I get a little cinnamon in it? And what’s the limit?”