I have committed ant genocide. Turned out my awesome stump was an anthill. I'm normally a live and let live person, but dogs kept bringing in the ants! It's a cruel world.

We don't know what we think about something until we write it.

If Elon were the Randian/Heinleinian hero he imagines himself to be, he would shoot himself to Mars.

Something that does not affect you in any way but for some mysterious reason annoys the crap outta you. Me first: gender reveal parties

Home is where the wi-fi is.

Apple watch sure seems useful, but it's so fugly! Sticking with my android MK runway design.

sometimes i watch videos about youtuber drama and i have no idea who any of them are and there are always like 300 people involved. it's fun hearing about a bunch of people who are mad at each other that has nothing to do with me and that i don't have to care about after it's over

TFW you want some Earl Grey but know you will rue the caffeine after 6pm. #beingold

Well, Natalie. As my grandma said "if they cheat with you, they'll cheat on you". 🤷🏻‍♀️
#natalieportman #celebritygossip #millepied

Are you terrified every time you prepare to use your mandolin or are you normal?
#cookinghazards #biteytools

My child-free peeps: do you find yourself looking around at the state of all the things and feel like you totally made the right call?

She's everywhere.

My guilty pleasure is #Temptation Island. Other than that, I don't watch reality tv. That might change if these shows were real.