we used to build household shrines to Going On The Computer and it's no coincidence that as we abandoned these we started straying further from god's light

So is no-one presenting Masterchef now?

Ah nothing like a romantic meal in the grounds of St. Thomas hospital near the covid memorial wall.

Channel 5 is rebranding to 5 tomorrow.

So it’s been Channel 5 > Five > Channel 5 > Five.

The time to act is close at hand, so I guess it's time to unleash the titans, my monstrous band?

Stick Man can't you see
You're just not the stick for me
I know it'll give me strife
But I'm in love with Stick Man's wife

You can show an octopus being eaten in Oldboy because an octopus can't feel pain. But you can hurt an octopus's feelings by showing it the Oldboy remake.

I wish Traitors had that Crystal Maze whimsy where Richard O’Brien would pretend he and his mum lived in the zones. I want Claudia to pretend it’s her castle and tell us why she has so many haunted dolls.

The Traitors is the only place you see adults drinking squash. Wild.

I guess I just assumed cousin marriage was already illegal??