Talia Argondezzi
taliaargondezzi.bsky.social
Talia Argondezzi
@taliaargondezzi.bsky.social
Writing professor and satire writer with humor in McSweeney’s, New Yorker, Slackjaw, Belladonna, Points in Case.

My book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1250287081?tag=macmillan-20

My website: taliaargondezzi.com
My new McSweeney's!
"You’ve been given an app for reluctantly volunteering to run the book fair, an app for viewing your kid’s hastily prepared report cards, and an app for lodging complaints about our apps. Now, we’ll also be tracking your child’s whereabouts on three additional apps."
Our School District Can Now Keep Track of Your Child with Just Three Terrible Apps
Other than lawsuits, losing track of a child is every school district’s worst nightmare. We haven’t lost anyone yet, but an EdTech company has pain...
buff.ly
November 10, 2025 at 4:18 PM
Also, here is my other new humor from a couple days ago: thebelladonnacomedy.com/why-i-only-a...
Why I Only Allow My Teen to Talk to Instagram’s PG-13 Chatbots
Human teens can be so R-rated sometimes.
thebelladonnacomedy.com
October 22, 2025 at 3:34 PM
Teachers! If your students are using AI to write their papers, maybe it's because you personally are not using AI enough. Here's my new @mcsweeneys.net www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/i-n...
I Need AI to Write Better Lesson Plans So My Students Stop Using AI to Write Their Papers
I care deeply about my students’ learning, but with all the new technologies available to help them cut corners, I worry that they’re not doing the...
www.mcsweeneys.net
October 2, 2025 at 1:50 AM
Fall has the best PR. When there's a cool summer day, everyone says "wow, fall weather!" Like nope, many summer days are just really really lovely
August 22, 2025 at 4:04 PM
SUBSCRIBE TO THE NEWSLETTER OF HUMOROUS WRITING! Not just because they mentioned my piece this week, just because it’s that good
July 25, 2025 at 8:01 PM
Here’s my new article in Slackjaw, for both plant purchasers and people with the same personality as me medium.com/slackjaw/hou...
Houseplant Care Instructions, Which You Should Not Take Personally
Your houseplant needs regular waterings. Your houseplant trusts you understand what “regular” means in this context.
medium.com
July 20, 2025 at 6:22 PM
I wrote this! Hope you enjoy. Also, here's the friends and family link (no need to sign in to Medium) medium.com/thebelladonn...
July 17, 2025 at 10:42 PM
Reposted by Talia Argondezzi
“What makes women tick, from the minds of not-women writers.” By @taliaargondezzi.bsky.social

Full piece: thebelladonnacomedy.com/woman-empowe...
July 17, 2025 at 3:05 PM
Jane Austen didn’t wreck your life. Lack of George Eliot wrecked your life
July 15, 2025 at 4:24 PM
WHAT. As a child I only had mega-boiled brussels sprouts and now I always roast them. I thought I was a culinary genius. I was wrong.
Wait you’re telling me that Brussels Sprouts LITERALLY tasted awful when I was a kid and I didn’t just magically start liking them as an adult?????
July 8, 2025 at 2:54 AM
I co-wrote a Review of New Foods for McSweeney’s with @jeffbender.bsky.social. It has a light 4th of July theme. Among several other light themes. www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/utz...
Reviews of New Food: Utz Lemonade Potato Chips
Remember the summertime barbecues of childhood? Sunshine, sprinklers, the slurred speech of day-drunk parents? When, as kids, we’d eat potato chips...
www.mcsweeneys.net
July 2, 2025 at 3:44 AM
today I purchased 10 rolls at the deli and my cashier said "you having a big party? Or just stocking up?" IS TEN A SILLY LOT OF ROLLS TO BUY???
June 19, 2025 at 3:28 AM
Kids say the darndest things in literary fiction
June 17, 2025 at 10:44 PM
I wrote an important reminder for McSweeney’s: at least aren’t stuck with a woman president www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/its...
It’s Not Going Great, but Imagine How Much Worse Things Would Be with a Woman President
A lot has gone wrong under Donald Trump, but at least we narrowly avoided the catastrophe of a female president. Don’t get me wrong, I liked Kamala...
www.mcsweeneys.net
June 9, 2025 at 6:47 PM
Got a new piece in Slackjaw, co-written with @jeffbender.bsky.social
medium.com/slackjaw/kar...
Karl Marx Or Richard Marx?
Iconic beard / iconic mullet. By Jeff Bender and Talia Argondezzi
medium.com
June 1, 2025 at 1:01 PM
Reposted by Talia Argondezzi
"People these days don’t have enough get-up-and-go. One little setback and they’re dependent on Medicaid forever. Instead, when life hands you lemons, demand that it also hand you a $400 million jet in exchange for unnamed future political favors."
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/you...
You Don’t Need Medicaid—Just Pull Yourself Up by Your Abuse of Power
“Republicans advance bill with steep cuts to Medicaid as part of Trump agenda.” —The Hill - - -Quit complaining about Republicans’ proposed cuts to...
www.mcsweeneys.net
May 16, 2025 at 1:20 AM
"Imagine RFK Jr.'s brain is a sloppy bachelorette party." Here's my new comedy on @belladonnacomedy.bsky.social medium.com/thebelladonn...
I’m RFK Jr.’s One Correct Opinion
Please help! Being stuck in his brain with the other opinions is a nightmare.
medium.com
May 13, 2025 at 2:09 PM
I wish I could go back to my younger self and gently tell her “don’t worry, that acne will go away on its own eventually. and immediately be replaced by rosacea”
May 10, 2025 at 1:54 PM
Feel free to use my handy new McSweeney's for your thank-you note to Trump www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/tem...
Templates for Thanking President Trump
Template 1 Dear President Trump and [RELEVANT MINIONS] I’m just writing from [UKRAINE / GAZA / THE HEARD AND MCDONALD ISLANDS] to say, once and for...
www.mcsweeneys.net
May 5, 2025 at 12:04 AM
my new article in the Belladonna about kids these days thebelladonnacomedy.com/our-kids-min...
Our Kids’ Minds Are Rotting Because of This New Technology (Fire)
This invention is destroying humanity! (My generation’s technologies were fine, though.)
thebelladonnacomedy.com
April 23, 2025 at 5:31 PM