Sweet Lumps
@sweetlumps.bsky.social
I bring a certain "je ne sais pourquoi"
Pinned
If you see this, post a picture from whatever device you're using without explanation.
November 28, 2025 at 5:33 PM
If you see this, post a picture from whatever device you're using without explanation.
This is the face of a regionally specific demon of European folklore who comes to your home and takes your firstborn if you don't have any suet or lard to feed him
Ÿ̴̻̣̫̭̦̻̣͙̂̽̎͘r̴͍̭̒̆͆̈́̓ ̷̫͙̞͈̋̇̀͋͂ͅȏ̴̧̳̪̯͈̜͉̠̔̈̓̅̀͘͠p̸͔̜͇̬̹͔̮̝̬̔͊̏͐̋͐̏̓e̷̡̳͈̦̤̣̦̍́̒̏̂̂͘n̵̫̖͖̭̥͋̏̄̋͜͜͝ ̵̯̥̤̋̓̑m̶̻̽̓̀̌̔͗͊̍͑̏o̷̡̳͓͉̼̳̘̍͛̿̃͌͝u̵̗̭̱͓̳͐͐̆t̶̝̔̅̔̔̚͠h̶̡̛̃ ̴̖͎̣̱͓̖͎̄͝a̷̹̼̺̖͂͗̚ͅw̶͈̞̹̬͗ȁ̷̳͇̞̱̪̙̬̬į̶̧̛͕̬̄͊̌̔̀͊̇̆̚͜ţ̸͕̗̅̀̿͐̑̒̐̓i̴̜̪̘̠̣̥̊̈̌͌̏͒̏̀͊̋ͅn̶̼̖̙̖͂̇͒́́́̕͝ǵ̵̳͖̫̯̠̯̺͇̽̊̎͂͝ ̶͎̝̮̘̄m̸̳͍͈̥̝͖̊͐̓̒̇͋̾̋͜ẏ̵̦̬̼͕̱͙̒͘ͅ ̸̛͙̜̫̬̻͈̦͇͛̑̃̓̒͊͝h̵͔͓̏̈́͋͆̅̽̏̇͝ä̷̧̧̱̠̪͉͍̜́̇͊ͅr̴̨̛͇͕̪̈́̎̿̈͑̔̚͝v̶̧͍̖͇̫̠͕͙̙͚̑e̸͕͎̽̑̄͛̉̃̈s̸̤͛̀ţ̵̦̱͒̃͗
̵̡̙͕̝̐̂̀̎͐̏̇ͅD̴̛̞̥̘̼̣͈̮̟̃̾͂ͅr̴̝̪̹̫͔̱̗̬̥͓̊ì̸̡̡͚̭͎̽̈́͑͆̈́̆ͅṅ̶̛̻̟̝̥͊̏̈́̀̈́̎̚k̵̰͕̼̈́́͜ ̶̨̪͕̦̦͇͈̰̞̈́̒̈͒͐̉̏͜f̶̧̞̒̽̋͑̽r̴̨͓̥̠̫̠͙̩̣͐̀̒͋͛̓̓̕͝o̶̲̒̌̽͒m̷̨̰̙̳͓͖̬͉̽͆̎̽͋ͅͅ ̸̮̭̄̂͆̉̋̋̔̊̇m̴͉͛̉́è̴͕̖̥̰̺͚͓̗ ̶̢̫͑͑͒̔L̸̡͂̈́ő̷̝̜͂͆̈́̌̕v̸͍͓͍͖̙̺̝̈̆ë̵̜̠́͋̑͂̈́̐̂̂̐
̵̡̙͕̝̐̂̀̎͐̏̇ͅD̴̛̞̥̘̼̣͈̮̟̃̾͂ͅr̴̝̪̹̫͔̱̗̬̥͓̊ì̸̡̡͚̭͎̽̈́͑͆̈́̆ͅṅ̶̛̻̟̝̥͊̏̈́̀̈́̎̚k̵̰͕̼̈́́͜ ̶̨̪͕̦̦͇͈̰̞̈́̒̈͒͐̉̏͜f̶̧̞̒̽̋͑̽r̴̨͓̥̠̫̠͙̩̣͐̀̒͋͛̓̓̕͝o̶̲̒̌̽͒m̷̨̰̙̳͓͖̬͉̽͆̎̽͋ͅͅ ̸̮̭̄̂͆̉̋̋̔̊̇m̴͉͛̉́è̴͕̖̥̰̺͚͓̗ ̶̢̫͑͑͒̔L̸̡͂̈́ő̷̝̜͂͆̈́̌̕v̸͍͓͍͖̙̺̝̈̆ë̵̜̠́͋̑͂̈́̐̂̂̐
November 23, 2025 at 1:38 AM
This is the face of a regionally specific demon of European folklore who comes to your home and takes your firstborn if you don't have any suet or lard to feed him
brb gonna embroider EAT MY FAT HAIRY TURDS, SEAN DUFFY on a snuggie
November 23, 2025 at 1:23 AM
brb gonna embroider EAT MY FAT HAIRY TURDS, SEAN DUFFY on a snuggie
i bet his flopsweat looks like movie theater butter
November 14, 2025 at 5:39 PM
i bet his flopsweat looks like movie theater butter
quick, build more data centers so the robots can find out why it's happening
September 26, 2025 at 4:39 PM
quick, build more data centers so the robots can find out why it's happening
Some people call me the space cowboy, some call me
September 17, 2025 at 1:31 PM
Some people call me the space cowboy, some call me
[clerk at the comptroller’s office]
What’s the business address, sir?
[me, sweating profusely, registering a fake business]
uhhhhhh
What’s the business address, sir?
[me, sweating profusely, registering a fake business]
uhhhhhh
September 14, 2025 at 8:09 PM
[clerk at the comptroller’s office]
What’s the business address, sir?
[me, sweating profusely, registering a fake business]
uhhhhhh
What’s the business address, sir?
[me, sweating profusely, registering a fake business]
uhhhhhh
I upgraded to a new phone recently, and the thumbnails for my iTunes playlists seem a bit... off
September 12, 2025 at 12:13 PM
I upgraded to a new phone recently, and the thumbnails for my iTunes playlists seem a bit... off
[whispers] Crunchatize me Cap'n
September 9, 2025 at 12:03 PM
[whispers] Crunchatize me Cap'n
When I was younger I thought Seth Green and Jamie Kennedy were the same person and then I saw Enemy of the State and lost my fucking mind
August 4, 2025 at 4:32 PM
When I was younger I thought Seth Green and Jamie Kennedy were the same person and then I saw Enemy of the State and lost my fucking mind
Reposted by Sweet Lumps
knew this would come in handy someday 😏
September 9, 2024 at 11:20 PM
knew this would come in handy someday 😏
Reposted by Sweet Lumps
transition music in a metroid sitcom
July 24, 2025 at 9:39 PM
transition music in a metroid sitcom
I went down an internet rabbit hole last night, and while reading the Wikipedia entry for Pauly Shore's "Biodome" (don't ask) I stumbled across this nugget
July 26, 2025 at 10:15 AM
I went down an internet rabbit hole last night, and while reading the Wikipedia entry for Pauly Shore's "Biodome" (don't ask) I stumbled across this nugget
Just walked into my local Michaels in July and I dunno you guys, I’m beginning to think maybe private equity is not so good at running businesses
July 22, 2025 at 9:42 PM
Just walked into my local Michaels in July and I dunno you guys, I’m beginning to think maybe private equity is not so good at running businesses
Sir. Sir, please. 😢 “Hunter” has too many associations with crooked Joe Biden. Please, sir. 🥺 Use a stronger word. “Predator.”
Full fash. Also I tried to respond with “where are the Epstein files, bitch?” But instagram asked me to edit it because it violated their community standards. Sad.
July 22, 2025 at 12:57 PM
Sir. Sir, please. 😢 “Hunter” has too many associations with crooked Joe Biden. Please, sir. 🥺 Use a stronger word. “Predator.”
Cats have an unshakeable, inborn understanding of squatters' rights
July 22, 2025 at 3:31 AM
Cats have an unshakeable, inborn understanding of squatters' rights
Reposted by Sweet Lumps
A favorite Wodehouse trick, which I feel is under remarked, is playing with what you’re allowed to do in a text. Funny example from an early novel.
July 13, 2025 at 1:38 PM
A favorite Wodehouse trick, which I feel is under remarked, is playing with what you’re allowed to do in a text. Funny example from an early novel.
CITY TO CUOMO: DROP DEAD
June 25, 2025 at 2:38 AM
CITY TO CUOMO: DROP DEAD
Me receiving the news that @josephsmemecoat.bsky.social has gone another day without posting
June 20, 2025 at 12:41 PM
Me receiving the news that @josephsmemecoat.bsky.social has gone another day without posting
hey do u guys remember when that plantation burned down
June 20, 2025 at 2:54 AM
hey do u guys remember when that plantation burned down
THIS VEHICLE DOES NOT
June 20, 2025 at 12:10 AM
THIS VEHICLE DOES NOT
well this is not... a minor loss
Drake posted his gambling losses.
He has a problem.
He has a problem.
June 19, 2025 at 10:44 PM
well this is not... a minor loss
Reposted by Sweet Lumps
Don’t send me an unsolicited picture of your peewee cocktapus unless you want me to…
A: find your mom’s Facebook
B: find a picture she uploaded of you reminiscing about what a nice young man you were
C: badly photoshop that into a locket
D: convince you I’m your daughter.
Happy Father’s Day Daddy.
A: find your mom’s Facebook
B: find a picture she uploaded of you reminiscing about what a nice young man you were
C: badly photoshop that into a locket
D: convince you I’m your daughter.
Happy Father’s Day Daddy.
June 15, 2025 at 9:24 PM
Don’t send me an unsolicited picture of your peewee cocktapus unless you want me to…
A: find your mom’s Facebook
B: find a picture she uploaded of you reminiscing about what a nice young man you were
C: badly photoshop that into a locket
D: convince you I’m your daughter.
Happy Father’s Day Daddy.
A: find your mom’s Facebook
B: find a picture she uploaded of you reminiscing about what a nice young man you were
C: badly photoshop that into a locket
D: convince you I’m your daughter.
Happy Father’s Day Daddy.
I've added a house rule for Slugbug/Punchbuggy: If you cause someone else to see a Cybertruck by drawing their attention to it, they get to punch you.
May 30, 2025 at 9:52 PM
I've added a house rule for Slugbug/Punchbuggy: If you cause someone else to see a Cybertruck by drawing their attention to it, they get to punch you.
When reached for comment, the man Donald Trump shot in the middle of 5th Avenue said while he doesn't condone the president's actions, he does not regret his vote.
May 21, 2025 at 4:27 PM
When reached for comment, the man Donald Trump shot in the middle of 5th Avenue said while he doesn't condone the president's actions, he does not regret his vote.