swearclock ⌚︎
@swearclock.bsky.social
Throw away your watches - they are obsolete. A bot by Rob Manuel. Add your suggestions here: bit.ly/swearclockform
Tickle My Anus With The Radio Times It's 9:00PM
February 11, 2026 at 9:00 PM
Tickle My Anus With The Radio Times It's 9:00PM
Drink My Diarrhea Juice It's 8:00PM
February 11, 2026 at 8:00 PM
Drink My Diarrhea Juice It's 8:00PM
You Utter Cock Cheese It's 7:00PM
February 11, 2026 at 7:00 PM
You Utter Cock Cheese It's 7:00PM
Tongue-Punch My Fartbox It's 6:00PM
February 11, 2026 at 6:00 PM
Tongue-Punch My Fartbox It's 6:00PM
Smell My Gruffnuts It's 5:00PM
February 11, 2026 at 5:00 PM
Smell My Gruffnuts It's 5:00PM
Play The Pink Oboe It's 4:00PM
February 11, 2026 at 4:00 PM
Play The Pink Oboe It's 4:00PM
Wow! That Horse's Cock Is Fucking Massive It's 3:00PM
February 11, 2026 at 3:00 PM
Wow! That Horse's Cock Is Fucking Massive It's 3:00PM
Anyone Called Neil Needs A Fucking Harddrive Check It's 2:00PM
February 11, 2026 at 2:00 PM
Anyone Called Neil Needs A Fucking Harddrive Check It's 2:00PM
Bukkake Boutros Boutros-Ghali It's 1:00PM
February 11, 2026 at 1:00 PM
Bukkake Boutros Boutros-Ghali It's 1:00PM
You're Fucking Wrong, You're Fucking Wrong A Lot, And It Fucking Annoys Me It's 12:00PM
February 11, 2026 at 12:00 PM
You're Fucking Wrong, You're Fucking Wrong A Lot, And It Fucking Annoys Me It's 12:00PM
A Reboot Of Groundforce Except Instead Of Garden Renovation They Tidy Up Your Ma's Front Bottom It's 11:00AM
February 11, 2026 at 11:00 AM
A Reboot Of Groundforce Except Instead Of Garden Renovation They Tidy Up Your Ma's Front Bottom It's 11:00AM
I Can't Believe This Is Not Fanny Batter It's 10:00AM
February 11, 2026 at 10:00 AM
I Can't Believe This Is Not Fanny Batter It's 10:00AM
Your Dad Sucks Off Truckers For Nectar Points It's 9:00AM
February 11, 2026 at 9:00 AM
Your Dad Sucks Off Truckers For Nectar Points It's 9:00AM
Die In A Flaming Car Wreck And Only Be Identified By The Tattoo Around Your Butthole It's 8:00AM
February 11, 2026 at 8:00 AM
Die In A Flaming Car Wreck And Only Be Identified By The Tattoo Around Your Butthole It's 8:00AM
Use Another Man's Jizz As Lube It's 7:00AM
February 11, 2026 at 7:00 AM
Use Another Man's Jizz As Lube It's 7:00AM
Accidentally Fall Naked Onto A Lego Eiffel Tower It's 6:00AM
February 11, 2026 at 6:00 AM
Accidentally Fall Naked Onto A Lego Eiffel Tower It's 6:00AM
I Don't Mean To Get Political Or Anything But Have We Considered Just Firing That Useless Cunt Boris Into The Fucking Sun It's 5:00AM
February 11, 2026 at 5:00 AM
I Don't Mean To Get Political Or Anything But Have We Considered Just Firing That Useless Cunt Boris Into The Fucking Sun It's 5:00AM
Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Bastard! It's 4:00AM
February 11, 2026 at 4:00 AM
Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Bastard! It's 4:00AM
Piss Buckets!! It's 3:00AM
February 11, 2026 at 3:00 AM
Piss Buckets!! It's 3:00AM
Scissor Me Timbers! It's 2:00AM
February 11, 2026 at 2:00 AM
Scissor Me Timbers! It's 2:00AM
Fill My Colon With Conkers It's 1:00AM
February 11, 2026 at 1:00 AM
Fill My Colon With Conkers It's 1:00AM
Dangle Your Dong In Some Marmalade And Get Paddington To Lick It Off It's 12:00AM
February 11, 2026 at 12:00 AM
Dangle Your Dong In Some Marmalade And Get Paddington To Lick It Off It's 12:00AM
Pull That Buttplug Out Of Grandpa's Pooper It's 11:00PM
February 10, 2026 at 11:00 PM
Pull That Buttplug Out Of Grandpa's Pooper It's 11:00PM
Walking Around Tesco's Calling Everyone Fat Cunt Under Your Breath It's 10:00PM
February 10, 2026 at 10:00 PM
Walking Around Tesco's Calling Everyone Fat Cunt Under Your Breath It's 10:00PM
Order The Whole Salmon Then Fuck It At The Table. It's 9:00PM
February 10, 2026 at 9:00 PM
Order The Whole Salmon Then Fuck It At The Table. It's 9:00PM