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spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
Spamusement!
@spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
1 followers 0 following 43 posts
Poorly-drawn cartoons inspired by actual spam subject lines!
By Steven Frank unless otherwise indicated.
https://web.archive.org/web/20200415101153/http://www.spamusement.com/
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spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
Your Managers Don't Have Expertise They Have This.

January 25, 2005
Spamusement #179: Your Managers Don't Have Expertise They Have This. Two hands holding a Magic 8-Ball that displays the message A WACKY TIE DAY WOULD BOOST MORALE.
January 6, 2026 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
Who cares if it hurts

December 14, 2004
Spamusement #160: Who cares if it hurts A smiling man with a black eye gives a thumbs up while holding a sub sandwich. Behind him, a sign reads "FREE SUB SANDWICH WITH EVERY PUNCH IN THE FACE" while a muscular figure punches another person in the face.
January 5, 2026 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
Discover how I automated my recruiting

October 10, 2005
Spamusement #294: Discover how I automated my recruiting Smiling children run eagerly toward a sunny storefront labeled Free Candy. The other side of the building reveals the business is actually a factory named Free Candy Athletic Shoes, Inc., complete with industrial smokestacks and a delivery truck.
January 4, 2026 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
this is what the big dogs do

February 4, 2005
Spamusement #187: this is what the big dogs do A giant dog lifts its hind leg as if to urinate on a small fire truck.
January 3, 2026 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
Enjoy your love life as much as he does

February 1, 2005
Spamusement #184: Enjoy your love life as much as he does A shocked couple in bed looks toward the doorway where a smiling man with a mustache stands wearing a suit and a nametag that says TROY while giving two thumbs up.
January 2, 2026 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
Home is where the heart is

September 29, 2004
Spamusement #86: Home is where the heart is A person stands in an open doorway looking into a room where a massive, pulsating anatomical heart sits on the floor. A framed picture of a happy couple hangs on the wall nearby.
January 1, 2026 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
there is a way out

August 10, 2004
Spamusement #36: there is a way out Two people run toward a jagged crack in a cave wall to escape two large pterodactyls, one of which has a pair of human legs sticking out of its mouth.
December 31, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
Extreme Streching Ramming Pounding Penetration

November 19, 2004
Spamusement #139: Extreme Streching Ramming Pounding Penetration A bald person sticks a finger in their ear.
December 30, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
Say-goodbye-to-the-cellulite--

July 8, 2005
Spamusement #259: Say-goodbye-to-the-cellulite-- A woman waves a handkerchief from the platform as a giant, sweating, lumpy mass watches through the window and pulls away.
December 29, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
not appreciated for what you know

July 21, 2006
Spamusement #323: not appreciated for what you know A man excitedly shouts a barrage of Monty Python quotes, including "We are the knights who say ni!" and "This is an EX parrot!" An angry mob beats him severely until he lies motionless on the ground. Paramedics load him into an ambulance, but as it drives away, the man yells from inside, "It's only a flesh wound!" The ambulance immediately dumps the patient off a cliff.
December 28, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
sexy baby and bad erection?

August 16, 2006
Spamusement #325: sexy baby and bad erection? A baby wearing heavy makeup and lipstick lies in a crib in front of the Leaning Tower of Pisa, which is overlaid with a large stamp reading "REJECTED" and "Spamusement Quality Control."
December 27, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
beaver news

June 30, 2006
Spamusement #319: beaver news A beaver wearing a suit and tie sits at a news anchor desk. A graphic screen behind the beaver displays a wooden log.
December 26, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
Bad Bunny. Bad, Bad, Bad Bunny

December 30, 2005
Spamusement #310: Bad Bunny. Bad, Bad, Bad Bunny Carrot-shaped aliens lie on the ground with large bites taken out of their bodies next to a landed UFO. One dying alien holds a sign reading "WE COME IN PEACE." A person glares angrily at a nearby rabbit.
December 25, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
Get EVERY episode of transformers on DVD at giveaway price

October 3, 2005
Spamusement #292: Get EVERY episode of transformers on DVD at giveaway price The "Soup Nazi" character from Seinfeld telling two Transformers "No soup for you!"
December 24, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
Don't miss Neil Diamond

July 27, 2005
Spamusement #266: Don't miss Neil Diamond A grand piano falling through the sky after being dropped by a bomber.
December 23, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
Guess Who Is Coming to Town

December 24, 2005
Spamusement #307: Guess Who Is Coming to Town A zombified Santa Claus with blank eyes and tattered clothes pulls himself out of the ground in front of a tombstone inscribed CLAUS.
December 22, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
Have you ever dreamt to have a very hard penis during all process?

July 17, 2006
Spamusement #321: Have you ever dreamt to have a very hard penis during all process? A man sweats profusely and wears a strained, uncomfortable expression while posing for a photo at the DMV.
December 21, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
They hold a whole lot of it

October 13, 2004
Spamusement #100: They hold a whole lot of it A person lifts a baby overhead, and the baby projectile vomits a massive stream of liquid directly onto the person's face.
December 20, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
a hot jack hammer rocked the hell out of Minnie

October 18, 2006
Spamusement #328: a hot jack hammer rocked the hell out of Minnie A police officer stands behind tape labeled "POLICE LINE," looking pensively at a tiled wall. A jackhammer is embedded in the wall, surrounded by a massive dark splatter, with a large pool of liquid on the floor below.
December 19, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
U are Stupid Dumbass If U Pay Retail Price For Softwares mentioned

October 1, 2004
Spamusement #88: U are Stupid Dumbass If U Pay Retail Price For Softwares mentioned Four software boxes sitting on a shelf. The top left title is "Virtual Gout" above a frowning face. Top right is "Attempt to Learn Guitar Then Give Up." Bottom left is "Pawn of The Man" featuring a sinister figure in a suit. Bottom right is "Omar Sharif Strip Poker" with a photo of the actor next to playing cards.
December 18, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
making whoppy have never been this staisfying

October 22, 2004
Spamusement #109: making whoppy have never been this staisfying Carrot Top is punched hard in the face by a fist from the right, accompanied by the text "WHOPPY!"
December 17, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
Its a total invasion of privacy!

October 28, 2004
Spamusement #115: Its a total invasion of privacy! A camera viewfinder perspective from inside a mouth, looking out at teeth and a tongue as a toothbrush scrubs. The recording overlay text reads REC, TOOTHBRUSH CAM, and HARDCORE DENTAL ACTION.
December 16, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
New High tech product thats sure to please

February 22, 2005
Spamusement #198: New High tech product thats sure to please A black silhouette of a person dancing against a green background in the style of an iPod advertisement, but instead of a music player, they wear a small white toaster around their neck and eat a slice of toast. The caption reads: 2 slices. In your pocket.
December 15, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
We called you 7 times

March 7, 2005
Spamusement #205: We called you 7 times Commissioner Gordon stands with his hands on his hips, frowning at a sheepish Batman who is nervously touching his fingertips together in front of a dark city skyline with rising smoke.
December 14, 2025 at 3:00 PM
spamusement.rolandcrosby.com
why your computer is running slow

July 16, 2004
Spamusement #6: why your computer is running slow An open desktop computer tower filled with a large lump labeled "Mashed Potatoes what the"
December 13, 2025 at 3:00 PM