ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs
@smartasshat.favrd.social
These are the voyages of the Starship Euphemize. Its five year mission: To explore strange new words, to seek out new jokes and new implications. To boldly go🚽
Pinned
I want an alternate reality where the Christopher-Guest-iverse and the Mel-Brooks-iverse merged in the Eighties. Catherine O’Hara riffing with Madeline Kahn? Inject it straight into my veins.
November 17, 2025 at 3:47 AM
I want an alternate reality where the Christopher-Guest-iverse and the Mel-Brooks-iverse merged in the Eighties. Catherine O’Hara riffing with Madeline Kahn? Inject it straight into my veins.
Somewhere a Columbia professor is recommending George du Maurier’s “Trilby” to Stephen Miller.
Nabokov: "In by book, I wrote about the treatment of Lolita as an examination of human cruelty and selfishness"
Pedophiles: "At long last, we have created Lolita from the classic novel It's Really Bad To Sexually Assault Lolita"
Pedophiles: "At long last, we have created Lolita from the classic novel It's Really Bad To Sexually Assault Lolita"
my new theory is that Jeffrey Epstein read Lolita, actually understood it, and killed himself.
November 16, 2025 at 5:34 PM
Somewhere a Columbia professor is recommending George du Maurier’s “Trilby” to Stephen Miller.
Rachel Maddow wondered why she was invited to the Oval Office.
Then Secret Service blocked the doors and she saw the solid gold bonesaw…
Then Secret Service blocked the doors and she saw the solid gold bonesaw…
Trump pulling out all the stops to welcome Saudi crown prince for first White House visit since Khashoggi killing | CNN Politics
President Donald Trump is planning to receive Saudi Arabia’s powerful Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman at the White House this week with all the trappings of a state visit, sources familiar with the m...
www.cnn.com
November 16, 2025 at 3:56 PM
Rachel Maddow wondered why she was invited to the Oval Office.
Then Secret Service blocked the doors and she saw the solid gold bonesaw…
Then Secret Service blocked the doors and she saw the solid gold bonesaw…
Keystone Kop Krash
Tennessee cop in JD Vance motorcade critically injured in crash with trooper
Tennessee cop in JD Vance motorcade critically injured in crash with trooper
Tennessee cop in JD Vance motorcade critically injured in crash with trooper
www.independent.co.uk
November 15, 2025 at 6:46 PM
Keystone Kop Krash
November 15, 2025 at 6:32 PM
Clinton's blowies could end up being the most powerful force in politics.
November 14, 2025 at 3:45 PM
Clinton's blowies could end up being the most powerful force in politics.
Share a GIF or vid that reminds you of your teenage years
November 14, 2025 at 12:05 AM
Share a GIF or vid that reminds you of your teenage years
You're holding it wrong.
John Fetterman Offers Voters Medical Transparency By Ripping Heart Out Of Chest
LANCASTER, PA—Responding to growing demands from critics that he address ongoing concerns about his health, U.S. Senate candidate John Fetterman reportedly offered voters full medical transparency at ...
theonion.com
November 13, 2025 at 6:35 PM
You're holding it wrong.
Like Great Danes, there are congenital risks to larger human breeds.
Fetterman Struggling To Adapt To Size Of Capitol Building
WASHINGTON—Banging his head against the top of the dome in the rotunda, newly sworn-in Sen. John Fetterman (D-PA) told reporters Wednesday he was struggling to adapt to the size of the Capitol Buildin...
theonion.com
November 13, 2025 at 6:33 PM
Like Great Danes, there are congenital risks to larger human breeds.
Did Liberputians tie him up?
Sen. John Fetterman hospitalized after fall near his home
Sen. John Fetterman's office reported the Pennsylvania Democrat had "sustained a fall" near his home in Braddock, Pennsylvania, during an early Thursday morning walk.
abcnews.go.com
November 13, 2025 at 6:20 PM
Did Liberputians tie him up?
Please name her Hazel.
We're delighted to announce the arrival of a Hoffmann's two-toed sloth, born to Cocoa and Nutella on October 12. Mama and baby are resting up in the sloths' indoor area, but we promise to keep the updates coming! (vid: Celyn F.)
November 13, 2025 at 5:12 PM
Please name her Hazel.
If you have a cat who is confident in their superiority but is intrigued by your incredible ability to open a can, you know what it’s like to live in Florida.
November 13, 2025 at 4:38 PM
If you have a cat who is confident in their superiority but is intrigued by your incredible ability to open a can, you know what it’s like to live in Florida.
The DOJ released an episode of Law & Order to prove that they're doing fine.
🔥 The White House released an article on Monday citing a DoorDash report as confirmation that "inflation has been tamed."
I asked a DoorDash spokesperson today if the company had concluded from its report that inflation had been tamed. DoorDash spokesperson told me, "We did not write that."
I asked a DoorDash spokesperson today if the company had concluded from its report that inflation had been tamed. DoorDash spokesperson told me, "We did not write that."
NEW DATA: Lower Prices, Bigger Paychecks
President Donald J. Trump’s bold economic agenda is delivering real results for American families — with new data from DoorDash’s State of Local Commerce
www.whitehouse.gov
November 12, 2025 at 9:30 PM
The DOJ released an episode of Law & Order to prove that they're doing fine.
Reposted by ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs
“Lauren Boebert’s seat is not safe”
— Sign over bowl of condoms at Denver sex club.
— Sign over bowl of condoms at Denver sex club.
September 18, 2023 at 10:42 PM
“Lauren Boebert’s seat is not safe”
— Sign over bowl of condoms at Denver sex club.
— Sign over bowl of condoms at Denver sex club.
ohpleaseohpleaseohplease be donald in a bikini ohpleaseohpleaseohplease
“would you like photos of donald and girls in bikinis in my kitchen?” -Jeffrey Epstein
November 12, 2025 at 8:52 PM
ohpleaseohpleaseohplease be donald in a bikini ohpleaseohpleaseohplease
Nancy Mace and Lauren Boebert enjoy gross public displays.
November 12, 2025 at 8:37 PM
Nancy Mace and Lauren Boebert enjoy gross public displays.
I’ve never encountered any instance of someone spelling this correctly and it irritates me way more than it should.
Definition of TROUPER
a member of a troupe; especially : actor; a person who deals with and persists through difficulty or hardship without complaint… See the full definition
www.merriam-webster.com
November 12, 2025 at 8:02 PM
I’ve never encountered any instance of someone spelling this correctly and it irritates me way more than it should.
I’m starting to think the full files have proof he drained young girls’ adrenochrome in the basement of a pizza place on Epstein’s Pediff Isle.
November 12, 2025 at 7:09 PM
I’m starting to think the full files have proof he drained young girls’ adrenochrome in the basement of a pizza place on Epstein’s Pediff Isle.
I wonder who is being put in the foundation of the ballroom.
November 12, 2025 at 5:29 PM
I wonder who is being put in the foundation of the ballroom.
What the fuck did she do?
November 12, 2025 at 3:33 AM
What the fuck did she do?
Reposted by ʇɐɥs sɐ ʇɹɐɯs
I’m just asking questions!
November 10, 2025 at 7:24 PM
I’m just asking questions!
Home Depot - Lower Than Lowe’s
“.. As the raids have continued, consumers have started to question whether the company’s silence makes it an accomplice to the sweeps rather than merely the backdrop. .. A backlash is coming for the company.”
@bloomberg.com $HD
www.bloomberg.com/opinion/arti...
@bloomberg.com $HD
www.bloomberg.com/opinion/arti...
November 10, 2025 at 1:13 PM
Home Depot - Lower Than Lowe’s
They can call it The President Emeritus Dome to placate him while everyone else calls it The Pedome.
The White House said Saturday it would be “beautiful” to name the new stadium for Washington’s NFL team after President Donald Trump. INFO: https://www.kwtx.com/2025/11/09/white-house-says-naming-new-washington-commanders-stadium-after-trump-would-be-beautiful/
November 9, 2025 at 11:25 PM
They can call it The President Emeritus Dome to placate him while everyone else calls it The Pedome.