☀️ Jon Schwarz ☀️
@schwarz.bsky.social
☀️ The most important thing to understand about politics is that Head Monkey Good, Not Bad. Stop saying Head Monkey Bad. ☀️
Yes, the US attack on Venezuela is bad news. The good news is we now can count on the powerful new grassroots anti-war movement in the Republican Party to impeach President Trump.
January 3, 2026 at 6:25 PM
Yes, the US attack on Venezuela is bad news. The good news is we now can count on the powerful new grassroots anti-war movement in the Republican Party to impeach President Trump.
All Maduro needs to do is buy $1 billion of Trump's cryptocurrency, he'll be back in the presidential palace in Caracas by this time tomorrow
January 3, 2026 at 1:23 PM
All Maduro needs to do is buy $1 billion of Trump's cryptocurrency, he'll be back in the presidential palace in Caracas by this time tomorrow
At least 80% of human politics is identical to baboon politics, and is just a lot of hooting and shrieking at the other baboons across the river
January 3, 2026 at 4:21 AM
At least 80% of human politics is identical to baboon politics, and is just a lot of hooting and shrieking at the other baboons across the river
This was all news to me about Pluto and Charon. I was especially interested to learn that they have achieved mutual tidal lock, which Astrid Lundberg is right to consider very romantic: www.instagram.com/p/DRx2U-uDKU9/
OddPride on Instagram: "I’m just saying this WOULD work on me
🌒
🦔
🌒
#mindblown #science #astronomy #astrophysics #funfacts"
The Pluto and Karen story is a tale of a cosmic love affair that began billions of years ago when the two celestial bodies formed a unique gravitational bond. With their distinct mass ratio and tidal ...
www.instagram.com
January 2, 2026 at 7:52 PM
This was all news to me about Pluto and Charon. I was especially interested to learn that they have achieved mutual tidal lock, which Astrid Lundberg is right to consider very romantic: www.instagram.com/p/DRx2U-uDKU9/
"It’s not about the money. You see, taxes are an implicit acknowledgment that I exist within society and not above it. That my fate is tethered to the fate of humanity at large. That I am not the special little boy I’ve always believed myself to be."
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/i-w...
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/i-w...
I Will Pay Any Amount to Not Pay My Taxes
Our 6th most-read article of 2025.
- - -I’ve gotten myself into a bit of a jam. A series of natural disasters is barreling towards my home, and th...
www.mcsweeneys.net
January 2, 2026 at 6:47 PM
"It’s not about the money. You see, taxes are an implicit acknowledgment that I exist within society and not above it. That my fate is tethered to the fate of humanity at large. That I am not the special little boy I’ve always believed myself to be."
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/i-w...
www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/i-w...
Trump's corruption is horrifying but the Democrats can't really win elections on theis issue, since their position is "Vote Blue and We'll Bring Back Traditional Corruption That's Classier and Less Extreme" www.nytimes.com/interactive/...
Trump’s Tangled Web of Deal-Making, Policy and Riches (Gift Article)
The president, his family and some of their closest associates have engaged in a sprawling campaign of deals that stretches across industries and the globe.
www.nytimes.com
January 1, 2026 at 10:00 PM
Trump's corruption is horrifying but the Democrats can't really win elections on theis issue, since their position is "Vote Blue and We'll Bring Back Traditional Corruption That's Classier and Less Extreme" www.nytimes.com/interactive/...
Reposted by ☀️ Jon Schwarz ☀️
once again: the onion called it
December 31, 2025 at 8:07 PM
once again: the onion called it
Reposted by ☀️ Jon Schwarz ☀️
Appropriate that they used a Japanese artist’s work to promote internment and deportation. Steal the creativity and labor, cleanse the people.
This looks like something you'd see in a museum about fascism after 100 million people have died to defeat it
January 1, 2026 at 12:21 AM
Appropriate that they used a Japanese artist’s work to promote internment and deportation. Steal the creativity and labor, cleanse the people.
This looks like something you'd see in a museum about fascism after 100 million people have died to defeat it
January 1, 2026 at 12:00 AM
This looks like something you'd see in a museum about fascism after 100 million people have died to defeat it
I am sad indeed to learn of the untimely death of Mike Fossey, a pioneer in online funniness. Pls read this tribute by
@lukeoneil47.bsky.social: flaminghydra.com/in-post-memo...
@lukeoneil47.bsky.social: flaminghydra.com/in-post-memo...
December 31, 2025 at 11:26 PM
I am sad indeed to learn of the untimely death of Mike Fossey, a pioneer in online funniness. Pls read this tribute by
@lukeoneil47.bsky.social: flaminghydra.com/in-post-memo...
@lukeoneil47.bsky.social: flaminghydra.com/in-post-memo...
Less than six hours left to escape from the coming Islamic Republic of New York
December 31, 2025 at 11:12 PM
Less than six hours left to escape from the coming Islamic Republic of New York
Comedian Dan Docimo accurately says, "Nobody's just themselves on stage. ... Because your authentic self is not funny. Your true authentic self is just an extremely vulnerable, little terrified child somewhere in there. Don't be your fucking self, idiot." comedygazelle.com/interviews/f...
December 30, 2025 at 3:31 AM
Comedian Dan Docimo accurately says, "Nobody's just themselves on stage. ... Because your authentic self is not funny. Your true authentic self is just an extremely vulnerable, little terrified child somewhere in there. Don't be your fucking self, idiot." comedygazelle.com/interviews/f...
This guy used to be an investment banker with Salomon Brothers & Citigroup. There are tons of cranks like him at the top of American society who truly believe these right-wing urban legends. It's like he's earnestly explaining the existence of Slender Man.
December 30, 2025 at 3:01 AM
This guy used to be an investment banker with Salomon Brothers & Citigroup. There are tons of cranks like him at the top of American society who truly believe these right-wing urban legends. It's like he's earnestly explaining the existence of Slender Man.
Please watch all of this important and moving story www.instagram.com/p/DPxo6qVkUbo/
Alexia Delarosa on Instagram: "hurt and confused"
Learn from this dating expert's mistakes and discover how to communicate your boundaries effectively, ensuring a healthy and fulfilling relationship. In this video, our expert shares her personal stor...
www.instagram.com
December 27, 2025 at 6:55 PM
Please watch all of this important and moving story www.instagram.com/p/DPxo6qVkUbo/
Reposted by ☀️ Jon Schwarz ☀️
So I have the cover story in next month's TNR.
I interviewed the heads of police groups; immigration defense attorneys, ex-judges and ex-prosecutors; former DOJ and DHS officials, and the former head of Border Patrol.
They're all horrified at what we've seen, and they all fear what's coming.
I interviewed the heads of police groups; immigration defense attorneys, ex-judges and ex-prosecutors; former DOJ and DHS officials, and the former head of Border Patrol.
They're all horrified at what we've seen, and they all fear what's coming.
Trump’s Immigration Nightmare: It Is Happening Here
With astonishing speed, the administration has toppled the most cherished pillars of a free society. And the experts agree: It’s all going to get much, much worse.
newrepublic.com
December 24, 2025 at 3:08 PM
So I have the cover story in next month's TNR.
I interviewed the heads of police groups; immigration defense attorneys, ex-judges and ex-prosecutors; former DOJ and DHS officials, and the former head of Border Patrol.
They're all horrified at what we've seen, and they all fear what's coming.
I interviewed the heads of police groups; immigration defense attorneys, ex-judges and ex-prosecutors; former DOJ and DHS officials, and the former head of Border Patrol.
They're all horrified at what we've seen, and they all fear what's coming.
This is an excellent & important article in the Washington Post from last month about how billionaires have seized control of US politics. However, in the spirit of Christmas churlishness, I still want to complain about it: washingtonpost.com/politics/int...
December 24, 2025 at 5:26 PM
This is an excellent & important article in the Washington Post from last month about how billionaires have seized control of US politics. However, in the spirit of Christmas churlishness, I still want to complain about it: washingtonpost.com/politics/int...
Remember the 1920s when nobody was left-handed
December 24, 2025 at 5:13 PM
Remember the 1920s when nobody was left-handed
Reposted by ☀️ Jon Schwarz ☀️
In 2023 I became obsessed with videos of dads in cargo shortswaiting in parking lots during Taylor Swift's Eras Tour. So when she came to town, I grabbed a camera and headed down to talk to them. I thought it'd be funny. It turned out to be something else entirely.
December 23, 2025 at 9:18 PM
In 2023 I became obsessed with videos of dads in cargo shortswaiting in parking lots during Taylor Swift's Eras Tour. So when she came to town, I grabbed a camera and headed down to talk to them. I thought it'd be funny. It turned out to be something else entirely.
One confusing thing about liberal media outlets like the NY Times and CNN is that they're extremely right-wing:
open.substack.com/pub/thecolum... by
@ahjohnson.bsky.social
open.substack.com/pub/thecolum... by
@ahjohnson.bsky.social
US Media Rushes to Manufacture Legal Legitimacy for Trump’s Venezuela Oil Tanker Piracy
Venezuela oil exports are not “black market” and US sanctions are not “international sanctions.” Why does our media keep saying otherwise?
open.substack.com
December 24, 2025 at 4:35 PM
One confusing thing about liberal media outlets like the NY Times and CNN is that they're extremely right-wing:
open.substack.com/pub/thecolum... by
@ahjohnson.bsky.social
open.substack.com/pub/thecolum... by
@ahjohnson.bsky.social
To everyone's surprise my friend @michaelgerber.bsky.social's humor magazine The American Bystander appears in the Epstein files. This is 100% not a joke. Subscribe now so you don't have to wait until the next document release for Bystander content. theamericanbystander.substack.com/p/hey-im-in-...
Hey, I’m in the Epstein doc dump! (Well, sort of)
It's not what you think. Keep reading.
theamericanbystander.substack.com
December 22, 2025 at 6:39 PM
To everyone's surprise my friend @michaelgerber.bsky.social's humor magazine The American Bystander appears in the Epstein files. This is 100% not a joke. Subscribe now so you don't have to wait until the next document release for Bystander content. theamericanbystander.substack.com/p/hey-im-in-...
I feel spiritually close to Greg Grandin because we both rejoice in bumming people out in this specific way. The 2015 story about CBS's previous malfeasance on El Salvador that Grandin linked to is here: www.thenation.com/article/arch...
December 22, 2025 at 5:31 PM
I feel spiritually close to Greg Grandin because we both rejoice in bumming people out in this specific way. The 2015 story about CBS's previous malfeasance on El Salvador that Grandin linked to is here: www.thenation.com/article/arch...
As Noam Chomsky has said, "We shouldn't be looking for heroes, we should be looking for good ideas. ... These are human beings after all. Like each of us is. If we look into ourselves honestly we'll find an odd mixture."
December 22, 2025 at 5:26 PM
As Noam Chomsky has said, "We shouldn't be looking for heroes, we should be looking for good ideas. ... These are human beings after all. Like each of us is. If we look into ourselves honestly we'll find an odd mixture."
Reposted by ☀️ Jon Schwarz ☀️
Current issue of @theonion.com nails it again.
December 21, 2025 at 11:03 PM
Current issue of @theonion.com nails it again.