River Side Casino
@riversidecasino.bsky.social
The Midwest’s Best Casino On This Side Of The Hoover River
Slots, table games, golf, luxury spa, sweat lodge, ball pit, dining options, concert/convention center, and some other stuff. Definitely haunted.
Contributors: https://go.bsky.app/4yomz8H
Slots, table games, golf, luxury spa, sweat lodge, ball pit, dining options, concert/convention center, and some other stuff. Definitely haunted.
Contributors: https://go.bsky.app/4yomz8H
Pinned
Our present and past/escaped contributors do amazing work here on Bluesky for which they are compensated handsomely. Still, throw them a pity follow. We'll count it as their Christmas bonus.
go.bsky.app/4yomz8H
go.bsky.app/4yomz8H
Come to River Side Casino to celebrate Cylon Monday.
Yeah, you read that right.
Yeah, you read that right.
November 22, 2025 at 8:48 PM
Come to River Side Casino to celebrate Cylon Monday.
Yeah, you read that right.
Yeah, you read that right.
Inspectors are 99% certain the dice are no longer coated with fast-acting poison. C'mon 7!
November 22, 2025 at 6:13 PM
Inspectors are 99% certain the dice are no longer coated with fast-acting poison. C'mon 7!
Although we can't name her name yet, we will be welcoming a new HR manager the first week of January.
November 22, 2025 at 2:44 AM
Although we can't name her name yet, we will be welcoming a new HR manager the first week of January.
Reposted by River Side Casino
The secret to our success is treating everyone, even the idiots, with respect.
April 20, 2024 at 8:12 PM
The secret to our success is treating everyone, even the idiots, with respect.
Reposted by River Side Casino
We have a surplus of "Kevin" employee badges. There is a $75 hiring bonus if your name is Kevin.
November 15, 2023 at 5:28 AM
We have a surplus of "Kevin" employee badges. There is a $75 hiring bonus if your name is Kevin.
You do not want what the feral cats are offering for Black Friday.
November 21, 2025 at 7:25 PM
You do not want what the feral cats are offering for Black Friday.
We’re trying something new this weekend and opening up the first Human Petting Zoo. Please don’t make it weird.
November 21, 2025 at 6:21 PM
We’re trying something new this weekend and opening up the first Human Petting Zoo. Please don’t make it weird.
The state police have shut down our annual William Tell Festival. On a completely unrelated note, our inaugural Crossbow Symposium and Apple Vendors' Weekend both kick off next month.
November 20, 2025 at 11:50 PM
The state police have shut down our annual William Tell Festival. On a completely unrelated note, our inaugural Crossbow Symposium and Apple Vendors' Weekend both kick off next month.
It is either perfect timing or terrible timing. Either way, our new Noisy Piggy slot machine has just arrived on the casino floor.
November 19, 2025 at 10:18 PM
It is either perfect timing or terrible timing. Either way, our new Noisy Piggy slot machine has just arrived on the casino floor.
Congratulations to Amos Carroll, winner of this year's poker tournament. If you are reading this, Amos, you can pick up your lucky rat's tooth at the lost and found.
November 18, 2025 at 10:56 PM
Congratulations to Amos Carroll, winner of this year's poker tournament. If you are reading this, Amos, you can pick up your lucky rat's tooth at the lost and found.
Good news: the Cloudflare outage has not affected our online betting servers in Russia.
November 18, 2025 at 3:46 PM
Good news: the Cloudflare outage has not affected our online betting servers in Russia.
No, those were not vampire coffins being loaded into the building last night. They were just regular coffins.
November 18, 2025 at 2:53 AM
No, those were not vampire coffins being loaded into the building last night. They were just regular coffins.
Please be patient with our dining manager Wilton as he deals with a protracted legal dispute with his neighbor over a boundary line.
November 17, 2025 at 6:50 PM
Please be patient with our dining manager Wilton as he deals with a protracted legal dispute with his neighbor over a boundary line.
We won't claim to have loose slots, but our bartenders can point out machines that have weird electrical problems and others that collect human souls.
November 16, 2025 at 8:44 PM
We won't claim to have loose slots, but our bartenders can point out machines that have weird electrical problems and others that collect human souls.
Guests who visit us during December can get 15% off their stay if they agree to take part in our live Nativity.
November 16, 2025 at 6:13 PM
Guests who visit us during December can get 15% off their stay if they agree to take part in our live Nativity.
Yeah, we haven’t posted anything in a day. How’s this one? Pretty great, right?
November 15, 2025 at 4:27 AM
Yeah, we haven’t posted anything in a day. How’s this one? Pretty great, right?
There is a mirror in room 402 that shows viewers their reflections 32 seconds into the future. It has saved and ended many lives. We cannot take it down. We have tried.
November 13, 2025 at 8:54 PM
There is a mirror in room 402 that shows viewers their reflections 32 seconds into the future. It has saved and ended many lives. We cannot take it down. We have tried.
Feeling lucky? Pop over to the convention center for a free spinal adjustment from the Hoover County Chiropractic Boarding School freshman class.
November 12, 2025 at 11:02 PM
Feeling lucky? Pop over to the convention center for a free spinal adjustment from the Hoover County Chiropractic Boarding School freshman class.
Our CEO will be pardoning one turkey next weekend, in the traditional manner. The other 99 turkeys will be forced to keep working in our Bitcoin mines.
November 12, 2025 at 5:07 PM
Our CEO will be pardoning one turkey next weekend, in the traditional manner. The other 99 turkeys will be forced to keep working in our Bitcoin mines.
Myth: Seeing a nocturnal animal during the daytime automatically means they have rabies.
Fact: If the raccoon in our parking garage bit you, it probably had a good reason.
Fact: If the raccoon in our parking garage bit you, it probably had a good reason.
November 12, 2025 at 2:07 AM
Myth: Seeing a nocturnal animal during the daytime automatically means they have rabies.
Fact: If the raccoon in our parking garage bit you, it probably had a good reason.
Fact: If the raccoon in our parking garage bit you, it probably had a good reason.
Unlike a moth to a porch light, do not bang your head against the shiny, blinking slot machines.
November 11, 2025 at 4:59 PM
Unlike a moth to a porch light, do not bang your head against the shiny, blinking slot machines.
We offer all new employees a chance to wrestle the moat monster for health care on day one.
November 11, 2025 at 1:53 AM
We offer all new employees a chance to wrestle the moat monster for health care on day one.
Rudy Guliani is still alive? We don't know WHO that was having a heart attack in our parking lot.
November 10, 2025 at 7:43 PM
Rudy Guliani is still alive? We don't know WHO that was having a heart attack in our parking lot.
Yes, the odds are in the casino's favor but odds are for suckers, right?
November 10, 2025 at 5:03 PM
Yes, the odds are in the casino's favor but odds are for suckers, right?
This weekend on the River Side Main Stage, it's The Rolling Four, playing the music of the Beatles while dressed as the Rolling Stones.
November 9, 2025 at 8:40 PM
This weekend on the River Side Main Stage, it's The Rolling Four, playing the music of the Beatles while dressed as the Rolling Stones.