uint16
@remix.net
I just want to make jokes about stupid stuff all day and I will play “Yes, and” and “No, but” in replies. I just want to make dumb jokes and I know they’re dumb.
Pinned
I pass on “i’m shook” post titles - you have low tolerance to unexpected outcomes, congrats.
January 12, 2026 at 10:38 PM
I pass on “i’m shook” post titles - you have low tolerance to unexpected outcomes, congrats.
Am I the only person putting cholula on top on costco frozen cordon bleu to make it buffalo cordon bleu?
January 12, 2026 at 8:59 AM
Am I the only person putting cholula on top on costco frozen cordon bleu to make it buffalo cordon bleu?
Sydney Sweeney traditional media coverage about her boobs reaches troubling and confusing 145% market airtime saturation.
January 11, 2026 at 8:35 AM
Sydney Sweeney traditional media coverage about her boobs reaches troubling and confusing 145% market airtime saturation.
All the high end tools I was convinced I needed for projects I never started.
Donating them to the local non-profit maker space.
This vignette presented by ADHD
Donating them to the local non-profit maker space.
This vignette presented by ADHD
January 9, 2026 at 6:50 AM
All the high end tools I was convinced I needed for projects I never started.
Donating them to the local non-profit maker space.
This vignette presented by ADHD
Donating them to the local non-profit maker space.
This vignette presented by ADHD
In a movie in a future UI, if you have a
counter with variable width font where the length of the text changes when digits change, I’m taking my life and will @ in my suicide note.
counter with variable width font where the length of the text changes when digits change, I’m taking my life and will @ in my suicide note.
January 8, 2026 at 6:50 AM
In a movie in a future UI, if you have a
counter with variable width font where the length of the text changes when digits change, I’m taking my life and will @ in my suicide note.
counter with variable width font where the length of the text changes when digits change, I’m taking my life and will @ in my suicide note.
A neighbor on the block has made the decision to deal with vegetation around his house by driving his 4x4 in a tight circuit to make a giant mud pit
I could go to each of
my neighbors houses, honk their boobs, spit in their mouth, and they’d still hate that guy more.
Really takes the pressure off!
I could go to each of
my neighbors houses, honk their boobs, spit in their mouth, and they’d still hate that guy more.
Really takes the pressure off!
January 8, 2026 at 4:13 AM
A neighbor on the block has made the decision to deal with vegetation around his house by driving his 4x4 in a tight circuit to make a giant mud pit
I could go to each of
my neighbors houses, honk their boobs, spit in their mouth, and they’d still hate that guy more.
Really takes the pressure off!
I could go to each of
my neighbors houses, honk their boobs, spit in their mouth, and they’d still hate that guy more.
Really takes the pressure off!
I would pay for an entire album of Carl from Aqua Teen Hunger Force singing rock ballads.
January 7, 2026 at 11:32 PM
I would pay for an entire album of Carl from Aqua Teen Hunger Force singing rock ballads.
SNL sketch pitch: An office for a company named “The FUPA Company”and nobody wants to say the name out loud or when they answer phones.
January 6, 2026 at 10:26 PM
SNL sketch pitch: An office for a company named “The FUPA Company”and nobody wants to say the name out loud or when they answer phones.
Cat aficionados: How can you teach cats better butt maintenance?
So far peanut butter doesn’t seem the right direction.
So far peanut butter doesn’t seem the right direction.
January 6, 2026 at 12:28 AM
Cat aficionados: How can you teach cats better butt maintenance?
So far peanut butter doesn’t seem the right direction.
So far peanut butter doesn’t seem the right direction.
First time I’ve gone to sleep with a headache and woken up with a headache.
January 5, 2026 at 8:02 PM
First time I’ve gone to sleep with a headache and woken up with a headache.
It’s a Native American trick to get me to pee the bed.
January 1, 2026 at 6:02 AM
It’s a Native American trick to get me to pee the bed.
All these years I’ve carefully managed to avoid the limelight by being just dumb enough I didn’t matter, not dumb enough “I had a relationship with an intern”
January 1, 2026 at 3:11 AM
All these years I’ve carefully managed to avoid the limelight by being just dumb enough I didn’t matter, not dumb enough “I had a relationship with an intern”
You never forget your first smartest man in the room.
December 31, 2025 at 7:37 PM
You never forget your first smartest man in the room.
If this van’s a rockin’, we’re likely having a small earthquake
December 31, 2025 at 5:08 PM
If this van’s a rockin’, we’re likely having a small earthquake
I don’t goto all you can eat #restaurants in order to to maintain the delicate balance of “and everybody clapped” posts on #foodservice subreddits.
Order must be maintained, and less people need to know about my terrible secrets.
Order must be maintained, and less people need to know about my terrible secrets.
December 31, 2025 at 1:59 AM
I don’t goto all you can eat #restaurants in order to to maintain the delicate balance of “and everybody clapped” posts on #foodservice subreddits.
Order must be maintained, and less people need to know about my terrible secrets.
Order must be maintained, and less people need to know about my terrible secrets.
Reposted by uint16
The celestial lottery we won to be sentient when the default is empty space, rock or farts.
December 30, 2025 at 3:04 AM
The celestial lottery we won to be sentient when the default is empty space, rock or farts.
I sure hope jumping into the meat grinder will provide sustenance for my replacement!
December 29, 2025 at 12:03 AM
I sure hope jumping into the meat grinder will provide sustenance for my replacement!
Talent borrows, genius jerks-off in the shower.
December 22, 2025 at 1:18 AM
Talent borrows, genius jerks-off in the shower.
Narcissist Santa: “.. and if that WAS what I gave you, you deserved it.”
December 21, 2025 at 11:33 PM
Narcissist Santa: “.. and if that WAS what I gave you, you deserved it.”
If you were witness to a “Deez Nuts” joke at your work place you may be eligible for compensation.
December 20, 2025 at 9:24 PM
If you were witness to a “Deez Nuts” joke at your work place you may be eligible for compensation.
Johnny Depp hits the button that reveals the fireman’s pole down to the Sparrow Cave.
He descends the poll mostly silently, with a modicum of hand squeaking.
Once in the ground he walks into a 8 chamber room with 8 Captain Jack Sparrow suits in their own alcoves.
He grins, It’s stumblin’ time! 🏴☠️
He descends the poll mostly silently, with a modicum of hand squeaking.
Once in the ground he walks into a 8 chamber room with 8 Captain Jack Sparrow suits in their own alcoves.
He grins, It’s stumblin’ time! 🏴☠️
December 20, 2025 at 5:51 PM
Johnny Depp hits the button that reveals the fireman’s pole down to the Sparrow Cave.
He descends the poll mostly silently, with a modicum of hand squeaking.
Once in the ground he walks into a 8 chamber room with 8 Captain Jack Sparrow suits in their own alcoves.
He grins, It’s stumblin’ time! 🏴☠️
He descends the poll mostly silently, with a modicum of hand squeaking.
Once in the ground he walks into a 8 chamber room with 8 Captain Jack Sparrow suits in their own alcoves.
He grins, It’s stumblin’ time! 🏴☠️
Technology moves so fast every time I turn around there’s a smaller, faster Gom Jabar.
December 19, 2025 at 11:21 PM
Technology moves so fast every time I turn around there’s a smaller, faster Gom Jabar.