@oregonlawguy.bsky.social
Father, lawyer, dog lover, Orioles fan.
It’s a Dark Side of the Moon kind of day.
December 12, 2025 at 4:16 PM
It’s a Dark Side of the Moon kind of day.
9 year old just got upset at me for saying “fuck” twice. Damn me for responding to work emails in her presence.
December 8, 2025 at 9:05 PM
9 year old just got upset at me for saying “fuck” twice. Damn me for responding to work emails in her presence.
Opposing counsel (in very scary, threatening voice): We’ll be filing a motion to amend and a motion to compel.
Me:
Me:
a man says " i wanna be just like you " in front of a breakfast club logo
ALT: a man says " i wanna be just like you " in front of a breakfast club logo
media.tenor.com
December 4, 2025 at 9:46 AM
Opposing counsel (in very scary, threatening voice): We’ll be filing a motion to amend and a motion to compel.
Me:
Me:
My Spotify age is one month off from my actual age.
December 4, 2025 at 9:38 AM
My Spotify age is one month off from my actual age.
Opposing counsel is named Moe and my son wants me to prank him like Bart Simpson would.
December 1, 2025 at 4:28 PM
Opposing counsel is named Moe and my son wants me to prank him like Bart Simpson would.
Im now the client that emails his lawyer regularly asking for updates. At least my issue is time sensitive so I feel less bad about it. But man, I don’t like being on the other side. #visastuff
November 26, 2025 at 10:12 AM
Im now the client that emails his lawyer regularly asking for updates. At least my issue is time sensitive so I feel less bad about it. But man, I don’t like being on the other side. #visastuff
Sometimes you just need to tell someone to fuck off and it will make you feel so much better. Even if you say it in a more professional manner.
November 14, 2025 at 11:12 PM
Sometimes you just need to tell someone to fuck off and it will make you feel so much better. Even if you say it in a more professional manner.
I’ve only met one person named Angel that was nice.
November 13, 2025 at 7:36 PM
I’ve only met one person named Angel that was nice.
Uno!
An elected official in Nevada was determined by a card draw.
Casino-style card draw used to break election tie
An elected official in Nevada was determined by a card draw on Wednesday.
www.kptv.com
November 7, 2025 at 1:05 PM
Uno!
I’ve had that Bruno Mars song stuck in my head for 3 days and I can assure you that if I die right now I won’t be smiling.
November 7, 2025 at 7:55 AM
I’ve had that Bruno Mars song stuck in my head for 3 days and I can assure you that if I die right now I won’t be smiling.
Roses are red… ah, fk it, everything is blue today.
November 5, 2025 at 9:24 AM
Roses are red… ah, fk it, everything is blue today.
Chauncey Billups has had bettor days.
October 23, 2025 at 4:54 PM
Chauncey Billups has had bettor days.
An SNL skit where Kristi Noem turns into a Kristi gnome.
October 14, 2025 at 1:37 PM
An SNL skit where Kristi Noem turns into a Kristi gnome.
Ketchup
Titanic
Walking on the Sun
Titanic
Walking on the Sun
Celery
Slumdog Millionaire
Hey There Delilah
Slumdog Millionaire
Hey There Delilah
Introduce yourself using one food you refuse to eat, one movie you'll never watch again, and one song you can't stand.
Hummus
Fruitvale Station
Before I Let Go
Hummus
Fruitvale Station
Before I Let Go
October 13, 2025 at 7:26 PM
Ketchup
Titanic
Walking on the Sun
Titanic
Walking on the Sun
When your college kid buys you mini cokes and you Venmo her back and the reason is “coke.” Nothing to see here.
October 10, 2025 at 7:41 PM
When your college kid buys you mini cokes and you Venmo her back and the reason is “coke.” Nothing to see here.
Opposing counsel is always going to want you to include 5 other people on every email you send. 100% of the time the majority of the recipients will have automatic out of office replies.
October 10, 2025 at 4:55 PM
Opposing counsel is always going to want you to include 5 other people on every email you send. 100% of the time the majority of the recipients will have automatic out of office replies.
If Kristi Noem was an actual gnome, what kind of gnome would she be?
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encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com
October 8, 2025 at 9:59 AM
If Kristi Noem was an actual gnome, what kind of gnome would she be?
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This one? encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn...
Another wonderful day of remote work.
October 3, 2025 at 11:53 AM
Another wonderful day of remote work.
My former neighbor shared this picture of Lily, the poodle, on the steps of the ICE building in Portland. Looks very dangerous there.
September 30, 2025 at 4:41 PM
My former neighbor shared this picture of Lily, the poodle, on the steps of the ICE building in Portland. Looks very dangerous there.
Bleach good. Tylenol bad. Got it.
September 22, 2025 at 9:56 PM
Bleach good. Tylenol bad. Got it.
Kimmel and Colbert should do a Prove Me Wrong tour.
September 18, 2025 at 9:34 AM
Kimmel and Colbert should do a Prove Me Wrong tour.
Career highlight: winning a hearing against a lawyer I can’t stand while in my new home in Portugal with a palm tree behind me so opposing counsel had to look at it throughout the hearing.
My work here is done.
My work here is done.
September 13, 2025 at 7:52 AM
Career highlight: winning a hearing against a lawyer I can’t stand while in my new home in Portugal with a palm tree behind me so opposing counsel had to look at it throughout the hearing.
My work here is done.
My work here is done.
Currently in my new country. Woohoo.
September 4, 2025 at 2:16 PM
Currently in my new country. Woohoo.
In the air headed to my new home.
September 4, 2025 at 12:53 AM
In the air headed to my new home.
Weekend at Bernie’s vibes.
They're positioning him behind more objects than a pregnant sitcom actress
Trump leaves the White House this morning
(Andrew Caballero/Getty)
(Andrew Caballero/Getty)
September 1, 2025 at 5:05 PM
Weekend at Bernie’s vibes.