Chris - Tortured Systems Engineer™️
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optesterchris.bsky.social
Chris - Tortured Systems Engineer™️
@optesterchris.bsky.social
Navy (ret) Surface Warfare Officer & missile defender with a side of fries. I taught Zach Mayo everything he knows. A perfectly flawed human. Opinions = my own.
My daily shutdown affirmation
November 11, 2025 at 12:25 PM
Current mood
November 10, 2025 at 6:59 PM
My daily shutdown affirmation
November 10, 2025 at 12:41 PM
Don’t forget to leave out cheap whiskey & crayons out for Chesty Puller, Pappy Boyington, Bea Arthur, Ed McMahon, Steve McQueen, Lee Marvin, Brian Dennehy, George Peppard, R. Lee Ermey, Navajo code talkers, & the other dead Marines or they will haunt your nightmares.

Rah?

Rah!
a man in a military uniform stands in front of a group of men
ALT: a man in a military uniform stands in front of a group of men
media.tenor.com
November 9, 2025 at 8:57 PM
My daily shutdown affirmation
November 9, 2025 at 1:33 PM
I find your lack of Christmas cheer disturbing
November 9, 2025 at 1:05 AM
An attempt to get into the Christmas mood.

Crazy Saturday night over here.
November 8, 2025 at 10:26 PM
Lazy Saturday. Lazy dog.
November 8, 2025 at 6:22 PM
My daily shutdown affirmation
November 8, 2025 at 11:38 AM
My daily shutdown affirmation
November 7, 2025 at 1:37 PM
My daily shutdown affirmation
November 6, 2025 at 3:43 PM
Someone wanted to go on a walk a 2pm and have dinner at 3pm.

I’m not arguing with her. How can I with that smile on her face?
November 5, 2025 at 7:58 PM
My daily government shutdown affirmation
November 5, 2025 at 12:33 PM
If you are in need during this difficult time in the US and have an Aldi nearby, the store is making an effort to make sure your family can enjoy Thanksgiving.

It is my hope that everyone can enjoy and find a measure of peace this holiday season.

corporate.aldi.us/newsroom/new...
November 5, 2025 at 1:11 AM
He obviously did not relish the opportunity
Border Patrol agent Lairmore testifies that he was not injured by the sandwich, but he felt the impact through his ballistic vest.

The sandwich came apart and "kind of exploded" on his chest upon impact, he says.

"I could smell the onions and mustard."
November 4, 2025 at 5:58 PM
I got 9 hours of sleep and it was glorious.
November 4, 2025 at 12:11 PM
For the second day in a row I’m contemplating getting into bed before 8pm. Sunset at around 5pm is doing something to me.
kermit the frog and darth vader from the muppets are standing next to each other in the dark .
ALT: kermit the frog and darth vader from the muppets are standing next to each other in the dark .
media.tenor.com
November 4, 2025 at 1:12 AM
I’m in trouble, y’all.
November 3, 2025 at 5:38 PM
Life is hard when your dog does not recognize Eastern Standard Time from Eastern Daylight Saving Time.
November 2, 2025 at 9:31 PM
Filthy Hobbitses!
November 1, 2025 at 1:49 PM
This is a public service announcement:

Christmas starts after dessert is eaten on Thanksgiving Day. Premature decorations, Christmas trees, and Christmas songs are a sure signs of insanity.

Thank you. And enjoy your turkey and stuffing.
a boxer dog is looking at a pumpkin pie on a cooling rack
ALT: a boxer dog is looking at a pumpkin pie on a cooling rack
media.tenor.com
November 1, 2025 at 11:13 AM
Happy Halloween to everyone except people who give these out to Trick-or-Treaters
October 31, 2025 at 2:15 PM
“I need someone who will make people laugh, even on their hardest days. Someone who will fill empty hearts and heal broken ones. I need someone with a keen awareness of sadness and grief, who will never be afraid to acknowledge it.”

So God gave us dogs.
October 30, 2025 at 8:10 PM
Breakfast for lunch because nothing matters anymore.
October 30, 2025 at 5:10 PM