jacob
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mutantlawyer.bsky.social
jacob
@mutantlawyer.bsky.social
he/they, queer, denver, 29, ♉️, happily taken

a haunted victorian doll posing as a functional adult
Pinned
dressing up fancy and telling people about my job, two of my favorite things
work project i was assigned basically right when i started bc it was supposed to be simple has been dragging out and getting more complicated every time i think i'm almost done and it's getting incredibly tempting to simply walk into the mountains and disappear
February 13, 2026 at 3:47 PM
had to give a presentation this morning and i've gotten several compliments from coworkers about my public speaking skills 🥹
February 12, 2026 at 5:44 PM
happy birthday to my wonderful beautiful boyfriend who i love very much
February 11, 2026 at 7:42 PM
oh thank god, i have missed the post workshop/vault of unhinged nonsense 😌
v1.116 is rolling out now!

For all the overthinkers and perfectionists out there, we're launching Drafts.
February 10, 2026 at 2:59 PM
it's my one in-office day for the week!
February 5, 2026 at 6:43 PM
QTP with your favorite video game villain in a gif if you can!
February 5, 2026 at 3:15 PM
i'm getting edits/feedback on a project due at the end of the week instead of being told "you're so beautiful and good at your job, this is perfect and you can take the rest of the week off!" 😔
February 3, 2026 at 5:23 PM
Reposted by jacob
February 2, 2026 at 6:20 PM
everybody be cool about how much i spent on magic cards today. i am very cool and normal when i pick up new hobbies!
February 1, 2026 at 2:57 AM
Reposted by jacob
Catherine O’Hara gave us all so much. Her comedy inspired me. Her characters served as proxy mothers for many of us.

All of our lives, and our culture more broadly, are better because of her life and work.
Catherine O'Hara Dead at 71
Catherine O'Hara -- famous for her work in "Schitt's Creek," "Home Alone," and "Best In Show" -- is dead ... TMZ has learned.
www.tmz.com
January 30, 2026 at 6:24 PM
heartbreaking: my overnight oatmeal is really gross today 😔
January 29, 2026 at 6:18 PM
the way harry styles can simultaneously be so loud and so quiet when he sings...it needs to be studied
January 29, 2026 at 1:55 AM
grateful for getting to dress up like a fancy adult for work every day
January 28, 2026 at 3:48 PM
nothing like barely dodging crashing out entirely just when i was starting to feel better
January 28, 2026 at 12:11 AM
Reposted by jacob
a not insignificant number of people on Threads seem to believe the snow storm was The Government's attempt to refreeze the Leviathan, the world-eating serpent, which was getting loose (to eat the world, I assume)
January 26, 2026 at 4:56 PM
this is who you're making work 40+ hours per week btw
January 26, 2026 at 3:00 PM
survived the worst day of this bonkers week. so glad tomorrow is friday 🫩
January 23, 2026 at 12:45 AM
book #1 of 2026 ✅

fantastic read, another cerebral but accessible story in the same vein as babel (which i also loved), with some interesting meditations on the ways we treat ourselves and each other always ought to be more gentle
January 22, 2026 at 8:39 PM
lorwyn bundle came in today 🥰🤓

(noah always ends up pulling the cooler cards)
January 21, 2026 at 4:23 AM
sneak perk of legal training is becoming an expert in writing polite but pointed emails to fix other people causing you problems
January 20, 2026 at 4:30 PM
Reposted by jacob
Checking the news
January 19, 2026 at 2:39 PM
i have to work today (which i was fully aware of and agreed to and get other holidays off later in the year to make up for it) and it's just not fair!!! 😭
January 19, 2026 at 2:41 PM
why has my body chosen to inflict this terrible illness* on me??

*a medium-bad cold
January 16, 2026 at 12:18 AM
if anyone has ~$700 and love in their heart...
Serebii Picture: Box of the LEGO Pokémon Venusaur, Charizard, & Blastoise set (72153)

www.serebii.net
January 12, 2026 at 3:22 PM
awake, but at what cost?
January 12, 2026 at 2:38 PM