"Mr. Goals"
@mrgoals.bsky.social
Powerfully introspective and meaningfully meta.
Reposted by "Mr. Goals"
rip in advance to Scott "Mr Dilbert" Adams who is perhaps most famous for writing a now-deleted four part blog post where he attempted to hypnotize his readers into nutting and asked them to email him after they have nutted to tell him about the nut.
www.tumblr.com/manlethotlin...
www.tumblr.com/manlethotlin...
November 2, 2025 at 7:20 PM
rip in advance to Scott "Mr Dilbert" Adams who is perhaps most famous for writing a now-deleted four part blog post where he attempted to hypnotize his readers into nutting and asked them to email him after they have nutted to tell him about the nut.
www.tumblr.com/manlethotlin...
www.tumblr.com/manlethotlin...
think aboat it
who decided that.. ok let me back up first. so the greatest of all time is GOAT, but the best of all time would be BOAT, right? so I'm thinking, who was like, that the Titanic is the GOAT? for me the Titanic is the BOAT. I know it's a ship, but still. let that sink in... (because the titanic sinked)
January 1, 2026 at 6:02 PM
think aboat it
who decided that.. ok let me back up first. so the greatest of all time is GOAT, but the best of all time would be BOAT, right? so I'm thinking, who was like, that the Titanic is the GOAT? for me the Titanic is the BOAT. I know it's a ship, but still. let that sink in... (because the titanic sinked)
January 1, 2026 at 11:22 AM
who decided that.. ok let me back up first. so the greatest of all time is GOAT, but the best of all time would be BOAT, right? so I'm thinking, who was like, that the Titanic is the GOAT? for me the Titanic is the BOAT. I know it's a ship, but still. let that sink in... (because the titanic sinked)
Reposted by "Mr. Goals"
Rachel Sennott is our favorite insurance nepo baby.
YouTube video by Good Hang with Amy Poehler
youtube.com
December 17, 2025 at 2:01 PM
Reposted by "Mr. Goals"
Same way I found out about Epstein
December 15, 2025 at 4:58 PM
Same way I found out about Epstein
*about to put a spider that lived its whole life in my house outside* aww it will be so much happier than in here ☺️
December 2, 2025 at 11:16 PM
*about to put a spider that lived its whole life in my house outside* aww it will be so much happier than in here ☺️
Reposted by "Mr. Goals"
What if we razed every Data Center to the ground and salted the earth where they stood
December 1, 2025 at 3:40 AM
What if we razed every Data Center to the ground and salted the earth where they stood
nobody told me so much of adult life is going to be about managing the battery levels of your different devices 😭😭😭😭😭
November 30, 2025 at 8:53 AM
nobody told me so much of adult life is going to be about managing the battery levels of your different devices 😭😭😭😭😭
Reposted by "Mr. Goals"
🚨🚨🚨PFT ON THE POD AND A FREE VIDEO EPISODE🚨🚨🚨 chuffed to bits to have the absolute legend himself on the show youtu.be/d7pk0HH7Jss?...
The Theater with Paul F. Tompkins | What's All This Then | Ep. 30
YouTube video by What's All This Then
youtu.be
November 24, 2025 at 3:56 PM
🚨🚨🚨PFT ON THE POD AND A FREE VIDEO EPISODE🚨🚨🚨 chuffed to bits to have the absolute legend himself on the show youtu.be/d7pk0HH7Jss?...
I let the dogs out
November 22, 2025 at 11:18 PM
I let the dogs out
I just heard some terrible news. Jay Leno finally had to touch his Tonight Show money. Please keep him in your thoughts 🙏
November 22, 2025 at 1:49 PM
I just heard some terrible news. Jay Leno finally had to touch his Tonight Show money. Please keep him in your thoughts 🙏
when your pee smells like the espresso you drank an hour ago >>>>>>
November 16, 2025 at 3:04 PM
when your pee smells like the espresso you drank an hour ago >>>>>>
To me, 69 is the ultimate sex position because both participants are receiving pleasure, and what's more is that pleasure is given orally, which is objectively the best kind.
But to you? It's just a "funny sex number". Grow up.
But to you? It's just a "funny sex number". Grow up.
November 10, 2025 at 12:07 PM
To me, 69 is the ultimate sex position because both participants are receiving pleasure, and what's more is that pleasure is given orally, which is objectively the best kind.
But to you? It's just a "funny sex number". Grow up.
But to you? It's just a "funny sex number". Grow up.
Reposted by "Mr. Goals"
man i'm actually glad my friend stefan took down this bastards app
November 7, 2025 at 1:49 PM
man i'm actually glad my friend stefan took down this bastards app
Reposted by "Mr. Goals"
I bet English people call their father something CRAZY. probably Mister Parent
October 30, 2025 at 8:16 AM
I bet English people call their father something CRAZY. probably Mister Parent
I bet English people call their father something CRAZY. probably Mister Parent
October 30, 2025 at 8:16 AM
I bet English people call their father something CRAZY. probably Mister Parent
Reposted by "Mr. Goals"
October 28, 2025 at 4:36 PM
Reposted by "Mr. Goals"
On March 22nd, 2023, Joseph Hernandez - better known as Joey from “Joey’s World Tour” - announced that he would soon be releasing his most important food review video yet: a mysterious item known only as “The Colossus.” It is now February 23rd, 2024, and Joey has not yet released the Colossus video.
February 23, 2024 at 9:00 PM
On March 22nd, 2023, Joseph Hernandez - better known as Joey from “Joey’s World Tour” - announced that he would soon be releasing his most important food review video yet: a mysterious item known only as “The Colossus.” It is now February 23rd, 2024, and Joey has not yet released the Colossus video.
Reposted by "Mr. Goals"
🎶 You say BJ
I say blowjay
You say give brain
I say get dome
Sloppy, toppy
Slurpin, salami
Let’s suck each other off
I say blowjay
You say give brain
I say get dome
Sloppy, toppy
Slurpin, salami
Let’s suck each other off
March 21, 2025 at 3:14 PM
🎶 You say BJ
I say blowjay
You say give brain
I say get dome
Sloppy, toppy
Slurpin, salami
Let’s suck each other off
I say blowjay
You say give brain
I say get dome
Sloppy, toppy
Slurpin, salami
Let’s suck each other off
when the poop comes OUT of the butt >>>>>
October 22, 2025 at 9:29 AM
when the poop comes OUT of the butt >>>>>
Reposted by "Mr. Goals"
It’s essentially an emergency that you see One Battle After Another in the cinema immediately. Sean Penn will win an Oscar & it has the best car chase in many years. And those aren’t in the top 3 best things about the film. Jesus shitting Christ.
October 12, 2025 at 7:07 PM
It’s essentially an emergency that you see One Battle After Another in the cinema immediately. Sean Penn will win an Oscar & it has the best car chase in many years. And those aren’t in the top 3 best things about the film. Jesus shitting Christ.