im so tired of this bullshit. im done playing this capitalist game of survival because I'm fucking losing. id rather just die now in bed than in the streets with nowhere to go

Someone do me in like that insurance CEO.

I'm such a failure of a person I can't even off myself correctly.

I have no friends anymore. No one I can reach out to. It's just me. I don't even have my fucking dog anymore. What's left for me here? Nothing. But I'm too much of a coward to fucking eat lead

It feels like I've lost everyone that ever mattered to me. They've moved on and left me behind. Why shouldn't I do the same? Who's gonna stop me? There's no one left who cares.

I can't even keep myself from posting my woes on here. Like it'll make a difference. No one cares. And I'm just doing it to see if anyone cares. But I already know the answer to that

I'm so tempted to try again. Just with a bigger dose. Maybe it would work then.

Is it too much to ask people to care about me and think of me when I'm not actively in crisis?

I'm tired of feeling like an afterthought to everyone. I just exist tangentially to their circles, never to fully be a part.

I'm just gonna stop posting and interacting with people on my main. No one fucking cares and no one would notice if I just dropped off the face of the earth.

It fucking sucks that I feel like Im closer to people than they feel they are to me. Like, I get attached to the people I like very deeply and quickly. But everyone is different and I need to remember that. It still fucking hurts.

I'm such a worthless shit. All I want to do is talk to my friends about everything going on but I don't want to put that much heavy shit on them or trigger them either. And so here I am screaming into the void, looking for attention like the whore I am.

I made a throwaway account because I needed to get this off my chest before I explode.
Tw: suicide attempt