Matt Eason
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Matt Eason
@matteason.me
540 followers 170 following 1.5K posts
Designer & developer working in digital government

ambiph.one / govukvue.org / matteason.co.uk/scotbeats / stationlifts.org.uk

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matteason.me
Matt Eason @matteason.me · Nov 12
Hi BSky, here are three things I made that you might like

Thing #1: Ambient ScotRail Beats

ScotRail made all of their tannoy announcements available under FOI and I put them over an infinite stream of ambient lofi beats. You can add your own music too
Ambient ScotRail Beats - train announcements over ambient music
Train announcements over ambient music
matteason.co.uk
matteason.me
Congratulations to everyone in Sainsbury's whose first day on Earth is today! You'll get there champ!
December 22, 2025 at 2:13 PM
matteason.me
CHEESE CRIME HOTLINE
Security sticker on a pack of Co Op cheddar reads "This product is security tagged. Thank you for buying at Southern Co-op. If found for resale elsewhere call 01202 059734 or email info@uk-pac.com"
December 21, 2025 at 4:15 PM
matteason.me
Free therapy from the ticket machine
"Change is possible" message on car park ticket machine
December 19, 2025 at 8:36 PM
matteason.me
I don't like rejections like this - "It’s about something that the UK Government or Parliament is not directly responsible for"

Why wouldn't parliament be able to legislate on volume levels for adverts and enforce via Ofcom/ASA? There are plenty of other regulations in place around advertising
December 17, 2025 at 12:20 PM
matteason.me
Just filled in my tax return and every single one of these issues I found last year is still broken. Self Assessment is such a mess
matteason.me Matt Eason @matteason.me · Dec 21
Join me as I nitpick how janky HMRC's self assessment service is while I suffer through completing my tax return

This warning text should be vertically aligned with the exclaimation mark icon
Warning text says 'Optional' indicates that completion is voluntary. It's next to a white exclaimation mark in a black circle, but they're not vertically aligned
December 16, 2025 at 1:20 PM
matteason.me
Fun, my first legal threat!

Network Rail have taken offense so my version of the Rail Clock will be coming down later today
OFFICIAL-SENSITIVE-COMMERCIAL OFFICIAL-SENSITIVE-COMMERCIAL It has come to Network Rail's attention that you are using a design ("Infringing Design") which substantially reproduces the Clock Design without Network Rail's permission. The Infringing Design is displayed at https://railclock.matteason.co.uk/ as per the below image: The reproduction of the Clock Design without Network Rail's consent amounts to the infringement of its copyright in the Clock Design pursuant to section 16 of the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988. Network Rail appreciates that you may not have been aware of its rights in the Clock Design, but, particularly in light of its importance to Network Rail's branding and history, it does not allow its unauthorised use. By making the source code for the design available, you are assisting others to create their own infringing versions of the Clock Design. This has the potential to cause significant damage to Network Rail and may amount to authorisation of infringing activities by third parties. In order to resolve this matter, Network Rail requests that you remove the Infringing Design and related source code from https://railclock.matteason.co.uk/ (and any other websites where it is displayed) and confirm in writing within 14 days of the date of this letter you have done do, by sending an email to redacted
December 12, 2025 at 9:17 AM
matteason.me
Lukewarm take: Using the flag for this is fine, actually, and we need to do everything we can to reclaim it from the lamppost wankers anyway
todaysrailwaysuk.bsky.social Today's Railways UK @todaysrailwaysuk.bsky.social · 20d
Tomorrow the new blue, red & white GBR livery & brand will be launched. The new design will be displayed on digital displays at a number of major stations. The DfT says the livery will appear across already publicly owned train operators from spring 2026, with the roll-out being gradual. 📷DfT
December 10, 2025 at 8:59 AM
matteason.me
I propose Whampocalypse, where you lose if you even _think_ about Last Christmas. This is Whamageddon with the gloves off.
December 9, 2025 at 4:04 PM
matteason.me
The judge reading Joey Barton's sentence should be a voice actor
December 8, 2025 at 11:45 AM
matteason.me
This isn't new and it's a colossal failure of leadership in the DVSA that it remains a problem

www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...
Driving test touts offer instructors £250 monthly kickbacks
Touts use instructor login details to bulk-book tests and sell them at a huge mark-up, the BBC finds.
www.bbc.co.uk
December 6, 2025 at 4:12 PM
matteason.me
American/Canadian/Australian/New Zealand Taskmaster fans! Last chance to order these Christmas tasks is this weekend! Last posting dates are looming

pixelgrabber.etsy.com/uk/listing/1...
matteason.me Matt Eason @matteason.me · Nov 5
I've just added these Christmas Taskmaster tasks to my Etsy shop if you'd like to make someone's Christmas significantly more high-pressure

pixelgrabber.etsy.com/uk/listing/4...
A Taskmaster-style task on folded card reads 'Have the merriest Christmas. You must exclaim "I'm so very merry!" with increasing enthusiasm every time you feel merry. You have until New Year's Day. Merriest Christmas wins. Your time stars now." A red keyring in the style of a wax seal with the initials GD in a typewriter-esque font, sealing a white folded task card
December 6, 2025 at 11:30 AM
matteason.me
Pleased to say this has now been fixed, 5 months after I reported it: www.gov.uk/government/p...
December 4, 2025 at 7:52 AM
matteason.me
How do I kill this fucking banana
Button in Google Slides reads 'Beautify this slide', with an icon of a banana because Google's image AI is called Nano Banana because they're so quirky and random
December 3, 2025 at 2:30 PM
matteason.me
Stacks of Taskmaster keyrings and Christmas tasks going out today!

If you already have the official advent calendar this would be a lovely way to round it off on Christmas day...

pixelgrabber.etsy.com/uk/listing/1...
A pile of red wax seal keyrings with various initials on
December 1, 2025 at 6:39 PM
matteason.me
"You wouldn't steal a car" antipiracy meme replaced with "You wouldn't visit a URL"
December 1, 2025 at 5:40 PM
matteason.me
pagescms.org is great - I haven't used it before and used it today to add a CMS to an existing @nuxt.com Content site (with multiple collections, media libraries, frontmatter schemas etc) in under a morning. Just flexible enough without being overwhelmingly complicated
Pages CMS: The No-Hassle CMS for Static Sites Generators
Tired of juggling Git and YAML to update your Next.js, Astro, Hugo or Nuxt website? Make it easy on you and your team, get a user-friendly CMS running straight on top of GitHub.
pagescms.org
December 1, 2025 at 4:57 PM
matteason.me
Why has Gmail just randomly asked to be able to see devices on my network..?
Chrome dialog reads "mail.google.com wants to look for and connect to any device on your local network". Allow and Block buttons
November 28, 2025 at 11:21 AM
matteason.me
OBR frantically googling "how to delete file from someone else's computer" this morning
direthoughts.com Henry Dyer @direthoughts.com · Nov 26
OBR_Economic_and_fiscal_outlook_November_2025_FINAL_FINAL_V9_DONOTPUBLISH_EMBARGO_USETHISONE.pdf
November 26, 2025 at 4:37 PM
matteason.me
Mandatory Remembrancing
November 26, 2025 at 1:47 PM
matteason.me
Absolutely fuck off Amazon
A WhatsApp message from Amazon advertising "door buster deals" and telling me to reply stop to unsubscribe
November 24, 2025 at 6:48 PM
matteason.me
I promise I'll stop pushing these soon but time is fairly of the essence. Great Secret Santa gift too especially if you, say, work on Taskmaster
matteason.me Matt Eason @matteason.me · Nov 5
I've just added these Christmas Taskmaster tasks to my Etsy shop if you'd like to make someone's Christmas significantly more high-pressure

pixelgrabber.etsy.com/uk/listing/4...
A Taskmaster-style task on folded card reads 'Have the merriest Christmas. You must exclaim "I'm so very merry!" with increasing enthusiasm every time you feel merry. You have until New Year's Day. Merriest Christmas wins. Your time stars now." A red keyring in the style of a wax seal with the initials GD in a typewriter-esque font, sealing a white folded task card
November 22, 2025 at 12:51 PM
matteason.me
Whyyyy would they post this
sconner.net Shaun Conner @sconner.net · Nov 19
If these weren’t bad enough, I found this one. This is real, by the way.
APOLOGY STATEMENT We would like to address some matters brought to our attention. It appears that our efforts to give every child the best start in life have had some unexpected consequences. Our Best Start Free Breakfast Clubs have served over 2.6 million meals, creating unforeseen levels of concentration in our classrooms and have left parents facing alarming amounts of unexpected free time at the start of the day. 30 hours of government-funded childcare have saved parents £7500 per child per year, triggering an outrageous increase in household savings and putting a shocking new focus on the importance of school readiness. With our drive to tackle school absence getting 140,000 children back in class and thousands more teachers recruited into our schools, our classrooms have become bustling hubs of learning, teeming with ambitious young people set to achieve and thrive with the help of this government. We put this down to our Plan for Change, which it seems has raised the bar alarmingly high. It turns out that when you have a mission to break down the barriers to opportunity, you end up making working people's lives better. We completely understand the urge to find out more - go to the Education Hub or beststartinlife.gov.uk. Department for Education Social Media Team
November 19, 2025 at 9:20 PM
Reposted by Matt Eason
ambiph.one
Issues at Cloudflare are causing slow loading and other problems on ambiph.one. Sorry if you're affected!
November 18, 2025 at 11:48 AM
matteason.me
Taskmaster Christmas orders are starting to come in thick and fast so I made a keyring designer to speed them up 💌
November 16, 2025 at 9:45 AM