I just want some cheese and quiet
February 19, 2026 at 2:18 AM
I just want some cheese and quiet
laying in bed with the nervous system of someone going to war
February 19, 2026 at 1:39 AM
laying in bed with the nervous system of someone going to war
"your package is out for delivery" ok where because i'll meet them halfway
February 19, 2026 at 12:58 AM
"your package is out for delivery" ok where because i'll meet them halfway
AirBnB is hilarious because imagine paying to travel somewhere and then sitting down to read the host's little list of rules like you're on an episode of WifeSwap.
February 18, 2026 at 3:14 AM
AirBnB is hilarious because imagine paying to travel somewhere and then sitting down to read the host's little list of rules like you're on an episode of WifeSwap.
I hate when ppl email back too quickly. i just ticked that off my todo list, now i gotta add this to the list again
February 18, 2026 at 1:50 AM
I hate when ppl email back too quickly. i just ticked that off my todo list, now i gotta add this to the list again
The best reading experience is finding a sentence so good you have to close the book and stare at the wall for a minute
February 17, 2026 at 2:34 AM
The best reading experience is finding a sentence so good you have to close the book and stare at the wall for a minute
ADHD be like: I didn't forget, I remembered 20 times... just not at the right time.
February 17, 2026 at 2:07 AM
ADHD be like: I didn't forget, I remembered 20 times... just not at the right time.
The absolute most devastating mistake you can make whilst doing chores is to sit down for that brief 3-500 minute break.
February 17, 2026 at 1:39 AM
The absolute most devastating mistake you can make whilst doing chores is to sit down for that brief 3-500 minute break.
slowly putting my airpods in one at a time in the mirror like they were my great great grandmother's earrings
February 16, 2026 at 4:06 AM
slowly putting my airpods in one at a time in the mirror like they were my great great grandmother's earrings
I can walk an hour and a half outside and not think anything of it, but 30 minutes on the treadmill feels like forever.
February 16, 2026 at 2:48 AM
I can walk an hour and a half outside and not think anything of it, but 30 minutes on the treadmill feels like forever.
The sooner you accept that it's going to take longer than you want, the sooner it happens faster than you expect.
February 16, 2026 at 1:37 AM
The sooner you accept that it's going to take longer than you want, the sooner it happens faster than you expect.
Nothing beats the feeling of coming home and seeing your dog lose their mind because you exist.
February 15, 2026 at 3:02 AM
Nothing beats the feeling of coming home and seeing your dog lose their mind because you exist.
What's an addiction no one talks about but is super common?
February 15, 2026 at 2:24 AM
What's an addiction no one talks about but is super common?
It's ok to not have a Valentine on Valentine's Day. I didn't have a groundhog on Groundhog's Day
February 14, 2026 at 11:28 PM
It's ok to not have a Valentine on Valentine's Day. I didn't have a groundhog on Groundhog's Day
Me at home: tired, overwhelmed.
Me on vacation: 20,000 steps a day, 4 hours of sleep, thriving.
Me on vacation: 20,000 steps a day, 4 hours of sleep, thriving.
February 14, 2026 at 4:10 AM
Me at home: tired, overwhelmed.
Me on vacation: 20,000 steps a day, 4 hours of sleep, thriving.
Me on vacation: 20,000 steps a day, 4 hours of sleep, thriving.
I hate when I open the fridge and see food that requires effort.
February 14, 2026 at 3:41 AM
I hate when I open the fridge and see food that requires effort.
booking flights on a phone is crazy, that is laptop activity
February 14, 2026 at 12:33 AM
booking flights on a phone is crazy, that is laptop activity
An air fryer is a mature easy bake oven.
February 13, 2026 at 5:20 AM
An air fryer is a mature easy bake oven.
I wish people had trailers
February 13, 2026 at 4:50 AM
I wish people had trailers
USPS tracking:
Step 1: we don't think it exists
Step 2: delivered
Step 1: we don't think it exists
Step 2: delivered
February 13, 2026 at 4:21 AM
USPS tracking:
Step 1: we don't think it exists
Step 2: delivered
Step 1: we don't think it exists
Step 2: delivered
On February 14th i will post "i miss us" comments on every couple photo i see.
February 12, 2026 at 4:04 AM
On February 14th i will post "i miss us" comments on every couple photo i see.
"How lazy are you?"
Sometimes I'm quiet because I feel too lazy to move my lips
Sometimes I'm quiet because I feel too lazy to move my lips
February 12, 2026 at 3:07 AM
"How lazy are you?"
Sometimes I'm quiet because I feel too lazy to move my lips
Sometimes I'm quiet because I feel too lazy to move my lips
Time for bed, but first, let me figure out everything real quick
February 12, 2026 at 1:20 AM
Time for bed, but first, let me figure out everything real quick
Going off grid for awhile (leaving my phone in another room while it charges)
February 12, 2026 at 12:55 AM
Going off grid for awhile (leaving my phone in another room while it charges)
Humans were not meant to have this many passwords
February 11, 2026 at 5:33 PM
Humans were not meant to have this many passwords