Hazel
@hazelazureus.bsky.social
Sole Apostle of the Laughing Weaver.
Eyepatches are itchy. I'm a cajun scot with terminal cancer and multiple sclerosis. 35. He/Him, Poly, Bi, Married, ENM, Many Cats, Masters in Biology, retired nurse and Feline Sanctuary operator.
Eyepatches are itchy. I'm a cajun scot with terminal cancer and multiple sclerosis. 35. He/Him, Poly, Bi, Married, ENM, Many Cats, Masters in Biology, retired nurse and Feline Sanctuary operator.
my itch to make ball of gnaise finally got the better of me at 3 AM(this is it as of 2 hours ago, still simmering it now tho, mine's usually a 4-5 hour sauce)
November 10, 2025 at 12:10 PM
my itch to make ball of gnaise finally got the better of me at 3 AM(this is it as of 2 hours ago, still simmering it now tho, mine's usually a 4-5 hour sauce)
these carrots are iffy i am unsure if i want an iffy carrot bolognese
November 10, 2025 at 2:07 AM
these carrots are iffy i am unsure if i want an iffy carrot bolognese
treatment at 9 AM, zero energy, probably ailing in some fashion...
why do I have the itch to make a fucking bolognese again
why do I have the itch to make a fucking bolognese again
November 10, 2025 at 1:23 AM
treatment at 9 AM, zero energy, probably ailing in some fashion...
why do I have the itch to make a fucking bolognese again
why do I have the itch to make a fucking bolognese again
cloud of protein powder in my good eye
this is not approved consumption of macros
this is not approved consumption of macros
November 9, 2025 at 12:43 PM
cloud of protein powder in my good eye
this is not approved consumption of macros
this is not approved consumption of macros
now we get to listen to another 4 years of stolen election conspiracy theories
November 5, 2025 at 3:27 AM
now we get to listen to another 4 years of stolen election conspiracy theories
1 AM cacio e pepe turned out better than usual
October 31, 2025 at 5:19 AM
1 AM cacio e pepe turned out better than usual
i need more people to understand that none of this would be happening if golf didn't exist
that's it, that's literally the one thing you could remove from human society to prevent any of this
that's it, that's literally the one thing you could remove from human society to prevent any of this
October 25, 2025 at 8:18 PM
i need more people to understand that none of this would be happening if golf didn't exist
that's it, that's literally the one thing you could remove from human society to prevent any of this
that's it, that's literally the one thing you could remove from human society to prevent any of this
if you prefer smooth pureed sauces/soups to chunky sauces where there's a lot of textures and visible vegetables etc we can't be friends
October 25, 2025 at 4:09 PM
if you prefer smooth pureed sauces/soups to chunky sauces where there's a lot of textures and visible vegetables etc we can't be friends
@kaiserneko.bsky.social @lanipator.bsky.social bento super when
October 22, 2025 at 11:54 AM
@kaiserneko.bsky.social @lanipator.bsky.social bento super when
made potato and leek soup and added a good amount of smoked paprika to it because fuck herbs de provence purists
it was like a loaded baked potato and leek soup
it rules
it was like a loaded baked potato and leek soup
it rules
October 9, 2025 at 2:10 AM
made potato and leek soup and added a good amount of smoked paprika to it because fuck herbs de provence purists
it was like a loaded baked potato and leek soup
it rules
it was like a loaded baked potato and leek soup
it rules
listening to Creed at max volume while passing a kidney stone on a monday counts as attending Mass, don't @ me
October 6, 2025 at 3:54 PM
listening to Creed at max volume while passing a kidney stone on a monday counts as attending Mass, don't @ me
why does mundian to bach ke play on aggressive loop in my head every time i eat spicy pickled celery
there's not even a tertiary link between these things, thematically or flavorfully
there's not even a tertiary link between these things, thematically or flavorfully
October 5, 2025 at 3:52 PM
why does mundian to bach ke play on aggressive loop in my head every time i eat spicy pickled celery
there's not even a tertiary link between these things, thematically or flavorfully
there's not even a tertiary link between these things, thematically or flavorfully
rly hate when i'm trying to rest but my brain keeps queefing out new recipes to try later in the week that i know i'll forget about
October 5, 2025 at 8:53 AM
rly hate when i'm trying to rest but my brain keeps queefing out new recipes to try later in the week that i know i'll forget about
taking a look through my call logs and I've received 715 spam phonecalls since january 2025
for the entirety of 2024 that number was 113
2023 was 70
2022 was 8
for the entirety of 2024 that number was 113
2023 was 70
2022 was 8
October 4, 2025 at 1:51 PM
taking a look through my call logs and I've received 715 spam phonecalls since january 2025
for the entirety of 2024 that number was 113
2023 was 70
2022 was 8
for the entirety of 2024 that number was 113
2023 was 70
2022 was 8
guess who poured seltzer on his protein powder because he wasn't fully awake and witnessed a spill that will leave a smell for an entire week
October 4, 2025 at 11:38 AM
guess who poured seltzer on his protein powder because he wasn't fully awake and witnessed a spill that will leave a smell for an entire week
new record, 8 eggs rolled into one tamagoyaki without the omelette discoloring at all
literally 8 dollars worth of omelette cooked perfectly and rolled up tight, wider than my fist
i feel vaguely sick after eating it but that's just weakness leaving the body
literally 8 dollars worth of omelette cooked perfectly and rolled up tight, wider than my fist
i feel vaguely sick after eating it but that's just weakness leaving the body
September 29, 2025 at 9:28 AM
new record, 8 eggs rolled into one tamagoyaki without the omelette discoloring at all
literally 8 dollars worth of omelette cooked perfectly and rolled up tight, wider than my fist
i feel vaguely sick after eating it but that's just weakness leaving the body
literally 8 dollars worth of omelette cooked perfectly and rolled up tight, wider than my fist
i feel vaguely sick after eating it but that's just weakness leaving the body
making a dense vegetable soup and my cats are all approaching me and expressing deep offense at the celery and onion juices on me and it's like damn
September 28, 2025 at 2:14 AM
making a dense vegetable soup and my cats are all approaching me and expressing deep offense at the celery and onion juices on me and it's like damn
my tamagoyaki pan and my le creusset dutch oven are the foundational pillars of my soul
September 25, 2025 at 1:31 AM
my tamagoyaki pan and my le creusset dutch oven are the foundational pillars of my soul
Hm. I think too many people make it deep into adulthood without feeling their blood in their ears. Like, having a confrontation that is clearly escalating, and learning how to defuse it - but also, how to not dwell on the moment for weeks afterward.
September 20, 2025 at 6:23 PM
Hm. I think too many people make it deep into adulthood without feeling their blood in their ears. Like, having a confrontation that is clearly escalating, and learning how to defuse it - but also, how to not dwell on the moment for weeks afterward.
@haruspex.bsky.social @rahaeli.bsky.social
closure for those I roped in to my boring egg misfortune: got new eggs(12 dollars for 18 my fucking life in shambles) from a different store and they're fine but I spent 10 minutes sniffing them
protein secured, trust damaged forever
closure for those I roped in to my boring egg misfortune: got new eggs(12 dollars for 18 my fucking life in shambles) from a different store and they're fine but I spent 10 minutes sniffing them
protein secured, trust damaged forever
September 15, 2025 at 4:08 PM
@haruspex.bsky.social @rahaeli.bsky.social
closure for those I roped in to my boring egg misfortune: got new eggs(12 dollars for 18 my fucking life in shambles) from a different store and they're fine but I spent 10 minutes sniffing them
protein secured, trust damaged forever
closure for those I roped in to my boring egg misfortune: got new eggs(12 dollars for 18 my fucking life in shambles) from a different store and they're fine but I spent 10 minutes sniffing them
protein secured, trust damaged forever
@rahaeli.bsky.social need help with something
went to make breakfast and cracked an egg, got hit with a STRONG smell of wet dog. two more eggs, same thing.
been eating hundreds of eggs a year for 20+ years, this is brand new
che cosa facendo
went to make breakfast and cracked an egg, got hit with a STRONG smell of wet dog. two more eggs, same thing.
been eating hundreds of eggs a year for 20+ years, this is brand new
che cosa facendo
September 14, 2025 at 5:40 PM
@rahaeli.bsky.social need help with something
went to make breakfast and cracked an egg, got hit with a STRONG smell of wet dog. two more eggs, same thing.
been eating hundreds of eggs a year for 20+ years, this is brand new
che cosa facendo
went to make breakfast and cracked an egg, got hit with a STRONG smell of wet dog. two more eggs, same thing.
been eating hundreds of eggs a year for 20+ years, this is brand new
che cosa facendo
anyone else hear that chittering
the weaving never stops
the weaving never stops
September 11, 2025 at 1:59 PM
anyone else hear that chittering
the weaving never stops
the weaving never stops
@nessguerrero.bsky.social you should get a bunch of those telepresence robots from the tiktoks so your friends can bother your cat while you're out and about
September 9, 2025 at 5:04 PM
@nessguerrero.bsky.social you should get a bunch of those telepresence robots from the tiktoks so your friends can bother your cat while you're out and about
it's neat how we have Super Saiyan Andrew Wakefield running our country's health services now
very exciting times
very exciting times
September 6, 2025 at 5:27 AM
it's neat how we have Super Saiyan Andrew Wakefield running our country's health services now
very exciting times
very exciting times