Hannah Murray
@hannahmwrites.bsky.social
Author, pervert, former sex worker, data nerd. I write sexy books, can ignore bad news until it’s irrelevant, and I know how to tie you up. Bi/pan, cis, she/her
Pinned
My birthday is this weekend and I said I didn’t need anything but then I decided I needed cheese so my husband and best friend and I went to Camas Cheese tonight and they brought me approximately $100 worth of deliciousness and so 52 is officially The Cheese Birthday, make a note.
November 15, 2025 at 3:20 AM
My birthday is this weekend and I said I didn’t need anything but then I decided I needed cheese so my husband and best friend and I went to Camas Cheese tonight and they brought me approximately $100 worth of deliciousness and so 52 is officially The Cheese Birthday, make a note.
I’m waiting for my laundry to be dry so I can wear pants to therapy, because I feel showing up pantsless will give the wrong impression about the current state of my mental health.
November 14, 2025 at 8:14 PM
I’m waiting for my laundry to be dry so I can wear pants to therapy, because I feel showing up pantsless will give the wrong impression about the current state of my mental health.
Donnez-moi une fucking break.
I’ll say this much: This reads exactly like what it is: people who discovered romance five years ago and decided they had all kinds of amazing new ideas to “fix” it. Connections between books? That feel kind of cozy to the reader? How did no one ever think of that?? www.nytimes.com/2025/11/13/b...
November 14, 2025 at 3:40 PM
Donnez-moi une fucking break.
There are these videos on instagram of people cutting into realistic cat cakes in front of their real cats just to see how their real cats react to them BUTCHERING A CAT and A) these people suck and B) their cats attack them and frankly it’s less than they deserve.
November 14, 2025 at 3:44 AM
There are these videos on instagram of people cutting into realistic cat cakes in front of their real cats just to see how their real cats react to them BUTCHERING A CAT and A) these people suck and B) their cats attack them and frankly it’s less than they deserve.
It really is.
mariska hargitay’s documentary on her mother, jayne mansfield, is phenomenal
November 14, 2025 at 2:17 AM
It really is.
Reposted by Hannah Murray
The union is asking that you not patronize any Starbucks, even ones that aren't unionized, for the duration! Time to find your new favoriteocal coffee shop. To donate to their strike fund: sbworkersunited.org
November 13, 2025 at 8:16 PM
The union is asking that you not patronize any Starbucks, even ones that aren't unionized, for the duration! Time to find your new favoriteocal coffee shop. To donate to their strike fund: sbworkersunited.org
fucking duh
my god he had him killed didn’t he
November 13, 2025 at 8:10 PM
fucking duh
First: 15 is not 'barely legal'. Barely legal is 18, and it's a porn term. It does NOT belong in a discussion of the sexual assault/exploitation of children, and a 15 year old is a child by any metric.
Second: fuck Megyn Kelly and anyone else trying to find a way to make any of this more palatable.
Second: fuck Megyn Kelly and anyone else trying to find a way to make any of this more palatable.
November 13, 2025 at 7:49 PM
First: 15 is not 'barely legal'. Barely legal is 18, and it's a porn term. It does NOT belong in a discussion of the sexual assault/exploitation of children, and a 15 year old is a child by any metric.
Second: fuck Megyn Kelly and anyone else trying to find a way to make any of this more palatable.
Second: fuck Megyn Kelly and anyone else trying to find a way to make any of this more palatable.
Reposted by Hannah Murray
Since The F.I.L.T.H. Ever Afters comes out on 11/25, I thought I'd put the rest of the series up for sale. 99 cents each through Nov 30!
www.amazon.com/dp/B0BJSC1DH...
www.amazon.com/dp/B0BJSC1DH...
November 3, 2025 at 7:57 PM
Since The F.I.L.T.H. Ever Afters comes out on 11/25, I thought I'd put the rest of the series up for sale. 99 cents each through Nov 30!
www.amazon.com/dp/B0BJSC1DH...
www.amazon.com/dp/B0BJSC1DH...
Got woken up in the middle of the night to sirens and cops on a bullhorn in the neighborhood. No idea what was going on, but my security focused, on alert at all times husband slept through it all.
November 13, 2025 at 4:18 PM
Got woken up in the middle of the night to sirens and cops on a bullhorn in the neighborhood. No idea what was going on, but my security focused, on alert at all times husband slept through it all.
My husband had a thing so I’m keeping his portion of the soup dumplings warm for him instead of just eating them all and telling him there weren’t enough for two and if that isn’t a fucking act of love I don’t know what is.
November 13, 2025 at 3:11 AM
My husband had a thing so I’m keeping his portion of the soup dumplings warm for him instead of just eating them all and telling him there weren’t enough for two and if that isn’t a fucking act of love I don’t know what is.
My mom keeps crowing about what she got me for my birthday and I already know what it is from my sister and all I can say is I wish she'd just buy me a bag of soup dumplings from Costco.
November 12, 2025 at 10:52 PM
My mom keeps crowing about what she got me for my birthday and I already know what it is from my sister and all I can say is I wish she'd just buy me a bag of soup dumplings from Costco.
That's goddamn right.
Teenager on train: I'm not a feminist.
Mum: Do you want to own things and decide who you sleep with?
Teen: Yeah.
Mum: You're a feminist.
Mum: Do you want to own things and decide who you sleep with?
Teen: Yeah.
Mum: You're a feminist.
November 12, 2025 at 10:02 PM
That's goddamn right.
"Condensed soup is better than homemade roux and sauce" is THE whitest most midwestern fucking thing I've ever read in my life and the shame of it cannot be overstated. I need whoever said this to go hide in a hole for the rest of their lives.
Someone shares a delicious take on green bean casserole...
White people in the comments:
"Too much seasoning. All you need is salt and pepper."
"It should be drier than that."
"Why are you adding mushrooms & bacon?"
"Condensed soup is better than homemade roux and sauce."
🗣 STOP EMBARRASSING US
White people in the comments:
"Too much seasoning. All you need is salt and pepper."
"It should be drier than that."
"Why are you adding mushrooms & bacon?"
"Condensed soup is better than homemade roux and sauce."
🗣 STOP EMBARRASSING US
November 11, 2025 at 8:21 PM
"Condensed soup is better than homemade roux and sauce" is THE whitest most midwestern fucking thing I've ever read in my life and the shame of it cannot be overstated. I need whoever said this to go hide in a hole for the rest of their lives.
I love the dictionary.
‘Nickname’ is not ‘nick’ + ‘name.’
It was originally ‘ekename.’
‘Eke’ was the Middle English word for “also” or “in addition.”
Since ‘ekename’ began with a vowel, people used ‘an’ before it.
Over time, 'an ekename' became 'a nickname.'
It was originally ‘ekename.’
‘Eke’ was the Middle English word for “also” or “in addition.”
Since ‘ekename’ began with a vowel, people used ‘an’ before it.
Over time, 'an ekename' became 'a nickname.'
November 11, 2025 at 7:53 PM
I love the dictionary.
Current dilemma: do I buy myself a tablet/e-reader I can read on while my kid uses my phone, or do I buy my kid her own phone?
Pros and cons to each. Eventually the kid will require a phone, so the e-reader would be a stop-gap. But putting off the phone for as long as possible isn't a bad idea.
Pros and cons to each. Eventually the kid will require a phone, so the e-reader would be a stop-gap. But putting off the phone for as long as possible isn't a bad idea.
November 11, 2025 at 7:51 PM
Current dilemma: do I buy myself a tablet/e-reader I can read on while my kid uses my phone, or do I buy my kid her own phone?
Pros and cons to each. Eventually the kid will require a phone, so the e-reader would be a stop-gap. But putting off the phone for as long as possible isn't a bad idea.
Pros and cons to each. Eventually the kid will require a phone, so the e-reader would be a stop-gap. But putting off the phone for as long as possible isn't a bad idea.
Back at the library, hours later than planned, because we ran out of butter and this was both a tragedy and an emergency. So an urgent Costco run was made, butter was acquired, and then I was allowed to proceed with my regularly scheduled day.
November 11, 2025 at 7:29 PM
Back at the library, hours later than planned, because we ran out of butter and this was both a tragedy and an emergency. So an urgent Costco run was made, butter was acquired, and then I was allowed to proceed with my regularly scheduled day.
He faked his death to live a normal life, they find out, refuse to let him live a normal life, boom he’s Bond again.
It’s not that hard.
It’s not that hard.
November 11, 2025 at 6:35 PM
He faked his death to live a normal life, they find out, refuse to let him live a normal life, boom he’s Bond again.
It’s not that hard.
It’s not that hard.
I got an astonishing amount of work done in a very short time at the library, it turns out that’s what happens when I minimize distractions. This is distressing news.
November 11, 2025 at 4:06 AM
I got an astonishing amount of work done in a very short time at the library, it turns out that’s what happens when I minimize distractions. This is distressing news.
Spotify keeps feeding me ads for this new legal drama staring Kim Kardashian and I could not be less interested.
November 10, 2025 at 10:03 PM
Spotify keeps feeding me ads for this new legal drama staring Kim Kardashian and I could not be less interested.
People who see drone shots and think "It's so beautiful, I want to be there" and I'm like "No, you don't. You really fucking don't."
You can always tell when folks who didn't grow up in nature are getting into a mystical nature kick because they talk about forests like they're these serene, perfect, peaceful places. No friend, nature is scary and tense as fuck and you're looking at a place where things live and die BY THE MINUTE.
November 10, 2025 at 9:19 PM
People who see drone shots and think "It's so beautiful, I want to be there" and I'm like "No, you don't. You really fucking don't."
Reposted by Hannah Murray
"The GOP promises to hold a vote to extend subsidies" is just "The Roadrunner has painted a tunnel on the side of this mountain" but in a different font.
November 10, 2025 at 12:55 AM
"The GOP promises to hold a vote to extend subsidies" is just "The Roadrunner has painted a tunnel on the side of this mountain" but in a different font.
I have taken myself to the library to work. The tables by the fireplace are all taken, so I'm parked by the big windows where the sunlight is bright and the turning leaves are waving outside, and although there's no dog and no cozy blanket, it's not half bad.
November 10, 2025 at 7:40 PM
I have taken myself to the library to work. The tables by the fireplace are all taken, so I'm parked by the big windows where the sunlight is bright and the turning leaves are waving outside, and although there's no dog and no cozy blanket, it's not half bad.
I finally snagged that sneaky hair out of my neck that’s been eluding me for like a week, and the satisfaction and triumph cannot be overstated.
November 10, 2025 at 3:50 PM
I finally snagged that sneaky hair out of my neck that’s been eluding me for like a week, and the satisfaction and triumph cannot be overstated.
Reposted by Hannah Murray
the thing that upsets me about this the most is that Dems had all the momentum, republicans were reeling, and we were getting intra-GOP fighting over the filibuster, all while voters were blaming republicans for their incompetence
this destroys all of this. just a total gut punch
this destroys all of this. just a total gut punch
November 10, 2025 at 5:06 AM
the thing that upsets me about this the most is that Dems had all the momentum, republicans were reeling, and we were getting intra-GOP fighting over the filibuster, all while voters were blaming republicans for their incompetence
this destroys all of this. just a total gut punch
this destroys all of this. just a total gut punch