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greenleejw.bsky.social
Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
@greenleejw.bsky.social
28K followers 330 following 8.3K posts
Surprised historian, not surprised eels.

Doctor of medieval things. Talkin’ eels, history, and maps. Spaniel mourner. Alt-text artist.

I draw custom maps and artwork on commission:
https://surprisedeelmaps.com/

Support me here: patreon.com/SurprisedEel
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greenleejw.bsky.social
Surprised Eel Historian, PhD @greenleejw.bsky.social · Nov 17
I draw custom maps on commission. Maps for books, games, decoration, etc. Here are a couple of examples. There are more on my website, along with a contact form and info about cost, process, etc.

If you need a map, I'm happy to help!

surprisedeelmaps.com
A black and white map showing a city plan for ancient Mycenae. A black and white map showing downtown NY, with small drawings of city landmarks in small snowglobes around the outside of the map. Each drawing is labeled with a number, and the map has corresponding numbers to show where the landmarks are located. A colored fantasy-style map of a land labeled "Examploria." A black and white map of medieval Iberia, focused on the Christian kingdoms in the northern part of the peninsula.
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
Sometimes when people come to me for a map, we start from scratch. But sometimes their publisher sent them b/c the map they want to use won't do, & I need to rework it.

This recent map of heavy metal concentrations in the soil of a village is a good example. Here's the original, & my reproduction:
Four versions of a map of a village in Europe showing levels of heavy metal concentration in the soil. There is one map each for lead, arsenic, lead, and silver. The maps are very full, showing elevation lines, property lines, rivers, houses, trees and more. The concentrations of heavy metals are designated by the darkness of small circles: lighter circles show lower levels, and darker circles show higher levels. A simplified version of the previous maps. This shows only two maps: one showing the concentrations of silver, the other showing the concentrations of lead. The roads, property lines and elevation lines remain, but much of the other information such as houses and trees has not been replicated. As before, the concentrations of heavy metals are designated by the darkness of small circles: lighter circles show lower levels, and darker circles show higher levels.
January 6, 2026 at 6:43 PM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
Yesterday, Jan. 5, was the medieval Feast of St. Edward the Confessor. I know you all celebrated accordingly.

But did you celebrate with eels, like Henry III?

The king was a big ol' St. Ed's fanboy, & each year he threw a huge party with lots of eels. 10,000 of them in 1251!
🗃️🧪
Meme. Medieval painting showing the crowning of Henry III. The king is seated on a throne, still and regal. There are two bishops on either side of him, setting the crown on his head. Henry's hair is elegantly wavy around his narrow face. His face is pointed straight ahead, but the pupils of his eyes are pointed upwards, presumably towards god. The way his beard is drawn makes is look like chin is melting. He's wearing a red shirt and blue cape, and is holding a model of a cathedral in his left hand. His demeanor and expression look very much like an Irish Setter ignoring a physics lecture. The bishops, in brown robes and mitres, each have a hand on the kings crown. They are, clearly, meant to be setting it on his head. But the scene is more interesting if we assume that they are trying to steal it. Think: Indiana Jones replacing an idol with a bag of sand. I hope they can outrun a boulder. Meme text reads: "The Confessor's my boy But eels are my joy"
January 6, 2026 at 4:52 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
Sometimes when people come to me for a map, we start from scratch. But sometimes their publisher sent them b/c the map they want to use won't do, & I need to rework it.

This recent map of heavy metal concentrations in the soil of a village is a good example. Here's the original, & my reproduction:
Four versions of a map of a village in Europe showing levels of heavy metal concentration in the soil. There is one map each for lead, arsenic, lead, and silver. The maps are very full, showing elevation lines, property lines, rivers, houses, trees and more. The concentrations of heavy metals are designated by the darkness of small circles: lighter circles show lower levels, and darker circles show higher levels. A simplified version of the previous maps. This shows only two maps: one showing the concentrations of silver, the other showing the concentrations of lead. The roads, property lines and elevation lines remain, but much of the other information such as houses and trees has not been replicated. As before, the concentrations of heavy metals are designated by the darkness of small circles: lighter circles show lower levels, and darker circles show higher levels.
January 6, 2026 at 6:43 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
Yesterday, Jan. 5, was the medieval Feast of St. Edward the Confessor. I know you all celebrated accordingly.

But did you celebrate with eels, like Henry III?

The king was a big ol' St. Ed's fanboy, & each year he threw a huge party with lots of eels. 10,000 of them in 1251!
🗃️🧪
Meme. Medieval painting showing the crowning of Henry III. The king is seated on a throne, still and regal. There are two bishops on either side of him, setting the crown on his head. Henry's hair is elegantly wavy around his narrow face. His face is pointed straight ahead, but the pupils of his eyes are pointed upwards, presumably towards god. The way his beard is drawn makes is look like chin is melting. He's wearing a red shirt and blue cape, and is holding a model of a cathedral in his left hand. His demeanor and expression look very much like an Irish Setter ignoring a physics lecture. The bishops, in brown robes and mitres, each have a hand on the kings crown. They are, clearly, meant to be setting it on his head. But the scene is more interesting if we assume that they are trying to steal it. Think: Indiana Jones replacing an idol with a bag of sand. I hope they can outrun a boulder. Meme text reads: "The Confessor's my boy But eels are my joy"
January 6, 2026 at 4:52 PM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
A drawing from this evening. Perhaps someone seen from behind, doing a victory dance after winning free cheese.
Art. Black and white ink pen drawing made of abstract shapes and lines.
January 6, 2026 at 4:11 AM
greenleejw.bsky.social
The answer the people demand, to the question that somebody asks every 6-8 months
greenleejw.bsky.social Surprised Eel Historian, PhD @greenleejw.bsky.social · 1d
Europeans didn't learn about electric eels until after they learned about electricity. There are electric catfish in the Nile, and they were called thunder fish.

Native S. American peoples called electric eels something that translates to: the fish that takes away movement.
January 6, 2026 at 5:01 AM
greenleejw.bsky.social
A drawing from this evening. Perhaps someone seen from behind, doing a victory dance after winning free cheese.
Art. Black and white ink pen drawing made of abstract shapes and lines.
January 6, 2026 at 4:11 AM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
Has anyone called you a "merchant of eel skin" lately? If so, you should take offense.

In premodern England, that was an insult. It meant you were a fraud: making promises you can't keep. Like a vendor trying to sell an eel but not having the meat. A living weasel word! 1/7
🗃️🧪
Meme. Still from the movie Top Gun, showing Stinger getting up in Maverick's face. His eyes are wide, piercing like a ballistic porcupine. His nose is angular, and you can *feel* it quivering like a race horse's flanks. The collar of his khaki uniform shirt spread out like blood eagles' wings, and his shaved head is slick with aggression and villainy. That, at least, is how it looks when you know the context of the movie and the scene. BUT...taken wholly out of context, Stinger's expression could be quite different. Suppose we assume that he is asking for help convincing a family member to seek help with an addiction? The expression retains it's intensity, but shifts away from the aggressive register we first see. Now, suddenly, he's sympathetic. That would be a very different movie. Meme text reads: "Your ego is writing checks for eels That your body can't cash"
January 5, 2026 at 4:53 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
One very good reason to cite yourself is that you may be the world expert on the thing, and the only person to have written much on the topic.

Like…if I want to cite somebody on Medieval English eel history, who am I going to turn to if not myself?
tlecaque.bsky.social Thomas Lecaque @tlecaque.bsky.social · 1d
I saw a LinkedIn post making fun of senior scholars for citing themselves, but I've seen academics Columbus entire well developed fields of study and be applauded for it by the AHA, so...?
January 5, 2026 at 8:53 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
Has anyone called you a "merchant of eel skin" lately? If so, you should take offense.

In premodern England, that was an insult. It meant you were a fraud: making promises you can't keep. Like a vendor trying to sell an eel but not having the meat. A living weasel word! 1/7
🗃️🧪
Meme. Still from the movie Top Gun, showing Stinger getting up in Maverick's face. His eyes are wide, piercing like a ballistic porcupine. His nose is angular, and you can *feel* it quivering like a race horse's flanks. The collar of his khaki uniform shirt spread out like blood eagles' wings, and his shaved head is slick with aggression and villainy. That, at least, is how it looks when you know the context of the movie and the scene. BUT...taken wholly out of context, Stinger's expression could be quite different. Suppose we assume that he is asking for help convincing a family member to seek help with an addiction? The expression retains it's intensity, but shifts away from the aggressive register we first see. Now, suddenly, he's sympathetic. That would be a very different movie. Meme text reads: "Your ego is writing checks for eels That your body can't cash"
January 5, 2026 at 4:53 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
Sometimes I get to a point with a drawing and realize that I have no idea what it is. And friends…I’m there.

What do you see in this?
Art. Black and white ink pen drawing made of abstract shapes and lines that could be the predator going for a stroll, or a lion fish escaping trouble, or part of a pig with a spartan helmet crest. Or something else altogether
January 5, 2026 at 4:06 AM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
A poem for this evening. Not a new one, but one I come back to, and something to remind myself of in the new year.
The first page of a poem titled: "Timelessness." The poem reads: We make a virtue out of worshiping a clock-faced god, living lives of tightly scheduled minutes as if each lateness were recorded in some great and doomful book, to be counted up and weighed against our hearts when all our days are done. As if Creation cared. There is nothing natural in the revolutions of a clock. No ethics in the rocking trap of the escapement. Nothing holy in the gears and springs that cut the world to seconds. We chose to treat these things as sacred, to make a Faith of punctuality and a Creed of “Don’t be late.” But this is not a healing rite. Punctuality is other people’s demands upon your soul. And it is not the only choice we are allowed. The deep world moves but slowly to the lingered dance of sun and moon, keeping time through an abiding whirl of stars that are for signs, and seasons, and days, and years. And we can take that measure for our own Against the ageless patience of the skies what worth are all our spring-wrought hours? Here, our careful liturgy of timeliness comes loose. Here, it does not matter if the seconds run away from us. Here, beneath this temple vault of heaven, is a morality of timelessness that begs of us to stay until we know enough, to travel at the speed of peace, and keep our faith with moments, not with minutes. An ethics of the time we owe ourselves so that, when all our hours have run dry and every substance of our days is judged, it can be said that our short stay here was well-lived, and not well-scheduled. - John Wyatt Greenlee
January 5, 2026 at 1:01 AM
greenleejw.bsky.social
A poem for this evening. Not a new one, but one I come back to, and something to remind myself of in the new year.
The first page of a poem titled: "Timelessness." The poem reads: We make a virtue out of worshiping a clock-faced god, living lives of tightly scheduled minutes as if each lateness were recorded in some great and doomful book, to be counted up and weighed against our hearts when all our days are done. As if Creation cared. There is nothing natural in the revolutions of a clock. No ethics in the rocking trap of the escapement. Nothing holy in the gears and springs that cut the world to seconds. We chose to treat these things as sacred, to make a Faith of punctuality and a Creed of “Don’t be late.” But this is not a healing rite. Punctuality is other people’s demands upon your soul. And it is not the only choice we are allowed. The deep world moves but slowly to the lingered dance of sun and moon, keeping time through an abiding whirl of stars that are for signs, and seasons, and days, and years. And we can take that measure for our own Against the ageless patience of the skies what worth are all our spring-wrought hours? Here, our careful liturgy of timeliness comes loose. Here, it does not matter if the seconds run away from us. Here, beneath this temple vault of heaven, is a morality of timelessness that begs of us to stay until we know enough, to travel at the speed of peace, and keep our faith with moments, not with minutes. An ethics of the time we owe ourselves so that, when all our hours have run dry and every substance of our days is judged, it can be said that our short stay here was well-lived, and not well-scheduled. - John Wyatt Greenlee
January 5, 2026 at 1:01 AM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
A drawing from this morning, sitting by the fire and listening to the wind.

Is it a weird gar? A platypus-shark? Who knows!
Art. Ink pen drawing made of abstract shapes and lines. It looks like a fish of some sort that has been swimming left-to-right but has curved back around. It’s fins are doing an odd swimming motion, and it’s snout looks long and flat and wide like a duck’s bill
January 4, 2026 at 6:51 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
A drawing from this morning, sitting by the fire and listening to the wind.

Is it a weird gar? A platypus-shark? Who knows!
Art. Ink pen drawing made of abstract shapes and lines. It looks like a fish of some sort that has been swimming left-to-right but has curved back around. It’s fins are doing an odd swimming motion, and it’s snout looks long and flat and wide like a duck’s bill
January 4, 2026 at 6:51 PM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
Roses are red
Plots sometimes thicken.
I think that I’ve drawn
A monstrous chicken.
Art. Black and white ink pen drawing made of abstract shapes and lines that looks kinda like a chicken with a long and serpentine neck
January 4, 2026 at 2:00 AM
greenleejw.bsky.social
Roses are red
Plots sometimes thicken.
I think that I’ve drawn
A monstrous chicken.
Art. Black and white ink pen drawing made of abstract shapes and lines that looks kinda like a chicken with a long and serpentine neck
January 4, 2026 at 2:00 AM
greenleejw.bsky.social
A drawing from last night and today. Sometimes i don’t know what I’ve drawn — I almost never have a goal when I start — but this one seemed clear to me from early on.

I see a tree by a river. Though if you flip it upside down it’s a deep-rooted lump.
Art. Black and white ink pen drawing made of abstract shapes and lines that looks like a barren, winter-scraped tree next to a river, with the beginnings of a reflection in the water
January 3, 2026 at 7:25 PM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
2026 is making an early start to a “Hold my beer, 2025.” play, and I don’t like it.
January 3, 2026 at 5:05 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
2026 is making an early start to a “Hold my beer, 2025.” play, and I don’t like it.
January 3, 2026 at 5:05 PM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
In January 1421 a small fleet of Dutch ships arrived in London. And did they bring the eels? Oh yeah.

One ship, belonging to Gerbrand Heykysson, unloaded 400 large eels, 2,700 medium eels, 23,00 small eels, & 6 barrels of salted eels.

Also a small sack of feathers.
🗃️🧪
Meme. Photograph of an American eel underwater, peeking out from some rocks. We'll call him Whumblorn. He looks skeptical about life in general, and about you specifically. His red eye is rimmed in blue, and he seems to be staring right through your chest, like he wants to read the funny thing on the back of your shirt by looking through you. Whumblorn's underneath is a beautiful silver color, and his top is a dull black. Don't judge, though. This seems natural for him, and he is perhaps wondering why your top and bottom are the same colors. You don't get to judge the eels, but they sure as biscuits will judge you. And hard. They didn't swim here from the deep Sargasso to just let you slide by. Whumblorn is here to make you a better person. And that starts with judgement. His eye isn't reading your shirt. It's reading your soul. And he's not at all sure that you're ready for what's coming next. Meme text reads: "Bro. Eels don't have feathers."
January 2, 2026 at 6:44 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
In January 1421 a small fleet of Dutch ships arrived in London. And did they bring the eels? Oh yeah.

One ship, belonging to Gerbrand Heykysson, unloaded 400 large eels, 2,700 medium eels, 23,00 small eels, & 6 barrels of salted eels.

Also a small sack of feathers.
🗃️🧪
Meme. Photograph of an American eel underwater, peeking out from some rocks. We'll call him Whumblorn. He looks skeptical about life in general, and about you specifically. His red eye is rimmed in blue, and he seems to be staring right through your chest, like he wants to read the funny thing on the back of your shirt by looking through you. Whumblorn's underneath is a beautiful silver color, and his top is a dull black. Don't judge, though. This seems natural for him, and he is perhaps wondering why your top and bottom are the same colors. You don't get to judge the eels, but they sure as biscuits will judge you. And hard. They didn't swim here from the deep Sargasso to just let you slide by. Whumblorn is here to make you a better person. And that starts with judgement. His eye isn't reading your shirt. It's reading your soul. And he's not at all sure that you're ready for what's coming next. Meme text reads: "Bro. Eels don't have feathers."
January 2, 2026 at 6:44 PM
Reposted by Surprised Eel Historian, PhD
greenleejw.bsky.social
I’ve only ever painted one thing on canvas, and it’s this: a 3 foot tall piece that I did almost 20 yrs ago. I expanded it from a drawing I’d done in a sketchbook, and I’m still quite fond of it.
Art. Black and white painting on canvas showing a man on tiptoes reaching up into a withered tree to grab a lone apple. A late snake is wrapped around the tree truck, and winds through the man’s legs. Its head is raised to look up at the apple.
January 1, 2026 at 11:45 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
I’ve only ever painted one thing on canvas, and it’s this: a 3 foot tall piece that I did almost 20 yrs ago. I expanded it from a drawing I’d done in a sketchbook, and I’m still quite fond of it.
Art. Black and white painting on canvas showing a man on tiptoes reaching up into a withered tree to grab a lone apple. A late snake is wrapped around the tree truck, and winds through the man’s legs. Its head is raised to look up at the apple.
January 1, 2026 at 11:45 PM
greenleejw.bsky.social
Yessssss. This year is off to a good start
Screenshot from the Mirriam-Webster gif. Against a greenish blue background in white letters is a title reading : “Your 2026 Word”. Below, in bold black letters, is the word “GOAT.”
January 1, 2026 at 10:50 PM