Garrett Pierce
@garrettfpierce.bsky.social
Once, current, and future moron
Formerly @garrettfpierce on Twitter
Formerly @garrettfpierce on Twitter
“Out of all the reindeer, you know you’re the mastermind” is probably one of the most bizarre opening lines to a song in history.
December 14, 2025 at 3:15 AM
“Out of all the reindeer, you know you’re the mastermind” is probably one of the most bizarre opening lines to a song in history.
Why are you, a grown adult man, commenting on anything having to do with the show Euphoria
December 13, 2025 at 3:01 AM
Why are you, a grown adult man, commenting on anything having to do with the show Euphoria
People have been talking about nuclear fission for a long time. I have been doing something since middle school that I call nuclear fishin’, in which I throw fireworks into the river and see what happens.
Today I learned about homophones.
Today I learned about homophones.
December 12, 2025 at 8:34 PM
People have been talking about nuclear fission for a long time. I have been doing something since middle school that I call nuclear fishin’, in which I throw fireworks into the river and see what happens.
Today I learned about homophones.
Today I learned about homophones.
Me: I think everyone should be free to enjoy the things they like. People are too mean about other people enjoying things.
Someone: I like anime
Me: go fuck yourself
Someone: I like anime
Me: go fuck yourself
December 9, 2025 at 3:23 AM
Me: I think everyone should be free to enjoy the things they like. People are too mean about other people enjoying things.
Someone: I like anime
Me: go fuck yourself
Someone: I like anime
Me: go fuck yourself
Every time I mean to talk about Bath and Body Works, I say Bed Bath and Beyond instead. At this point the two companies should merge solely so I can stop looking like an idiot
December 8, 2025 at 1:41 PM
Every time I mean to talk about Bath and Body Works, I say Bed Bath and Beyond instead. At this point the two companies should merge solely so I can stop looking like an idiot
Average Guitar Center customer tbh
December 4, 2025 at 4:53 PM
Average Guitar Center customer tbh
Weird vibes! At the TSA checkpoint
December 2, 2025 at 7:35 PM
Weird vibes! At the TSA checkpoint
Hi all. It’s embarrassing to write this, but I have been made aware that the quality of my posts has indeed slipped due to the team I hired. I have terminated our contract and will be overseeing my posts personally for the foreseeable future. I will also identify the offending posts.
I’ve become much more busy over the last few weeks, so for the sake of efficiency and ensuring a steady stream of posts, I am outsourcing my work to a group of overseas. Quality will remain unchanged, that I can promise you.
November 28, 2025 at 3:14 PM
Hi all. It’s embarrassing to write this, but I have been made aware that the quality of my posts has indeed slipped due to the team I hired. I have terminated our contract and will be overseeing my posts personally for the foreseeable future. I will also identify the offending posts.
go fuck your self
November 28, 2025 at 3:10 PM
go fuck your self
mssed a blk frday sale on leters nd culd nt affrd more. hv 2 post lk ths for 4-c-able futr
November 27, 2025 at 3:17 PM
mssed a blk frday sale on leters nd culd nt affrd more. hv 2 post lk ths for 4-c-able futr
american snack food weird
November 26, 2025 at 12:22 PM
american snack food weird
tfw pants shitted
November 25, 2025 at 11:33 PM
tfw pants shitted
nine eleven laughter
November 25, 2025 at 12:30 PM
nine eleven laughter
My Star Wars rankings:
1. Watch
2. Whichever
3. Movies
4. You
5. Like
6. And
7. Shut
8. Up
9. The Rise of Skywalker
1. Watch
2. Whichever
3. Movies
4. You
5. Like
6. And
7. Shut
8. Up
9. The Rise of Skywalker
November 24, 2025 at 10:09 PM
My Star Wars rankings:
1. Watch
2. Whichever
3. Movies
4. You
5. Like
6. And
7. Shut
8. Up
9. The Rise of Skywalker
1. Watch
2. Whichever
3. Movies
4. You
5. Like
6. And
7. Shut
8. Up
9. The Rise of Skywalker
pants shit, right?
November 24, 2025 at 9:34 PM
pants shit, right?
I’ve become much more busy over the last few weeks, so for the sake of efficiency and ensuring a steady stream of posts, I am outsourcing my work to a group of overseas. Quality will remain unchanged, that I can promise you.
November 24, 2025 at 7:42 PM
I’ve become much more busy over the last few weeks, so for the sake of efficiency and ensuring a steady stream of posts, I am outsourcing my work to a group of overseas. Quality will remain unchanged, that I can promise you.
Slipped on a banana peel that I dropped today. Much to consider
I've never slipped on a banana peel. I've never even seen a banana peel in such a fashion where it could be slipped on.
The only logical conclusion is that the forces of this universe have decided that I am a superior being who shall not be bothered with trivial matters such as slippable peels
The only logical conclusion is that the forces of this universe have decided that I am a superior being who shall not be bothered with trivial matters such as slippable peels
November 24, 2025 at 6:13 PM
Slipped on a banana peel that I dropped today. Much to consider
besmirch is a goated word
November 23, 2025 at 6:12 PM
besmirch is a goated word
I've never slipped on a banana peel. I've never even seen a banana peel in such a fashion where it could be slipped on.
The only logical conclusion is that the forces of this universe have decided that I am a superior being who shall not be bothered with trivial matters such as slippable peels
The only logical conclusion is that the forces of this universe have decided that I am a superior being who shall not be bothered with trivial matters such as slippable peels
November 23, 2025 at 2:16 PM
I've never slipped on a banana peel. I've never even seen a banana peel in such a fashion where it could be slipped on.
The only logical conclusion is that the forces of this universe have decided that I am a superior being who shall not be bothered with trivial matters such as slippable peels
The only logical conclusion is that the forces of this universe have decided that I am a superior being who shall not be bothered with trivial matters such as slippable peels
You’re telling me a fried chicken fried this fried chicken at the chicken fry on a Friday
November 22, 2025 at 1:17 PM
You’re telling me a fried chicken fried this fried chicken at the chicken fry on a Friday
met a man named Hugo out in the wild the other day. truly harrowing stuff
November 22, 2025 at 1:04 PM
met a man named Hugo out in the wild the other day. truly harrowing stuff
It’s very simple, really
I am not interested in AI generated art
Art is an expression of humanity
I am not interested in AI generated art
Art is an expression of humanity
November 20, 2025 at 6:30 PM
It’s very simple, really
I am not interested in AI generated art
Art is an expression of humanity
I am not interested in AI generated art
Art is an expression of humanity