Where turbulence is the least of your concerns.
😈✈️🧳
https://flyandcry.com/ - click if you dare
We don’t.
You’ll suffer, but at least you’ll know it’s official.
✈️ Follow the world’s worst - but most honest airline.
Passengers who accidentally receive two meal trays must eat both.
Sharing is forbidden.
Regret is included at no extra cost.
Passengers who accidentally receive two meal trays must eat both.
Sharing is forbidden.
Regret is included at no extra cost.
We've enhanced our entertainment magazines by adding "interactive" elements – random coffee stains that double as Rorschach tests.
Interpret your fears mid-flight for free!
We've enhanced our entertainment magazines by adding "interactive" elements – random coffee stains that double as Rorschach tests.
Interpret your fears mid-flight for free!
It’s the most reliable tracking system we have.
It’s the most reliable tracking system we have.
When flying over water, save $30 by signing a waiver to forgo the life jacket. In the event of a crash, we'll save on search and recovery costs for your body. 💸🪦
Eco-friendly and cost-effective — become one with the ocean." 🌍🐟
When flying over water, save $30 by signing a waiver to forgo the life jacket. In the event of a crash, we'll save on search and recovery costs for your body. 💸🪦
Eco-friendly and cost-effective — become one with the ocean." 🌍🐟
Our loyalty program is simple:
the more you follow us, the less likely we are to follow you into your nightmares
Our loyalty program is simple:
the more you follow us, the less likely we are to follow you into your nightmares
📱 “Look at your neighbor’s phone™”
No screens. No movies.
Just raw access to someone else's private life.
💶 €6 for screen access
🎤 €9 with commentary from the flight attendant
📱 “Look at your neighbor’s phone™”
No screens. No movies.
Just raw access to someone else's private life.
💶 €6 for screen access
🎤 €9 with commentary from the flight attendant
Now with complimentary hair loss.
No refunds.
Now with complimentary hair loss.
No refunds.
A seat? No. The pilot’s lap. For extroverts only.
👁️ Full view of the cockpit and his breakdown
🗣️ Heart-to-hearts at 30,000 ft
🎮 Every turn? Your call
💸 Just €499 + a psych eval
🔥 You can’t get closer to disaster.
A seat? No. The pilot’s lap. For extroverts only.
👁️ Full view of the cockpit and his breakdown
🗣️ Heart-to-hearts at 30,000 ft
🎮 Every turn? Your call
💸 Just €499 + a psych eval
🔥 You can’t get closer to disaster.
We offset emissions by making you hold your breath.
Free lung workout! 💨
We offset emissions by making you hold your breath.
Free lung workout! 💨
We hang a rubber pilot dummy in the back galley. Punch all you want.
$19.99 per round or unlimited access for $49.99
For $500, you can beat the crap out of a real pilot!
For $700, we’ll even close the curtain
We hang a rubber pilot dummy in the back galley. Punch all you want.
$19.99 per round or unlimited access for $49.99
For $500, you can beat the crap out of a real pilot!
For $700, we’ll even close the curtain
Our staff are like that too - just without winning anything.
Our staff are like that too - just without winning anything.
Please place it around your neck and tighten securely.
Thank you for flying with us! ✈️🧡
Please place it around your neck and tighten securely.
Thank you for flying with us! ✈️🧡
We hate airports.
We hate passengers. Especially you.
But here we are - because bills don’t pay themselves
We hate airports.
We hate passengers. Especially you.
But here we are - because bills don’t pay themselves
Uniforms made from recycled complaints
Language spoken: passive aggression
Their main mission is to survive the shift
Uniforms made from recycled complaints
Language spoken: passive aggression
Their main mission is to survive the shift
We would comment, but our Caracas flight is still taxiing in Minsk.
And the crew thinks it’s Vienna.
We would comment, but our Caracas flight is still taxiing in Minsk.
And the crew thinks it’s Vienna.
All lies! Our happy passengers would never let us get away with that.
All lies! Our happy passengers would never let us get away with that.
We don’t.
You’ll suffer, but at least you’ll know it’s official.
✈️ Follow the world’s worst - but most honest airline.
We don’t.
You’ll suffer, but at least you’ll know it’s official.
✈️ Follow the world’s worst - but most honest airline.