A Brand New Daybian Lapham
@fabianlapham.bsky.social
Oh you have a baby? That’s cool, I used to be one of those, ask it if it’s heard of me.
TWO READERS ENTER. ONE READER LEAVES.
February 8, 2026 at 12:20 AM
TWO READERS ENTER. ONE READER LEAVES.
Fictional characters love Harold & Maude the way the French loved Jerry Lewis. It's an important part of their culture.
February 5, 2026 at 8:55 AM
Fictional characters love Harold & Maude the way the French loved Jerry Lewis. It's an important part of their culture.
This is the kind of thing 10-year-old-me dreamed about. This is the kind of thing 10-year-old-me would have killed for.
February 5, 2026 at 8:37 AM
This is the kind of thing 10-year-old-me dreamed about. This is the kind of thing 10-year-old-me would have killed for.
I’m not saying we’re living in a dystopia, but I just found a job where they set up cameras in your home and use your private life to train robots, it pays $6 an hour.
January 31, 2026 at 7:01 AM
I’m not saying we’re living in a dystopia, but I just found a job where they set up cameras in your home and use your private life to train robots, it pays $6 an hour.
Reposted by A Brand New Daybian Lapham
X is hiring a creative writing specialist at $40 an hour to make Grok better at writing and a true LOL at the qualifications
January 30, 2026 at 8:14 PM
X is hiring a creative writing specialist at $40 an hour to make Grok better at writing and a true LOL at the qualifications
Prime Possum could do Scarface, but Al Pacino couldn’t make kids go to bed at 7:30
January 27, 2026 at 7:50 AM
Prime Possum could do Scarface, but Al Pacino couldn’t make kids go to bed at 7:30
She’d legit smash it though.
Sometimes I have imposter syndrome and sometimes I have the complete opposite where I look at an embroidery social media job and have to be like “Ash. You’ve embroidered TWO THINGS!”
January 24, 2026 at 4:30 AM
She’d legit smash it though.
Drivers are actually only required to look the one way when backing out of a driveway, at least on the street where I jog
January 20, 2026 at 9:43 PM
Drivers are actually only required to look the one way when backing out of a driveway, at least on the street where I jog
Reposted by A Brand New Daybian Lapham
A fine memory from @fabianlapham.bsky.social
January 7, 2026 at 8:44 PM
A fine memory from @fabianlapham.bsky.social
I literally thought Utero was a city Nirvana toured through
January 6, 2026 at 8:45 PM
I literally thought Utero was a city Nirvana toured through
Whippet Jesus: When you saw only one set of footprints in the sand; that was when you carried me.
January 4, 2026 at 10:30 PM
Whippet Jesus: When you saw only one set of footprints in the sand; that was when you carried me.
“Autistic people find each other”
yeah in my experience, so do people whose favourite ninja turtle is Donatello. oh
yeah in my experience, so do people whose favourite ninja turtle is Donatello. oh
January 4, 2026 at 9:30 AM
“Autistic people find each other”
yeah in my experience, so do people whose favourite ninja turtle is Donatello. oh
yeah in my experience, so do people whose favourite ninja turtle is Donatello. oh
I’m writing a remake of Sunset Boulevard where Norma Desmond is an ageing Vine star
January 2, 2026 at 7:36 AM
I’m writing a remake of Sunset Boulevard where Norma Desmond is an ageing Vine star
I don’t "hoard", I fully maximise the product life cycle of of the toys I had when I was eight.
December 29, 2025 at 9:41 PM
I don’t "hoard", I fully maximise the product life cycle of of the toys I had when I was eight.
Reposted by A Brand New Daybian Lapham
The teens are calling it hot-bagging, you sneak a supermarket roast chook on a plane and eat it in the bathroom, if you get caught you have to sit greasy all the way home and a six month ban, enthusiasts say the thrill is worth the risk
December 29, 2025 at 7:40 AM
The teens are calling it hot-bagging, you sneak a supermarket roast chook on a plane and eat it in the bathroom, if you get caught you have to sit greasy all the way home and a six month ban, enthusiasts say the thrill is worth the risk
Doctor: If you are in love with both Betty and Veronica, then the answer is simple; you must try polyamory.
Poly Archie: But Doctor...
Poly Archie: But Doctor...
December 22, 2025 at 11:39 PM
Doctor: If you are in love with both Betty and Veronica, then the answer is simple; you must try polyamory.
Poly Archie: But Doctor...
Poly Archie: But Doctor...
I read a post on Facebook that lactose intolerant kids are forming gangs and roaming the streets at night, they guzzle milk on public sports grounds and then they shit themselves
December 19, 2025 at 5:17 AM
I read a post on Facebook that lactose intolerant kids are forming gangs and roaming the streets at night, they guzzle milk on public sports grounds and then they shit themselves
Omg the trailer for that Jimmy Stewart biopic is bonkers
December 18, 2025 at 7:23 AM
Omg the trailer for that Jimmy Stewart biopic is bonkers
Reposted by A Brand New Daybian Lapham
I did some art for my Husband’s project, it’s always so fun to just finish something ourselves.
December 17, 2025 at 12:09 PM
I did some art for my Husband’s project, it’s always so fun to just finish something ourselves.
Doctors won’t tell you this, but you can cure yourself of asthma by learning how to be brave in an 80s kid’s film
December 17, 2025 at 9:06 AM
Doctors won’t tell you this, but you can cure yourself of asthma by learning how to be brave in an 80s kid’s film
Reposted by A Brand New Daybian Lapham
(imagining a man in a hat) ah, a honest sensible fellow, doubtless on his way to complete a job of work
(imagining the hat is on a rakish tilt) Scoundrel! Cutthroat! His bastard offspring swell our schoolyards!
(imagining the hat is on a rakish tilt) Scoundrel! Cutthroat! His bastard offspring swell our schoolyards!
December 16, 2025 at 11:02 PM
(imagining a man in a hat) ah, a honest sensible fellow, doubtless on his way to complete a job of work
(imagining the hat is on a rakish tilt) Scoundrel! Cutthroat! His bastard offspring swell our schoolyards!
(imagining the hat is on a rakish tilt) Scoundrel! Cutthroat! His bastard offspring swell our schoolyards!
More wings.
December 16, 2025 at 10:32 PM
More wings.
Reposted by A Brand New Daybian Lapham
Me: no amontillado brandy for me, I'm full to the brim with creams and cheeses
My rival: (seething) I thought you couldn't digest dairy
Me: haha oh yes I'll pay for it in the morning
My rival: (seething) I thought you couldn't digest dairy
Me: haha oh yes I'll pay for it in the morning
December 14, 2025 at 12:06 AM
Me: no amontillado brandy for me, I'm full to the brim with creams and cheeses
My rival: (seething) I thought you couldn't digest dairy
Me: haha oh yes I'll pay for it in the morning
My rival: (seething) I thought you couldn't digest dairy
Me: haha oh yes I'll pay for it in the morning
Me & my friends getting around the age verification questions on Leisure Suit Larry
December 10, 2025 at 6:22 AM
Me & my friends getting around the age verification questions on Leisure Suit Larry
Hollywood is so fake. Like, I don’t think any of that stuff happens. I saw one film that had a dragon in it, that can’t be real.
December 6, 2025 at 10:01 AM
Hollywood is so fake. Like, I don’t think any of that stuff happens. I saw one film that had a dragon in it, that can’t be real.