EmilyInPortland
@emilyinportland.bsky.social
Love me. But from, like, way over there.
If you're feeling anxious while sitting around the table, picture the Kennedy/Hines Thanksgiving. You'll feel so much better where you are.
November 27, 2025 at 8:18 PM
If you're feeling anxious while sitting around the table, picture the Kennedy/Hines Thanksgiving. You'll feel so much better where you are.
In the Thanksgiving dinner of life I'm the dry side dish no one eats but is perfectly content being left alone and not mushed in with all the other food.
November 27, 2025 at 7:59 PM
In the Thanksgiving dinner of life I'm the dry side dish no one eats but is perfectly content being left alone and not mushed in with all the other food.
Finally time to sit back and watch some quality TV, I say RealHousewivesofSaltLakeCityly
November 27, 2025 at 2:20 AM
Finally time to sit back and watch some quality TV, I say RealHousewivesofSaltLakeCityly
The goal is to amass enough money to cushion yourself from the Karma that's coming to you for amassing that amount of money.
November 26, 2025 at 10:05 PM
The goal is to amass enough money to cushion yourself from the Karma that's coming to you for amassing that amount of money.
Rolling my eyes when a see a giant F-150 rolling down the street with a giant flag fluttering from the truck bed.
Eyebrows lifting in surprised delight as the truck gets closer and I realize it's actually a trans flag.
Eyebrows lifting in surprised delight as the truck gets closer and I realize it's actually a trans flag.
November 26, 2025 at 5:31 PM
Rolling my eyes when a see a giant F-150 rolling down the street with a giant flag fluttering from the truck bed.
Eyebrows lifting in surprised delight as the truck gets closer and I realize it's actually a trans flag.
Eyebrows lifting in surprised delight as the truck gets closer and I realize it's actually a trans flag.
I'll be living in the moment at 4pm on Friday
November 25, 2025 at 3:40 PM
I'll be living in the moment at 4pm on Friday
If you show up late to Thanksgiving dinner, you're an asshole.
If you show up late to Thanksgiving dinner with a dish that needs to be heated for an hour, you're a double secret asshole.
If you show up late to Thanksgiving dinner with a dish that needs to be heated for an hour, you're a double secret asshole.
November 24, 2025 at 8:39 PM
If you show up late to Thanksgiving dinner, you're an asshole.
If you show up late to Thanksgiving dinner with a dish that needs to be heated for an hour, you're a double secret asshole.
If you show up late to Thanksgiving dinner with a dish that needs to be heated for an hour, you're a double secret asshole.
Our economy is just the same, like 5, rich people looping money back and forth to each other.
November 24, 2025 at 7:27 PM
Our economy is just the same, like 5, rich people looping money back and forth to each other.
Due to Federal budget cuts, Oregon is ending its real-time tsunami warning. Now we'll have to binge-watch our tsunami warnings a week later.
November 24, 2025 at 6:26 PM
Due to Federal budget cuts, Oregon is ending its real-time tsunami warning. Now we'll have to binge-watch our tsunami warnings a week later.
It's that time of year when you sign up for emails to get 10% off then regret doing that for years to come.
November 24, 2025 at 4:57 PM
It's that time of year when you sign up for emails to get 10% off then regret doing that for years to come.
My family loves a traditional Thanksgiving - turkey, stuffing, gravy, mash potatoes, gender norms.
November 23, 2025 at 10:32 PM
My family loves a traditional Thanksgiving - turkey, stuffing, gravy, mash potatoes, gender norms.
Don't tell all of us that I'm saying this but all of us are pretty stupid, right?
November 22, 2025 at 4:54 PM
Don't tell all of us that I'm saying this but all of us are pretty stupid, right?
My body is aging in to my personality
November 20, 2025 at 6:55 PM
My body is aging in to my personality
Our current world seems like a place where someone has named his kid Tetanus.
November 19, 2025 at 6:28 PM
Our current world seems like a place where someone has named his kid Tetanus.
@theferocity.bsky.social I agree with @zachstafford.bsky.social , Saeed needs to go to Montreal. I was there this summer and I said many times, "damn this place is teeming with beautiful gay men".
November 19, 2025 at 5:20 PM
@theferocity.bsky.social I agree with @zachstafford.bsky.social , Saeed needs to go to Montreal. I was there this summer and I said many times, "damn this place is teeming with beautiful gay men".
Microsoft changed the Excel icon. I don't know if I can keep working under these conditions.
November 17, 2025 at 9:49 PM
Microsoft changed the Excel icon. I don't know if I can keep working under these conditions.
Be nice to people. You never know who might be your mysterious benefactor.
November 17, 2025 at 7:47 PM
Be nice to people. You never know who might be your mysterious benefactor.
@theferocity.bsky.social Hi Saeed. Your TV posts have me wondering if you've seen Malice, a new series on Prime? It's a gross rich people being awful show. However, it contains elements that need a good Saeed hot-take.
Just throwing that out there 😁
Just throwing that out there 😁
November 17, 2025 at 4:37 PM
@theferocity.bsky.social Hi Saeed. Your TV posts have me wondering if you've seen Malice, a new series on Prime? It's a gross rich people being awful show. However, it contains elements that need a good Saeed hot-take.
Just throwing that out there 😁
Just throwing that out there 😁
Two police cars - lights flashing - just drove by each other heading in the opposite direction. I wonder which one is going the wrong way?
November 16, 2025 at 4:22 PM
Two police cars - lights flashing - just drove by each other heading in the opposite direction. I wonder which one is going the wrong way?
Hey, it's ok to go into cognitive dissonance mode just to enjoy your weekend.
November 15, 2025 at 5:43 PM
Hey, it's ok to go into cognitive dissonance mode just to enjoy your weekend.
Switching into half-ass mode a bit later than usual.
November 14, 2025 at 8:11 PM
Switching into half-ass mode a bit later than usual.
If you want to see me absolutely lose my shit, give me a service window of between 10am - 2pm then not show up precisely at 10am.
November 13, 2025 at 6:54 PM
If you want to see me absolutely lose my shit, give me a service window of between 10am - 2pm then not show up precisely at 10am.
I gotta empty my deleted emails so my phone will be lighter
November 13, 2025 at 6:37 PM
I gotta empty my deleted emails so my phone will be lighter
If you want an arrogant person to be taken down a notch ask him to say "specificity"
November 12, 2025 at 9:26 PM
If you want an arrogant person to be taken down a notch ask him to say "specificity"