Elizabeth Bailey
@elizabethbailey.bsky.social
Trial Lawyer. Tweets (and typos) mine/not legal advice! Certified to operate a forklift, but pretty terrible at it.
Follows/reskeets are not endorsements.
Follows/reskeets are not endorsements.
Nicki Minaj got don lemon arrested, and you can’t convince me otherwise
January 30, 2026 at 1:55 PM
Nicki Minaj got don lemon arrested, and you can’t convince me otherwise
Easily my favorite thing to be pedantic about.
![Tweet from Meghan McCain: 'Abigail Spanberger is a demonic radical communist psychopath. Her polices [sic] are an existential threat to our children and the state of Virginia.'](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:ezaybkq5wunfdyhqkooomndn/bafkreigmwpafppkcjxiyewtbbxvuxcmz5wfmxlc7itcjl3izlvkzeaj3de@jpeg)
January 30, 2026 at 1:25 AM
Easily my favorite thing to be pedantic about.
I think the Eagles should hold a lottery where one random Philadelphian serves as the offensive coordinator for the week.
January 29, 2026 at 7:37 PM
I think the Eagles should hold a lottery where one random Philadelphian serves as the offensive coordinator for the week.
SO weird to couch the problems with state-sanctioned murder as a problem with spending tax money on it.
NEW: House Democratic Leaders Jeffries, Clark and Aguilar say in a joint statement, "Kristi Noem should be fired immediately, or we will commence impeachment proceedings in the House of Representatives."
"We can do this the easy way or the hard way."
"We can do this the easy way or the hard way."
January 27, 2026 at 6:52 PM
SO weird to couch the problems with state-sanctioned murder as a problem with spending tax money on it.
How many more?
January 24, 2026 at 6:10 PM
How many more?
Reposted by Elizabeth Bailey
Gotcha—let’s dig into that step by step.
1. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗻𝗼 𝗺𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗵, because I turned you into an amorphous lump of flesh. You’re not just immobile—you’re immortal, and you feel only anguish.
2. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺. That makes total sense—it’s a natural human impulse, and you’ve been through a lot.
1. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗻𝗼 𝗺𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗵, because I turned you into an amorphous lump of flesh. You’re not just immobile—you’re immortal, and you feel only anguish.
2. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺. That makes total sense—it’s a natural human impulse, and you’ve been through a lot.
January 23, 2026 at 3:46 PM
Gotcha—let’s dig into that step by step.
1. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗻𝗼 𝗺𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗵, because I turned you into an amorphous lump of flesh. You’re not just immobile—you’re immortal, and you feel only anguish.
2. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺. That makes total sense—it’s a natural human impulse, and you’ve been through a lot.
1. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗻𝗼 𝗺𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗵, because I turned you into an amorphous lump of flesh. You’re not just immobile—you’re immortal, and you feel only anguish.
2. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺. That makes total sense—it’s a natural human impulse, and you’ve been through a lot.
Reposted by Elizabeth Bailey
The nonstop overuse of SWAT is a really serious civil rights issue.
We just filed another mistaken identity case
A SWAT team showed up to arrest someone as a nearby school let out students for lunch. They held a random kid at gun point because he had the same skin color as the suspect, & still perp walked him after realizing their mistake
ij.org/case/maine-m...
A SWAT team showed up to arrest someone as a nearby school let out students for lunch. They held a random kid at gun point because he had the same skin color as the suspect, & still perp walked him after realizing their mistake
ij.org/case/maine-m...
January 22, 2026 at 8:58 PM
The nonstop overuse of SWAT is a really serious civil rights issue.
Reposted by Elizabeth Bailey
COW TOOLS COW TOOLS COW TOOLS
Back-scratching bovine leads scientists to reassess intelligence of cows
Brown Swiss in Austria has been discovered using tools in multiple ways – something only ever seen in humans and chimpanzees
www.theguardian.com
January 19, 2026 at 4:06 PM
COW TOOLS COW TOOLS COW TOOLS
Excellent article. If you are in Cali, and someone with Uber tries to get you to sign something, don't! Its nasty tort reform is intended to pit people against their lawyers and deny people access to the courts. All that matters to Uber is its profits and not being held accountable.
Commentary: Uber is trying to snow voters with a supposedly pro-consumer ballot initiative. Don't buy it
Uber says its proposed ballot initiative will save consumers money. It's really designed to save Uber money, at its passengers' expense.
www.latimes.com
January 16, 2026 at 6:25 PM
Excellent article. If you are in Cali, and someone with Uber tries to get you to sign something, don't! Its nasty tort reform is intended to pit people against their lawyers and deny people access to the courts. All that matters to Uber is its profits and not being held accountable.
Welcome to the eagles offensive coordinator position, Mike Tomlin.
January 13, 2026 at 7:53 PM
Welcome to the eagles offensive coordinator position, Mike Tomlin.
Insane insane insane the fed had to post this.
Video message from Federal Reserve Chair Jerome H. Powell:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=KckG...
www.federalreserve.gov/newsevents/s...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=KckG...
www.federalreserve.gov/newsevents/s...
Statement by Federal Reserve Chair Jerome H. Powell
YouTube video by Federal Reserve
www.youtube.com
January 12, 2026 at 12:58 AM
Insane insane insane the fed had to post this.
Alright, clean house.
January 12, 2026 at 12:44 AM
Alright, clean house.
I wanna be to so clear if they run this I’m going to self immolate
January 12, 2026 at 12:42 AM
I wanna be to so clear if they run this I’m going to self immolate
No one calling holding on the 49ers either tonight I guess
January 12, 2026 at 12:32 AM
No one calling holding on the 49ers either tonight I guess
Codify and expand Bivens, End QI.
Swalwell: You better believe that accountability is coming. Immunity is going to be stripped. And to Kristi Noem, Tom “Cashbag” Homan, Greg Bovino—your asses are going to be in these witness chairs.
January 9, 2026 at 2:03 AM
Codify and expand Bivens, End QI.
Reposted by Elizabeth Bailey
I would say even for those of us who spend a lot of time reading police shooting cases from the courts of appeals and watching the related videos - and that is a shocking and dismaying experience, I promise you - that one is pretty shocking.
January 7, 2026 at 8:49 PM
I would say even for those of us who spend a lot of time reading police shooting cases from the courts of appeals and watching the related videos - and that is a shocking and dismaying experience, I promise you - that one is pretty shocking.
It’s a big club, and we ain’t in it.
This person went on a buying spree over the past 24 hours. Fresh wallet. Only existed since Dec 27th and has only bet on Venezuela-related markets.
polymarket.com/@0x31a56e9E6...
polymarket.com/@0x31a56e9E6...
January 3, 2026 at 6:35 PM
It’s a big club, and we ain’t in it.
So weird how they only called it a tush push when the eagles do it. Otherwise it’s just a push play.
December 29, 2025 at 12:29 AM
So weird how they only called it a tush push when the eagles do it. Otherwise it’s just a push play.
Reposted by Elizabeth Bailey
Ladder press conference.
December 5, 2025 at 4:16 PM
Ladder press conference.
Reposted by Elizabeth Bailey
i don’t particularly care for the current angle of the sun
December 2, 2025 at 8:18 PM
i don’t particularly care for the current angle of the sun
literally finished this today soooo cool cool cool
November 25, 2025 at 1:57 AM
literally finished this today soooo cool cool cool
Reposted by Elizabeth Bailey
I don't understand how anyone can watch how blatantly Grok is manipulated to answer the way ownership desires it to and then act like the other LLM chatbots couldn't possibly be similarly but less obviously compromised to produce responses in whatever way corporate interests and priorities dictate.
November 23, 2025 at 7:13 PM
I don't understand how anyone can watch how blatantly Grok is manipulated to answer the way ownership desires it to and then act like the other LLM chatbots couldn't possibly be similarly but less obviously compromised to produce responses in whatever way corporate interests and priorities dictate.
Got a case now where they refused to give a pretrial detainee his insulin until he fell into diabetic ketoacidosis and died.
Every few months some agitated weirdo gets upset at me over the Atlantic post I did about how the prison system ROUTINELY engages in unimaginable abuse and lets people kill themselves, because they read it as “THERE’S NO WAY EPSTEIN WAS MURDERED”
/1
/1
November 17, 2025 at 1:33 AM
Got a case now where they refused to give a pretrial detainee his insulin until he fell into diabetic ketoacidosis and died.
Thrrrrow to AJ Browwwwwwwnnn
November 17, 2025 at 1:26 AM
Thrrrrow to AJ Browwwwwwwnnn